When is enough enough?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 1
When is enough enough?
I'm new to alanon and I need help. I'm not married to my a but we have been together almost 3 years. This may he used heroin again and ended in the er. He started aa for the first time and his drug and alcohol addictions have become the center of his life. I travel for work and have minimum energy for the drama of our lives. I recognize that my life is unmanageable from drug and alcohol use with ppl I have dated in the last and my current relationship. Right now I'm wondering: when is enough enough? I'm not confiden in who he is and I'm not sure so do know him. I think I want to break up, take a break, reset- but is that running away? Or simply facing reality? I'm desperate
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi and welcome.
I suggest going to the forum on this site called Friends and Families and also attending Al Anon meetings in your area.
The hows and whys are better handled there because of their long experience in dealing with us addicted people who do not have a reputation of golden honesty and following through in many cases.
BE WELL
I suggest going to the forum on this site called Friends and Families and also attending Al Anon meetings in your area.
The hows and whys are better handled there because of their long experience in dealing with us addicted people who do not have a reputation of golden honesty and following through in many cases.
BE WELL
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,174
Hi East side, welcome to Soberrecovery
Your question is not an easy one to answer definatively but IOAA2 is right in suggesting visiting the Friends and Family thread for ideas
What I took from your post is that you want to quit alcohol but that you have a partner who drinks/uses
I would suggest that if it is possible I would seperate from your partner temporarily in order to give yourself the best chance of quitting (after all you do have a duty to yourself as well as others) I appreciate that isn't an easy thing but it would be good for you and maybe it would encourage your partner to change too
Your question is not an easy one to answer definatively but IOAA2 is right in suggesting visiting the Friends and Family thread for ideas
What I took from your post is that you want to quit alcohol but that you have a partner who drinks/uses
I would suggest that if it is possible I would seperate from your partner temporarily in order to give yourself the best chance of quitting (after all you do have a duty to yourself as well as others) I appreciate that isn't an easy thing but it would be good for you and maybe it would encourage your partner to change too
It might be good for you to have some time to yourself. 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Eastsidehelp: It's not clear from your post whether you also have an alcohol or other addiction or whether the problem is your companion's or both. It's not running away to take a breather, separate for awhile and go to Alanon meetings and look at the Friends and Families forum on this website as IOAA2 suggests. You may not either of you get well if you try to hang together. An interesting movie to watch is "When A Man Loves a Woman". All about codependency. Good luck.
W.
W.
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