I relapsed
 

After months of sobriety, I relapsed tonight.

With all due respect to the well-meaning folks here, yes, I have a plan. Yes, I have tools. Yes, I am working with a doctor. I fell down.

What would be helpful right now are just some words of encouragement, along the lines of get back in the saddle. Rest tonight, and get at it tomorrow.

Anything that might be a source of encouragement when I check back in the morning.

Thanks community. I can do this. And a few words would be helpful.

Hi Change ,
I'm sorry you found yourself drinking when most of the time you want sobriety .
Took me 10 years from when i knew i had a problem, i tried giving up most weeks and lasted 7 days sometimes . I got over 4 years now if i can can do it then i recon you can too the highway is broad and long , if you spin out you can pick yourself up and come and join in again .

You just got to keep on with sobriety , seems like your still in the fight so keep on doing the next right thing for yourself , sobriety is worthwhile , this is a long journey keep your eyes on the prize .

keep on :You_Rock_

m

Sorry to hear about the slip, Change, but you came right back here and that's a good sign. Sounds like you want this, so get right back at it! The support is still here for you.

Delfin

I;m sorry you drank again C4G...

and with all due respect - I don't ask all the plan, tools and 'What might you do differently' stuff as any kind of 'tough love', a means of torture, a way to 'get my jollies' or seeking to make people feel worse than they already do...

I just really REALLY want to see people beat this thing - and I want that for you too :)

I believe you can do this - so, go do it :)

D

Same boat, Change. I had 4 months, then fell; unlike you it wasn't a night I fell off, but a month. Poof; yet another month of my life disappeared to booze. I'm now only a week back into sobriety; hurts, but I did this to myself and take responsibility.

So get back up, Change. Relapse can happen, and sometimes it happens to us. Find out why, dig yourself out of the negative feelings you are probably experiencing concerning yourself, and resolve yourself to sobriety again.

You can do this. If you're not comfortable with counting days or thinking of this as a day 1, then don't; the only thing you need to do right now is find out what event/circumstance you weren't prepared for and that tricked you into drinking, and to make sure you clearly understand how not to allow it happen again. Sometimes we get rabbit-punched in recovery; catch your breath, and then get back up.

You've got it, Change!

Good to see you. Welcome back

Only took me one time to go back to it all some 2 years ago. Gradually of course, but right back to it.

The difference between my experience and yours is that you came here and posted, and I didn't. A one day setback is better than 2 years Change4good. Don't let this effect you too bad, just pick up right where you left off yesterday.

1 night mistake doesn't undo months of sobriety, don't let it phase you. Get back on the horse and back on track.

Learn from it but forget about it too, beating yourself up about it is only giving your AV a perfect chance to butt in!

Good luck : )))

Don't let your lapse turn into a relapse. I drank last night too, and aside from feeling physically ill all day, I feel emotionally low for drinking too. It's not worth it. Let's get back on the horse.

I am glad you are back and ready to try again. But let's not kid ourselves, relapse is a serious thing and there is no gurantee that any of us will get another shot at sobriety. Not everyone makes it back, probably much to the horror of those that went out and found they could not get back.

My suggestion is to review what you have been doing so far and find out what needs to be changed.

If you have been honestly following a recovery program, taking all the suggested actions etc, and you end up drunk, maybe you need a different program.

If you haven't been giving it your all, perhaps you can work out where you have been holding back and identify exactly where it went wrong. In AA we might look for a secret kept, and amends we refuse to make, or maybe we dont help others, or perhaps we don't do the steps at all. Who knows? You do. No one else.

You can so do this. Onward and upward!

We've all been there.

One Good Thing is that you came here and you told on yourself. That was honest and honest is essential to recovery.

Get some water, get some rest, shake the alcohol out of your system and get back to your plan, back to your commitment and back on the track of a sober, rewarding life.

I know you know that every time we fall, we have the opportunity to learn - so my suggestion to you is that you search deeply about what you can learn about yourself, about your plan, about shifting to give yourself better support this time around.

You can do it.

:grouphug:

I use to think I knew it all. Sometimes a
cocky sob. Better than thou. And yet
as I continue to learn even today, it was
my stubbornness and selfishness, self-
centerness that got me no where's.

It has been thru daily living with a
recovery program taught to me,
incorporated in my everyday life
that is teaching me about humility.

To humble myself to the fact that
I don't know it all nor wish to. This
way I remain teachable, openminded,
willing and honest to do whatever
I need to do to continue to achieve
a healthy, happy, honest sober life.

Im learning that there's no room
in my life to be cocky, stubborn,
don't tell me what to do, I already
know it all. If I was to continue to
think I am then surely I will loose.

With quiet confidence I remain
teachable and sober. :)

We all simply want you and others to beat this, so the questions are nothing more than genuine concern, as sadly some don't make it back for a 2nd or 3rd thread post, so sometimes there may be only one shot to get a person thinking.

I'd concentrate and be encouraged by your couple of months of Sobreity, you didn't make it that far without some real tools and resources to hand, this doesn't take that away.

Keep moving forward, draw an immediate line under it, you can do this!! :)

Hi C4G, as you can see, we all support you. I agree with others in terms of make it a slip and not a full blown relapse. It's merely hours of your life. Pick up where you left off today and keep going. It's cliche, but you can do it. You know you can.

Hi C4G - I agree with the others. You didn't have a full blown relapse. You came right back here and are prepared to try again. A few hours doesn't erase all your months of sobriety.

I had a full relapse last year. A very small (and in retrospect, silly) thing kept me from posting and quitting again. As Quiet said, "If you're not comfortable with counting days or thinking of this as a day 1, then don't". After months of sobriety, I couldn't bear to see Day 1 again. So, I agree with Quiet. It's only important to dust yourself off and continue.

Hang in there. We're here for you.

The Race
attributed to Dr. D.H. "Dee" Groberg

Whenever I start to hang my head in front of failure’s face,
my downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.
A children’s race, young boys, young men; how I remember well,
excitement sure, but also fear, it wasn’t hard to tell.
They all lined up so full of hope, each thought to win that race
or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
Their parents watched from off the side, each cheering for their son,
and each boy hoped to show his folks that he would be the one.

The whistle blew and off they flew, like chariots of fire,
to win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
One boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd,
was running in the lead and thought “My dad will be so proud.”
But as he speeded down the field and crossed a shallow dip,
the little boy who thought he’d win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch himself, his arms flew everyplace,
and midst the laughter of the crowd he fell flat on his face.
As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn’t win it now.
Humiliated, he just wished to disappear somehow.

But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”
He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a bit that’s all,
and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win,
his mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.
He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace.
“I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.”

But through the laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face
with a steady look that said again, “Get up and win that race!”
So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind the last.
“If I’m to gain those yards,” he thought, “I’ve got to run real fast!”
Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight, then ten...
but trying hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.
Defeat! He lay there silently. A tear dropped from his eye.
“There’s no sense running anymore! Three strikes I’m out! Why try?
I’ve lost, so what’s the use?” he thought. “I’ll live with my disgrace.”
But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.

“Get up,” an echo sounded low, “you haven’t lost at all,
for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
Get up!” the echo urged him on, “Get up and take your place!
You were not meant for failure here! Get up and win that race!”
So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to forfeit,
and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.
So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been,
still he gave it all he had and ran like he could win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he rose again.
Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered another boy who crossed the line and won first place,
head high and proud and happy -- no falling, no disgrace.
But, when the fallen youngster crossed the line, in last place,
the crowd gave him a greater cheer for finishing the race.
And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud,
you would have thought he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”
“To me, you won,” his father said. “You rose each time you fell.”

And now when things seem dark and bleak and difficult to face,
the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
And when depression and despair shout loudly in my face,
another voice within me says, “Get up and win that race!”

I am here in full support of coming and being accountable, I know how hard it is not only to stop drinking but to admit when we have trouble.

I am sure you can pick up where you left off and keep on going. It is only one mistake don't dwell on it or you could drive yourself nuts.

Good luck on moving forward.

Welcome back C4G. Admitting you drank is difficult, kudos for doing so. As far as words of encouragement go, I think you are already aware that you have the tools and strength you need to stay sober, your past has shown that.

Regarding your first comment though, i hate to break it to you but you have to take the bad with the good. It's certainly helpful to move on and look at the positives, but we need to learn from our mistakes too. You say that you have a plan and are working with your doctor, but obviously your plan wasn't functioning last night. Look back to see where it went wrong...most times it's well before the actual act of drinking takes place..sometimes weeks before.

I noticed that you haven't been on the site in several months either, was SR part of your plan? If not maybe you could add some daily time here -I found it to be very beneficial for my recovery, and still do.