New to the SR community
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 88
New to the SR community
Hi, I'm new here and working hard to finally kick my addiction to alcohol.
I really didn't start drinking till I was in my mid 20's. Never was around it much growing up, my parent's never really drank. But my then wife was around it most her life and grew up drinking. Mainly it started on the weekends drinking beer with the neighbors. But pretty soon the then wife and I would be putting back a case a night. This went on for a few years then divorce happened because of exwife's infidelity. By that time I had started my own auto shop which I had to liquidate in the divorce.
For a while I was living out of my truck till I could find a job. So I really didn't drink at that time and was trying to pick up the pieces of my shattered life. Found a great job, rented a house. Eventually saved the money and bought a house. Started dating a woman, that eventually moved in with me. There wasn't much to do in that small town especially in the MN winters except go up to the bars and drink. That turned into daily stop coming home from work. I would make it to work on time, but I was groggy and hung over most days. The relationship with the woman that was living with me for 2 1/2 years turned sour as I was never home always up at the bar or at the neighbors. Shortly after that I lost my job, do to that business closing, I did get unemployment for 6 months and found another job. I was 6 months sober at that point and life really was starting to move forward. Instead of going to the bar and drinking I turned to fixing up my house. I occupied my time fixing, building, getting my life back in order. Then the flood, I got the call from one of my neighbors that September day that I should get home. It was bad my newly renovated basement was completely full of water. Went to the bar and went on a bender. Life pretty much spiraled after that. Ended up loosing that house, again homeless with everything I own in a storage locker. I did find a place to rent that was right by my work. Sobered up yet again and put my nose to the grindstone and work. Another 6 months of sobriety, got really into the juicing trend. A new neighbor had moved in and I started to hang around him, one thing led to another and I was again drinking every night, this time It was the hardcore stuff and not just beer. The woman I had been dating was worried, but I just kinda hid it and only really drank when she was not around. We decided to move in together with her kids. Moved into a beautiful log cabin right next door to the rental I was in. The towns festival was going on and I got **** faced drunk. The woman I was dating had never seen me that drunk before. Well we moved in together last summer and it was going pretty good. I cut back on the drinking only a few beers a night. Then that lead into more, getting off work going to the bar every night. Pretty soon I was out every night till midnight, again groggy and hung over at work. I took another job that seemed so promising at first last spring. The long hours and pay wasn't what I was expecting. I started using hard alcohol to cope. Mix some vodka in my morning pop, arrive at work at 7, have a spare one in the car for a quick lunch. I was up to a 5th of vodka a day, not including the weekends where I would walk to the bar start at 9 am with about 10-20 screwdrivers. Walk back home at 8pm pass out on the couch and repeat on Sunday. Course I wasn't eating healthy, why screw up a 60 dollar buzz with cheap food. I was outta control, almost got hit by a train, fell down on the rocks on the tracks and knocked myself out, only to wake up in the morning in a fog. Called in sick to work that day saying I didn't feel well and decided to nap on the couch. Well around 1pm I decided to go drinking again. I went on a bender cycle that just repeated itself, day after day. Wasn't calling in sick to work anymore, just never showed up.
The final straw was when my GF's sister showed up to drop her kids off at our house for the weekend. I was passed out on my golf cart still drunk from the previous day. Right there got the intervention, they hauled me off to detox. My BAC the next day was at .287. Did 72 hours there then was waiting to get into a rehab program. July 22 of this year, a stayed sober most of August, with a relapse at the end there when a buddy who didn't know I wasn't drinking dropped off a 12 pack of beer for helping him with an electrical issue on a car. I dunno why in my mind I thought I will only have one, with in an hour that 12 pack was finished, I hid the evidence thinking no one the wiser. Well I decided to take a nap on the couch and the GF's mom showed up. She could tell I was drinking and was ticked because here I am getting drunk while her daughter is working 2 shifts to pay the bills. My parents came down and basically said they going to disown me, and I will be cut out of the will if I touch another drop of alcohol. The GF mom is good family friends with a local guy who is now a retired drug and alcohol counselor from Hazeltin, he brought me to AA meeting and we regularly do stuff together. I go to regular AA meetings, been sober since August 22. I still have cravings, I know if I have one drink I'm gunna go on a bender. I start a new job on Monday which looks promising. Now I drive by that bar and see all the regulars cars parked outside it, thinking that used to be me. I never want to return to that life style again. Slowly but surely I'm getting me back.. Glad there are sites out there I can talk to people going through the same struggles I am.
I really didn't start drinking till I was in my mid 20's. Never was around it much growing up, my parent's never really drank. But my then wife was around it most her life and grew up drinking. Mainly it started on the weekends drinking beer with the neighbors. But pretty soon the then wife and I would be putting back a case a night. This went on for a few years then divorce happened because of exwife's infidelity. By that time I had started my own auto shop which I had to liquidate in the divorce.
For a while I was living out of my truck till I could find a job. So I really didn't drink at that time and was trying to pick up the pieces of my shattered life. Found a great job, rented a house. Eventually saved the money and bought a house. Started dating a woman, that eventually moved in with me. There wasn't much to do in that small town especially in the MN winters except go up to the bars and drink. That turned into daily stop coming home from work. I would make it to work on time, but I was groggy and hung over most days. The relationship with the woman that was living with me for 2 1/2 years turned sour as I was never home always up at the bar or at the neighbors. Shortly after that I lost my job, do to that business closing, I did get unemployment for 6 months and found another job. I was 6 months sober at that point and life really was starting to move forward. Instead of going to the bar and drinking I turned to fixing up my house. I occupied my time fixing, building, getting my life back in order. Then the flood, I got the call from one of my neighbors that September day that I should get home. It was bad my newly renovated basement was completely full of water. Went to the bar and went on a bender. Life pretty much spiraled after that. Ended up loosing that house, again homeless with everything I own in a storage locker. I did find a place to rent that was right by my work. Sobered up yet again and put my nose to the grindstone and work. Another 6 months of sobriety, got really into the juicing trend. A new neighbor had moved in and I started to hang around him, one thing led to another and I was again drinking every night, this time It was the hardcore stuff and not just beer. The woman I had been dating was worried, but I just kinda hid it and only really drank when she was not around. We decided to move in together with her kids. Moved into a beautiful log cabin right next door to the rental I was in. The towns festival was going on and I got **** faced drunk. The woman I was dating had never seen me that drunk before. Well we moved in together last summer and it was going pretty good. I cut back on the drinking only a few beers a night. Then that lead into more, getting off work going to the bar every night. Pretty soon I was out every night till midnight, again groggy and hung over at work. I took another job that seemed so promising at first last spring. The long hours and pay wasn't what I was expecting. I started using hard alcohol to cope. Mix some vodka in my morning pop, arrive at work at 7, have a spare one in the car for a quick lunch. I was up to a 5th of vodka a day, not including the weekends where I would walk to the bar start at 9 am with about 10-20 screwdrivers. Walk back home at 8pm pass out on the couch and repeat on Sunday. Course I wasn't eating healthy, why screw up a 60 dollar buzz with cheap food. I was outta control, almost got hit by a train, fell down on the rocks on the tracks and knocked myself out, only to wake up in the morning in a fog. Called in sick to work that day saying I didn't feel well and decided to nap on the couch. Well around 1pm I decided to go drinking again. I went on a bender cycle that just repeated itself, day after day. Wasn't calling in sick to work anymore, just never showed up.
The final straw was when my GF's sister showed up to drop her kids off at our house for the weekend. I was passed out on my golf cart still drunk from the previous day. Right there got the intervention, they hauled me off to detox. My BAC the next day was at .287. Did 72 hours there then was waiting to get into a rehab program. July 22 of this year, a stayed sober most of August, with a relapse at the end there when a buddy who didn't know I wasn't drinking dropped off a 12 pack of beer for helping him with an electrical issue on a car. I dunno why in my mind I thought I will only have one, with in an hour that 12 pack was finished, I hid the evidence thinking no one the wiser. Well I decided to take a nap on the couch and the GF's mom showed up. She could tell I was drinking and was ticked because here I am getting drunk while her daughter is working 2 shifts to pay the bills. My parents came down and basically said they going to disown me, and I will be cut out of the will if I touch another drop of alcohol. The GF mom is good family friends with a local guy who is now a retired drug and alcohol counselor from Hazeltin, he brought me to AA meeting and we regularly do stuff together. I go to regular AA meetings, been sober since August 22. I still have cravings, I know if I have one drink I'm gunna go on a bender. I start a new job on Monday which looks promising. Now I drive by that bar and see all the regulars cars parked outside it, thinking that used to be me. I never want to return to that life style again. Slowly but surely I'm getting me back.. Glad there are sites out there I can talk to people going through the same struggles I am.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Florida., USA
Posts: 3,252
Welcome to SR Maffers. 
The folks here are very wise and have many, many years of accumulated sobriety. Reading and posting often will be a valuable tool in reinforcing your desire to remain alcohol free.
The folks here are very wise and have many, many years of accumulated sobriety. Reading and posting often will be a valuable tool in reinforcing your desire to remain alcohol free.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 88
Thanks ya all!
I should have done this a long time ago. But like many I didn't think I had a problem, living in somewhat denial. Hanging around people that had the same denial as me, that you though were your friends, but were just drinking buddies. I should have realized it and was told by my GF long ago she doesn't want to hang around my so called "Buddies" and they were losers. Now I'm off to rebuild my life without alcohol coursing through my veins ever again, it's gunna be a long journey, but with support I feel I can make it.
I should have done this a long time ago. But like many I didn't think I had a problem, living in somewhat denial. Hanging around people that had the same denial as me, that you though were your friends, but were just drinking buddies. I should have realized it and was told by my GF long ago she doesn't want to hang around my so called "Buddies" and they were losers. Now I'm off to rebuild my life without alcohol coursing through my veins ever again, it's gunna be a long journey, but with support I feel I can make it.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
