dunkelheit

Hi everyone,

I'm debating on adopting a new dog to help with my depression, and give me motivation not to continue with my drinking/drug habit. I haven't really left the house in over a year, and having a new dog would be a nice incentive to go out walking, or hiking every day. I genuinely want a new dog because I haven't owned one in 3 years. Plus, it would make me feel good to know I gave a home to another animal that's also had to stay at a shelter for a bit.

Anyone else try adopting a new pet to help with their underlying problems? Did it work?

Thanks,

Selene

TroyW

I have two dogs myself, and without question they've helped me out more than I realize. I never got them with the intent of helping me emotionally, but I can easily say they have.

One was because my next door neighbor had a litter, so I took one of them. Then the other guy is because my ex's little brother showed up at the house one morning with a plastic container filled with eight 3 week old pups. Basically just came in, "hey guys, look! I got puppies!"

So off I went and bought all the stores in the area out of milk, and we nursed them up to 8 weeks old, then gave as many away as we could. Boxer turned out to be the ugly duckling nobody wanted, so I kept him.

But yeah, without question dogs help with things such as depression, so if you're up for taking care of one, I'd highly encourage it.

EDIT: Bonus advantage is they make excellent security guards, so you sleep well at night knowing if anyone tries to break in, you'll be alerted before they even make it to the door.

Dee74

in your last thread you said you were homeless and possibly facing criminal charges. Has that changed now?

D

Hawk07

Having a pet can be very enriching to ones life. Keep in mind though the commitment it involves taking on a pet. I have a dog and she's a wonderful companion and makes me so happy but sometimes it's almost like having a toddler. Most dogs have a life span of 10-15 yrs. They can be costly and depend on you for everything. Daily walks, food, play and entertainment, yearly vet visits. More food for thought.

dunkelheit

I'm pretty sure if they were going to press charges, they would have done so by now. I've been in a lot of physical confrontations with my ex. He's strangled me to the point of passing out, dislocated my jaw, beaten me with a metal pole, and used bruiseless torture methods on me before, so don't feel too sorry for him. I have a place to stay now because my dad hooked me up.

I just haven't had the motivation to do anything. I stare at the wall and try to zone out as much as possible. I recently graduated with straight A's, but I'm too messed-up right now to even look for work. I should be happy that I have my B.Sc now, but I've turned down a job offer because it's in a farming village, and I'm afraid of staring at walls. I'm staring at walls here, I stared at walls for a year and a half in the mental hospital, stared at walls at the farm. I've already lost interest in everything I was interested in previously, so reading about work-related subjects won't be happening. I have a box of pamphlets here for my charity work, which I won't be doing because I don't feel like talking to people about it.

I think I need a friend. And I can't keep human friends, so that friend will have to be a non-human animal, or an inanimate object, or something imaginary. I see dogs on people's profile pictures, and it makes me wish I had a dog again.

I can afford a dog if I could afford drinking and drugs. I kind of wish I'd thought of that before the drinking and drugs started, because then my life now wouldn't be so dark.

Dee74

It's your call Dunkleheit.

Getting sober for someone or something never worked for me tho.
I have to be honest - I just know that I was never a very good or responsible pet owner when I was drinking, and 20 years later that still haunts me.

If you're sure that your drinking days are behind, thats great - but if you're not sure....I'd maybe hold off on the pet.

D

emme99

I have a dog and I can tell you they are amazing at providing unconditional love. Please keep in mind that they require a lot of care and attention. I battle depression as well and sometimes it is all I can do to make sure she is let outside at least 4-5 times each day and has fresh food & water at all times. My dog is a rescue and I love her (and my cats) more than I can even express but it can be difficult to provide even the most basic care when I am having trouble getting out of bed at times. I do it though, I would never neglect her or let her suffer, or my cats. Dogs are the best and definitely worth it if you can take care of them properly. Wishing you the best whatever you decide

TroyW

I don't know if I should post this or not. From reading your other threads, are you confident you'd never physically harm the dog like you do your partner? Dogs are defenceless against a human, especially their owner, eh?

For me, regardless of emotional state, it's an impossibility. At worst, they'll get a light smack on the head once in while when they're being sh!theads. That's done for emotional pain though, not physical. They need their boundaries.

Then as others have said, for me at least, first 1.5 years was a bit of a handful. After that, they're really easy to take care of, but do require you to be around nearly 24x7. You know, I can't just take off for the weekend, or even a full night for that matter.

emme99

I thought about this as well. Personally, no matter how bad whatever it is I am going through got or however drunk I may get, I would never physically harm another person or animal. Just want to make sure you feel the same about a dog as they are unable to defend themselves against their human

dunkelheit

I am only violent in situations involving people. I'm not a complete psycho, I donated my life to wildlife conservation and research.

Hawk07

I'd make sure your drinking days are behind you before you get a dog... I only say this from my experience. I've had my dog for about ten years now..I'm about 9 months sober. The first few years were great until my drinking got way out of control. I will feel guilty until the day I die about what she went through for almost two years of her life when I was getting to my worst with the drinking. Sure I let her outside and made sure she had fresh food and water. I was never violent. But she was alone. She rarely had any walks or adventures and hardly any interaction. Sitting inside by herself day in and day out. I was too messed up to give her the attention she deserved most of the time. I can only imagine how depressing that was for her.
This is just a suggestion but what about a fish tank? I had fish as pets growing up and it was fascinating learning how to care for them. Getting the ph just right in the water, decorating the tanks and the best part was just watching them and getting to know their little personalities. There are so many to choose from too.

Anna

I think rescuing an animal from a shelter is a great thing to do.

I have one reservation. I know the climate in the area you live, and going out walking with a dog in brutal winter weather, multiple times a day, is very different from a walk on a lovely summer day.

ScottFromWI

I'd think this through first Dunkelheit, coming here to run it by SR is a good idea.

Seeing pictures of other people with dogs is a lot different than having one yourself and having to deal with all the daily responsibilities of owning one. It's not just the cost of purchasing/rescuing a dog, but you have to buy food, pay vet bills for shots/checkups, maybe grooming, etc.

Do you have a humane society locally? What about volunteering there for a time and helping to take care of the animals at the shelter?

PennyLane76

Hi Selene, Animals are innocent pure beings who depend on us for everything. Please make sure you are at a spot in your life where you can afford a dog (vet bills can be very high), where you can give the dog TIME and attention and not be involved in drama, and most importantly that you would NOT abandon the dog if your situation changed? Ex... Oh I have to move, can't take dog, oh I have a new partner doesn't like the dog, oh I have decided I don't have time, etc etc. Animals know more than most give them credit for and being in animal rescue I have heard every lame excuse for abandoning a pet (ummmm 16 year old cat adopted as kitten because they want a certain apartment with ocean view that won't accept cats?, said cat was taken in by my rescue and suffered deep depression ) Not saying you would do these things, but I deal with abandoned pets on a daily basis and it sucks. They mourn. So just please make sure you are able to provide a LIFELONG stable environment for the dog, it should be no different than planning for and providing for a child. Also please think of what you can offer the dog also rather than what the dog can offer you. Not trying to be harsh, just things to think about long and hard before this decision. Do want to thank you for specifying shelter dog!! Add up costs of flea, heart worm , tick treatment, good quality food, vaccinations, grooming if necessary, dental cleanings, yearly exam, beds, toys, etc also before deciding.

PennyLane76

Excellent idea Scott!!!

doggonecarl

Our animal companions aren't here to fix our problems.

I work with a canine rescue organization. My group wouldn't let you adopt a dog if we knew what your situation was.

Address your problems, establish some stability in your life, get and stay sober, then think about a pet.

In the meantime, volunteering at an animal shelter, which someone already suggested, gets my support 1000%

ElleDee

Take DGCarl's advice! Please! You need to take care of yourself FIRST before you can take care of an animal that will be fully dependent on you for his every need.

Aellyce

^This!!

Or an alternative: there are many people looking for dog sitters or just someone to walk the dog when they cannot. Usually they are also offering compensation for it. That might be a possibility for you to get to know a specific dog (or a few) well in the context of their normal home. I did something like this (minus the compensation since it was always a good friend) for quite a long time in a few different environments when I was not in the position to own a pet due to my lifestyle, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Soberwolf

I've had dogs cats rabbits fish birds

If you are thinking about this 2 things !

1.finances to cover a dog for medical, grooming & obviously food & water/milk

2. and this is the one to really think about ... have you got time to devote to the dog if you have and you have space then yes but if you don't have time & space the dog suffers & it comes under cruelty

My rottweiler the dog I had last (I have an adopted Jack Russell) was a rescue dog
it had been treated so badly when I picked him up he was skin & bones

he always hid under beds and you could tell he had been treated badly

I still have his neck collar

Point im making is can you look after this dog long term because the dogs gonna need you

Reset

Just make sure that you're being fair to the dog. I wouldn't use it as a crutch to stay sober. It's a living, sentient being and needs to be treated right, which means a real commitment on your part to training, walking, feeding, vet visits, general attention giving, and more.

If you're not ready to do all of that, the dog's just going to be one more problem.

But if you're honestly prepared to do all of that, great. Dogs are amazing and will probably make you happier.