SoberLeigh

Welcome back to SR, Hopeless.

Can you talk with your doctor about your drinking, your desire to stop and your recent symptoms? I would think that those symptoms would warrant treatment of the symptoms and the alcoholism by your doctor.

Glad that you are back, Hopeless.

Hopeless84

I understand some, but the why me part just crossed my mind when I first started posting. My brother drinks as much as I do, but difference is his drinking mainly happens in the evening. I guess in the end I do need to stop comparing.

Maybe I will give a behavioral health center a few towns over a try. Heck I first called them because I wanted to inquire about electro shock therapy, but the doc said that might not be needed. I guess they could detox me and then prescribe the right meds to help control me. IDK.

Hopeless84

Tried before, but I usually only see the nurse practitioner. Called all step in clinics to ask for help, but once again said they could only help for certain things and to usually report back to my local doctor.

helpimalive

Could you look at the difference between you and those who can drink more with fewer apparent consequences as a blessing? Because if your situation is pushing you to stop and you do stop, you're WAY better off than those still drinking. Anything pushing you to stop is a stroke of luck, or a blessing if you're into that. Someone who drinks longer will ultimately do more damage to themselves and everyone around them.

tomsteve

welp, seeings ya thinkin of going to lengths to hook yerself up with est, im thinkin ya just may be willing to go to any lengths!
id say prolly be wise to get ALL alcohol outta yer house.
hows about AA?
any chance youve read the big book of AA and found out the life the program has to offer?

ya know, when i got sober( i went to aa) i was listening to tbe drinking thing. was thinkin that iffen i shared my quantities theyd say i didnt drink enough or wasnt bad enough.
then i started hearing.
what i was hearing was the thinkin thing. the insecurities, low self esteem, fears, false pride,ego,etc.

my thinkin was no different than the ex prostitute, man that lived on the streets, the proscuting atty, cop, ex gang member, business owner....
thats when i saw alcohol truly was a symptom of a much deeper problem.

Hopeless84

Well really can't get all alcohol out of the house... I live with my father. The EST thing was in hopes of helping my depression. And yes I have the big book that was given to me in rehab.

I have no hatred or dislike to AA, but in honesty... when I stopped smoking pot I just didn't want to site around and talk about it. Even dropped my only 2 friends because that is all they did. So I took it as them being toxic.

tomsteve

whats the "it" you refer to sitting around talking about?

Hopeless84

Sorry for the late reply, but been trying to take it easy on myself. The "it" I talk about would be basically related to Alcohol.

Roxyblues

Hopeless is the best place for an alcoholic to be. Until an alcoholic is utterly hopeless, change is very unlikely to occur. Just remember, it is always the darkest before the dawn.

Venecia

Welcome back to SR. This is a place of hope and transformation. If you have rejected AA, then it's good to look at what else will be part of your plan to gain sobriety and live in recovery. A few thoughts:

- Each month, there is a "class" for those who began their sober journeys at the same time. Many of us consider them instrumental in our recovery; they provide a welcoming place to share, be accountable and, importantly, support others. Here is the link to the newly launched October class:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...er-2015-a.html

- SR has meetings twice a week: 8 p.m. Central Time on Tuesday and Friday. They're a great way to get real-time support.

A couple other resources:
Self Help Addiction Recovery | SMART Recovery®

https://rational.org/index.php?id=1

Make the change. Comparing yourself to others you've determined are "luckier alcoholics" is unhealthy.

resolute50

Hi,
I'm resolute.

KAD

Hi Hopeless (I'd rather call you HopeFUL). Glad you're seeking help. I used to get caught up in comparing my drinking habits with those of others. It made it easy for me to conclude that maybe I didn't have as big a problem as I thought. Even though I was putting away about a 5th of vodka a day, I knew people who drank twice that much, sometimes more, and they were still alive and kicking. It took nearly killing myself in a car crash during a blackout for me to finally get it through my head that it's not the quantities that make the difference. It's how our bodies process the poison that matters. Mine was having a hard time with what I was feeding it, and it nearly killed me. There were plenty other warning signs along the way that I summarily ignored. After all, I didn't drink as much as some other people I knew. Drank a whole lot more than most, though!

Have you had some ideas about a recovery plan? There are several different ones you can explore here at SR.

Hopeless84

Hey, just wanted to say I am your lower state and live kind of close to the NC line. My mom lives there currently. I know comparing is kind of dumb, but just trying to find a doctor to take me more serious.

As plans right now I am not sure. SMART thing seems different, but tried locating meetings and well not really close. Just wishing at the moment I could find a good therapist I guess... idk. Even if I find a good therapist might try the A.A. route... at-least make some sober friends maybe? Oh and also at-least A.A. meetings are closer, not just wanting to go to make friends... but help myself with sobriety, but making a few of the same-minded type people a friend isn't so bad.

Wastinglife

I went to my local ER once for withdrawal. I was not experiencing harsh symptoms at the time I was admitted. I had drank 4 or 5 beers before I went in so I could get out of the house without my hands shaking. They understood what could happen without treatment and they admitted me overnight. Tell them about the auditory hallucinations in the past and they should see the risk of seizure

Hopeless84

I have in the past. Our city E.R. is kind of closed minded I think... they just say lower or stop drinking. I know we use to have a low cost detox facility in our area, but it has since been closed down due to funding issues I guess. Some doctors don't seem to understand, and even if you ask for help... around here some of them give you the meanest and dirtiest looks which makes you kind of feel lower and a waste of there time.

tomsteve

and now i apologize for not seeing ya got back and reply.

in aa we talk about our problems as they relate to alcoholism
AND
what the solutions are.

without talking about it i dont think i would have gotten solutions and recovered from the hopeless state of mind and body.

now, there are people that go on what i call drunkalogues and those that use meetings to "just vent" and dont want to hear solutions. there are even what i call dysfunctional meetings where thats all it is-all problems and no solutions.
but i have the choice to not listen to that.
i find structured meetings to be quite an experience still. meetings focused on step studies, big book studies,etc.
i was at one not too long ago that when asked for anniversaries over the last week, there was a person with 8 years sober, one with 90 days, 22 years, 60 days, and 28 years.it was quite an experience to hear them all speak.
and all of us had today. a miracle in itself.