LilyMarie

You're in my thoughts, Oly.
I'm sorry you're in such a tough spot, but I'm glad you're in alanon and have support.

lramirez

We are all here to help

Soberwolf

Thinking of you Oly

olyandstreak

Better, home now. Starting up a new life, bettering what I've got. Starting fresh with first step Powerlessness. Saying it is soothing.

olyandstreak

Finally got the alanon book. Jeez, why did that take so long? Yesterday, all day id been feeling good, not great, but at least good but then I finished a terribly sad book, Time Travelers Wife, ugh, and it sent me down down... I actually yelled at my HP! Like really??? Why if you are the one we give everything over to, would you put me/us through this???? If I'm so powerless, and you're in charge would you want this crap to occur???? And I actually felt better, don't know why. I do not feel bad about that mean prayer. At all, maybe my HP needed a good talking to. Lol..... well, slept nine hours with no dreams and am happy to be reading posts and my book before I go run with a new friend. I'll not yell at HP anymore(i hope) it's just that I think he and I needed to get some stuff straight. Feels like it may be easier to hand stuff over now. Powerlessness, it keeps me going. Thanks for listening.

olyandstreak

Oh so much better. Doing my steps religiously and in two meetings. Sponsor, and volunteering at the main center for both AA and Alanon. Feels good to be proactive and the serenity is flowing from accepting my HP, giving it all over to him. Peace, finally. Not any anxiety, but a bit of sad. That will pass too. I refuse to allow this to undo me. Screw that. Working hard and see no reason to stop. Thanks for listening.