What if we haven't hit rock bottom?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Congrats on 39 days. That's great!
I'll agree that this disease is progressive and rock bottom is the grave. Since I'm typing, I know I didn't hit rock bottom, but I also know if I didn't stop digging when I did I would be way closer to the grave today.
Stay strong, you won't regret the decision to make your life better by not drinking
I'll agree that this disease is progressive and rock bottom is the grave. Since I'm typing, I know I didn't hit rock bottom, but I also know if I didn't stop digging when I did I would be way closer to the grave today.
Stay strong, you won't regret the decision to make your life better by not drinking
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
I will be two years sober this month. Honestly, when I look at the list of embarrassing, dangerous, stupid, shameful things that I did when I was drunk, you would think any one of those could have been my "bottom." However, it was honestly watching my mother spiral downward into her alcoholism that caused "my bottom." In fact, when I quit, I had already cut down a lot on my drinking and hadn't had a major "drunken episode" in several months. And in my whole drinking career, I never had a DUI, or marital issues or trouble with the law. I guess I was just playing the tape forward by experiencing, first hand, my mother's abyss in her full blown alcoholism. And I have been extremely candid with my children, ages ranging from 19-11. They have alcoholics on both sides of the family, so I am doing everything in my power to help keep them away from the destructive path of alcoholism.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 321
Though I didn't hit rock bottom....I was hovering close. I heard someone say or read somewhere that alcoholism is like an elevator and you can get off anytime before the bottom floor. I think for many years I was stuck on different floors, up and down, always confused about what floor I was on, depending on the day/week.....but that last few years I definitely was on floors 1 or 2 constantly. I finally just had enough of living that way and got the hell off!
Stand and Be True
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 120
Rock Bottom does not have to be some dramatic event. A car crash, relationship break up, health issue etc. I've been through all of that and though most non-alcoholics would think these are the perfect times to say enough is enough, well we know that's not quite how it works.
I look at it this way - when you're drinking you're constantly going deeper and deeper. Regardless of the magnitude of the negative consequences, you are still going deeper into the pit. Therefore, at any given time you are at your Rock Bottom.
I kind of like the fact that after years of almost always drinking until blackout, my last night of drinking involved a couple of cans of Guinness in my room on my own. My drinking life died with a whimper rather than a bang. It feels like a small victory over alcohol for me.
Don't ever worry that you haven't hit your bottom yet.
I look at it this way - when you're drinking you're constantly going deeper and deeper. Regardless of the magnitude of the negative consequences, you are still going deeper into the pit. Therefore, at any given time you are at your Rock Bottom.
I kind of like the fact that after years of almost always drinking until blackout, my last night of drinking involved a couple of cans of Guinness in my room on my own. My drinking life died with a whimper rather than a bang. It feels like a small victory over alcohol for me.
Don't ever worry that you haven't hit your bottom yet.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 831
I agree that rock bottom is a myth. I've seen plenty of people that just decided enough is enough and get into recovery before a major catastrophe. I've also seen people who were incarcerated for years go immediately out to get drunk or high, even though getting caught meant going back to prison. I've seen people hospitalized for liver failure beg for a drink.
I've also heard that the bottom is when you stop digging. There might be an elevator to the bottom and you can get off on any floor going down, but in recovery there is no elevator going up. We have to take the steps. (Cheesy I know) they don't necessarily have to be the 12 Steps, but there isn't a quick and easy way out. Abstaining is the first step, but there's still a lot of climbing to do.
I've also heard that the bottom is when you stop digging. There might be an elevator to the bottom and you can get off on any floor going down, but in recovery there is no elevator going up. We have to take the steps. (Cheesy I know) they don't necessarily have to be the 12 Steps, but there isn't a quick and easy way out. Abstaining is the first step, but there's still a lot of climbing to do.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Bellamiaa 
I've read a lot of posts from people saying that hitting rock bottom made them quit drinking. That isn't the case for me. I just woke up one day and my switch was flipped, so to speak, and I was done. However, this now scares me. Has this happened to a lot of people? I don't want to be negative at all I'm just worried the done feeling may go away. 39 days today 
xo
xo
some of us are just more stubborn than others.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Posts: 196
Originally Posted by DoubleDragons
I will be two years sober this month. Honestly, when I look at the list of embarrassing, dangerous, stupid, shameful things that I did when I was drunk, you would think any one of those could have been my "bottom." However, it was honestly watching my mother spiral downward into her alcoholism that caused "my bottom." In fact, when I quit, I had already cut down a lot on my drinking and hadn't had a major "drunken episode" in several months. And in my whole drinking career, I never had a DUI, or marital issues or trouble with the law. I guess I was just playing the tape forward by experiencing, first hand, my mother's abyss in her full blown alcoholism. And I have been extremely candid with my children, ages ranging from 19-11. They have alcoholics on both sides of the family, so I am doing everything in my power to help keep them away from the destructive path of alcoholism.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Bella,
after three decades of drinking and a gazillion tries to quit and stay quit, i just woke up one day to the fact that i didn't have a problem with alcohol, i was a drunk!
i was a drunk!
i literally woke up to that and in that moment the switch flipped to "off".
the obsession has not returned.
years later, i can tell you that this hasn't meant i didn't have urges or that i didn't need peers or didn't need to change my life...i had to do all those things. and keep doing it.
because after the flipped switch, i was left with "the rest of it", and "the rest of it" has the potential to flip that switch the other way.
okay, those are generalized shortcut ways of saying something.
but yeah, a flipped switch hasn't meant or translated into letting up on action.
and rock bottom?
rock bottom was where i found the solid rock to stand on: i'm an alcoholic.
that's the rock i needed to get to for the turnaround to .
after three decades of drinking and a gazillion tries to quit and stay quit, i just woke up one day to the fact that i didn't have a problem with alcohol, i was a drunk!
i was a drunk!
i literally woke up to that and in that moment the switch flipped to "off".
the obsession has not returned.
years later, i can tell you that this hasn't meant i didn't have urges or that i didn't need peers or didn't need to change my life...i had to do all those things. and keep doing it.
because after the flipped switch, i was left with "the rest of it", and "the rest of it" has the potential to flip that switch the other way.
okay, those are generalized shortcut ways of saying something.
but yeah, a flipped switch hasn't meant or translated into letting up on action.
and rock bottom?
rock bottom was where i found the solid rock to stand on: i'm an alcoholic.
that's the rock i needed to get to for the turnaround to .
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 1,042
everybody's circumstances will be different, there's lots of us who were still holding down a job (badly in my case), still functioning to the outside world and still with a few quid in the bank.
In my case I felt my drinking was out of control and had been for way too long, I was also fortunate to be able to see and be scared of where I was clearly headed .
39 days is fantastic, it's all good, whatever place we started from.
good luck!
In my case I felt my drinking was out of control and had been for way too long, I was also fortunate to be able to see and be scared of where I was clearly headed .
39 days is fantastic, it's all good, whatever place we started from.
good luck!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 507
So encouraging to read other people in a similar situation. I still find it hard to completely shake that AV telling me that I don't really have a drinking problem. That I've quite for no reason. That I shouldn't be reading or posting on a board for alcoholics because that isn't what I am.
And that's probably because thinking about it more, I started my path to sobriety a few years ago after a particularly awful New Years Eve that I still feel ashamed about. Gradually cutting down my weekly totals. So when I finally made the decision to stop about 3 months ago, it wasn't from rock bottom. Many people were surprised by it. But I need to remind myself that I had a black out as recently as February. That's not exactly ancient history.
So I think it's very important to take away this idea that you need to be passed out in a gutter to justify quitting. It's simply the best decision anyone can take. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
And that's probably because thinking about it more, I started my path to sobriety a few years ago after a particularly awful New Years Eve that I still feel ashamed about. Gradually cutting down my weekly totals. So when I finally made the decision to stop about 3 months ago, it wasn't from rock bottom. Many people were surprised by it. But I need to remind myself that I had a black out as recently as February. That's not exactly ancient history.
So I think it's very important to take away this idea that you need to be passed out in a gutter to justify quitting. It's simply the best decision anyone can take. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 185
Originally Posted by OpenTuning
So encouraging to read other people in a similar situation. I still find it hard to completely shake that AV telling me that I don't really have a drinking problem. That I've quite for no reason. That I shouldn't be reading or posting on a board for alcoholics because that isn't what I am.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: CO, USA
Posts: 145
Fantastic thread!
Like others, my bottom wasn't a catastrophic event... just a series of mistakes and disappointments and a growing sense that 1) my health was starting to suffer and 2) I wasn't living my life as I who I truly wanted to be. I think the latter was huge for me. I always had big aspirations and things I wanted to accomplish in different parts of my life-- professionally, socially, spiritually. My bottom was when I really realized that I could not really accomplish those things as long as I continued to drink!
Congrats OP on your wonderful progress!
Like others, my bottom wasn't a catastrophic event... just a series of mistakes and disappointments and a growing sense that 1) my health was starting to suffer and 2) I wasn't living my life as I who I truly wanted to be. I think the latter was huge for me. I always had big aspirations and things I wanted to accomplish in different parts of my life-- professionally, socially, spiritually. My bottom was when I really realized that I could not really accomplish those things as long as I continued to drink!
Congrats OP on your wonderful progress!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 185
Originally Posted by N3p3nth3
Fantastic thread! Like others, my bottom wasn't a catastrophic event... just a series of mistakes and disappointments and a growing sense that 1) my health was starting to suffer and 2) I wasn't living my life as I who I truly wanted to be. I think the latter was huge for me. I always had big aspirations and things I wanted to accomplish in different parts of my life-- professionally, socially, spiritually. My bottom was when I really realized that I could not really accomplish those things as long as I continued to drink! Congrats OP on your wonderful progress!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: QLD
Posts: 173
I had a few real rock bottoms. None of them made me quit. I knew for years it was out of control and I did nothing. I was always waiting for that moment when my brain would finally say to me 'it's time to stop, we've had enough'.
I waited year after year, my kids got older, my guilt and shame grew along with them,I kept saying to my ex 'we need to stop'....and yet I didn't.
Then one day, 22 days ago to be exact, I woke up hungover and decided I had just had ebloodynough. I was tired of waiting for that lightbulb moment. Or maybe that was finally my lightbulb moment, I don't know....I just knew I was done.
I waited year after year, my kids got older, my guilt and shame grew along with them,I kept saying to my ex 'we need to stop'....and yet I didn't.
Then one day, 22 days ago to be exact, I woke up hungover and decided I had just had ebloodynough. I was tired of waiting for that lightbulb moment. Or maybe that was finally my lightbulb moment, I don't know....I just knew I was done.
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Actually, I've pretty much stopped saying I've "hit bottom" because so many people, including myself, have seen me quit and start drinking again so many times, no one believes me anymore. And then I find myself always on the defensive. "No, I really mean it this time! It's different now!" There's always a lower rung, until you breathe your last breath. That's the bottom of the ladder. All I can do is continue what I'm doing, a day at a time. It was a day at a time that I became an addict. I can't live sober any faster. Time will pass and I think (hope) people who know my past will finally be able to trust and have some confidence in me again. Only time will tell.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 561
Originally Posted by N3p3nth3
Fantastic thread!
Like others, my bottom wasn't a catastrophic event... just a series of mistakes and disappointments and a growing sense that 1) my health was starting to suffer and 2) I wasn't living my life as I who I truly wanted to be. I think the latter was huge for me. I always had big aspirations and things I wanted to accomplish in different parts of my life-- professionally, socially, spiritually. My bottom was when I really realized that I could not really accomplish those things as long as I continued to drink!
Congrats OP on your wonderful progress!
Like others, my bottom wasn't a catastrophic event... just a series of mistakes and disappointments and a growing sense that 1) my health was starting to suffer and 2) I wasn't living my life as I who I truly wanted to be. I think the latter was huge for me. I always had big aspirations and things I wanted to accomplish in different parts of my life-- professionally, socially, spiritually. My bottom was when I really realized that I could not really accomplish those things as long as I continued to drink!
Congrats OP on your wonderful progress!
The above is exactly how I feel!! #2 to be exact: I wasn't living the life I want to live.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 561
My drinking was ruining my life but it hadnt taken my job, friends, family, and no trouble with the law....
But....
My heart was broken. I was breaking my heart daily. ....with the self abuse of drinking. I knew I had to quit. My God lead me to quit. I quit for 1.5 years.
But other people believed I wasn't an alcoholic. I let the addictive voice and the voices of other people convince me I'm not an alcoholic. .....because deep down I wanted to be convinced I could drink again.
I drank again. I ended up back to the same place. Alcohol taking up waaay too much space in my mind and life. It was unmanageable.
Then I had a revelation that I don't have to KNOW I'm an alcoholic to stop drinking. This was the game changing moment.
I was getting hung up on analysis: do i meet the "criteria" and am i really an addict? The analysis actually opened the door for addictive voice to lead me to relapse.
The relapse helped reassure me what my heart and my God knew all along: I need alcohol out of my life completely.
P.s. I'm definitely an alcoholic. But I'd still quit the stuff even if I wasnt! The alcohol free life is true freedom!
But....
My heart was broken. I was breaking my heart daily. ....with the self abuse of drinking. I knew I had to quit. My God lead me to quit. I quit for 1.5 years.
But other people believed I wasn't an alcoholic. I let the addictive voice and the voices of other people convince me I'm not an alcoholic. .....because deep down I wanted to be convinced I could drink again.
I drank again. I ended up back to the same place. Alcohol taking up waaay too much space in my mind and life. It was unmanageable.
Then I had a revelation that I don't have to KNOW I'm an alcoholic to stop drinking. This was the game changing moment.
I was getting hung up on analysis: do i meet the "criteria" and am i really an addict? The analysis actually opened the door for addictive voice to lead me to relapse.
The relapse helped reassure me what my heart and my God knew all along: I need alcohol out of my life completely.
P.s. I'm definitely an alcoholic. But I'd still quit the stuff even if I wasnt! The alcohol free life is true freedom!
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