dunkelheit

I hit rock bottom a couple weeks ago, so today I'm starting specialized therapy for my personality disorder. I lost the love of my life, my home, and most of my hair over the past few months.

Has anyone done dialectical behavioural therapy before? Did it help? I'm paying $180/hour for this thing, so I want to make sure it's worth it. I've been in cognitive behavioural therapy for 12 years with no improvement, mainly because I don't take all the lame, chick-mentality BS seriously. I asked my psychiatrist specifically for a referral to a NO-BS clinical psychologist because I've seen hell, and the part of myself that might have been a good, well-adjusted person died a long time ago.

I'm not going to stop drinking, but I want to get back to the point I was at after I quit excessive drinking for the first time in 2010. My liver is at least getting better with a couple weeks of sobriety in between drinks. I'm sick of all these "Day 1's", like I had a couple glasses of wine last night, but I still consider my Day 1 August 31st because I'm within my personal goal. Considering I have a bit of liver damage, that's probably still too much, but way better than a fifth of vodka every night. I'm 110lbs, my drinking was insane for the past 9 months.

2muchpain

I was involved with DBT a while back and loved it. Got a lot out of it.
You have an interesting take on what a day 1 is. Hope that works out for you. John

Soberwolf

Best wishes with DBT

ScottFromWI

No offense Dunkelheit, but with that attitude and the delusion that you still think that you can drink I doubt any therapy is going to be effective. I wish you luck and certainly hope the new therapist can get through to you, but frankly until you stop drinking completely nothing is going to change I doubt.

Be very honest with the therapist about the fact that you are still drinking and try and have an open mind. If you go in with the preconceived notion that it's all "BS" it's not going to be helpful no matter what therapy you attempt.

Aellyce

I have not tried DBT myself because it's not something I think I would need much, but a few people I know have done and loved it. Some of these people had substance addiction problem in the past and carry multiple diagnoses. A couple of them even went back more than once because they found especially the skills training part very helpful. I also know professionals who provide this kind of therapy in the classic form and I like the complexity and structure of their program. I agree with Scott though: if you are going to continue drinking, even if with reduced intensity, you will most likely never achieve the results that you could as a sober person. Why don't you give a chance to doing the therapy sober, see what happens? Stop drinking now and commit to abstinence for the course of your treatment at least -- I am certain you would be able to absorb more from it that way and apply in a practical way more effectively. I also prefer a "no-BS" therapist and support where people are very direct and straight talking instead of psychobabble, but the truth is that it only works well if we have the same mentality ourselves to implement what we learn in our lives.

entropy1964

Hmmm. This is a bit of a conundrum. You are drinking enough of a neuro toxin/alcohol to cause liver damage...so you're drinking a lot. This neuro toxin causes changes in our brains and brain damage, often in areas of the brain that control emotional regulation...I believe a big challenge for folks with personality disorders. You want to attend some very pricey therapy to treat your personality disorder, or brain illness, through a psychological approach (a great idea btw). But you are unwilling to quit ingesting a drug that physiologically damages the very organ you are hoping to psychologically strengthen. That sounds kind of like doing bicep curls with a broken arm. The arm has to heal before the muscle can be strengthened and defined. Seems to me that's a lose lose proposition. I have been told by folks in the therapy biz that they won't even take an alcoholic client until they have been sober for 60 days. They need that time to heal, clear their heads and to be blunt, get their heads outta their tooshies. If nothing else, tell your therapist exactly what you just told us. My thoughts are if you are honest, and the person agrees to treat you under the terms you have outlined, they are just after your money.

dunkelheit

She knows. Part of the therapy is focused on substance abuse issues, because a lot of BPD people use drugs and drink excessively. The first session went fine, she doesn't seem as fake as my other therapists in the past. Maybe because her clients are a bunch of sarcastic, cynical bastards like me.

Aellyce

Glad to hear that, dunkelheit.

My therapist is also someone who has treated many people with substance abuse issues, although I was completely unaware of this fact of his history when we started. The therapeutic approach we use is psychoanalytic/psychodynamic, and many classical psychoanalysts would not touch active addicts. He does, using a "modern" approach. I started to work with him though when I was already over a year sober and as I became quite comfortable and steady in my sobriety, alcoholism wasn't a main issue we needed to address. But other obsessive and excessive tendencies of mine have been, oh my!

You have BPD... well, I experienced and displayed many features of it off and on as an active alcoholic. I am a mental health researcher myself and once I was involved in a project studying BPD, I was actually interviewing and collecting samples. The psychiatrist I had collaborated with told me many times that I seemed to have an ability to connect with his patients more than he ever could in spite of its being his chosen specialty. I don't know... there are many sides of all this.

One thing I can share though is that I have a student who is diagnosed BPD, former drug addict, had anxiety, depression, etc. We seem to work pretty well together.

If I may suggest anything, it is that you continue with your DBT no matter what

ScottFromWI

That's good to hear, I hope you can make some progress.