Forgive yourself Weekender Thread Aug. 28th until..
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
I'm in. Could have, should've, would have. The sense of shame and frustration over any number of things I've done or failed to do. I find lately my biggest source of guilt is in managing my time. There's not enough of it.
Thank you Kamm for the headspace suggestion. I have to make more space in mine.
Otherwise, my head is like the hummingbird which is currently visiting my yard as I type.
Thank you Kamm for the headspace suggestion. I have to make more space in mine.
Otherwise, my head is like the hummingbird which is currently visiting my yard as I type.
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Think I'll ride roof with wolfie awhile....I could use some fresh air!
Good theme, Ken, and something I struggle with a lot. I think it's time for me to take some steps forward in this department.
Happy Thursday y'all!
Good theme, Ken, and something I struggle with a lot. I think it's time for me to take some steps forward in this department.
Happy Thursday y'all!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
I just discovered that I think I have almost every original led zeppelin album.
and who has a commander cody and his lost planet airman first album? ME.
Can't wait to inventory the albums I just got my hands on.
time to get off the computer and clean the kitchen - I keep forgetting that I am a housewife now.
and who has a commander cody and his lost planet airman first album? ME.
Can't wait to inventory the albums I just got my hands on.
time to get off the computer and clean the kitchen - I keep forgetting that I am a housewife now.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 259
Great post!! Guilt is such an obstacle for me. In the past or made the cycle keep going which is crazy because the behavior just made more guilt!! It's so much easier for me to forgive others than myself. I am in for this weekend too! Thanks again for the wonderful post!!
Lilly
Lilly
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: milwaukee wi
Posts: 3,574
this is so true... love to all ardy
Originally Posted by Weasel1966 
Hell yes I would beat myself silly every morning. EVERY morning. Make that list of promises. Ask for strength. Set out firm in my belief I could do it. I just needed another chance. Till 3 pm came around. The bargaining time had arrived. What would I trade for my fix today? It was always the same. Another chip from my soul. Plunked down on the bar with one hand as I picked up the glass with the other. Hardly a fair trade.
What could I do to help myself? I learned so very much from SR about what to do. A loud collective voice rang in my head after every post of yet another failure to stay sober.
"Forgive yourself."
If you allow yourself to feel guilty, you will reinforce the error rather than allow it to be undone. Move past it.
The people here have helped me realize that a softer touch is the best approach to moving past myself.
So how about our newest? or anyone really... Take this next 48 hours to do nothing but forgive yourself. If you are like me you will need to do it over and over and over as each new thought rears its ugly head.
Forgiving yourself takes practice. Real efforts. So focusing on that for a period can help train your sober mind!
*Ring Ring*
Can you hear it? I can! Your sober weekend of forgiveness is here! Jump on a bus and go easy on yourself! Enjoy the ride!!!
Ken
What could I do to help myself? I learned so very much from SR about what to do. A loud collective voice rang in my head after every post of yet another failure to stay sober.
"Forgive yourself."
If you allow yourself to feel guilty, you will reinforce the error rather than allow it to be undone. Move past it.
The people here have helped me realize that a softer touch is the best approach to moving past myself.
So how about our newest? or anyone really... Take this next 48 hours to do nothing but forgive yourself. If you are like me you will need to do it over and over and over as each new thought rears its ugly head.
Forgiving yourself takes practice. Real efforts. So focusing on that for a period can help train your sober mind!
*Ring Ring*
Can you hear it? I can! Your sober weekend of forgiveness is here! Jump on a bus and go easy on yourself! Enjoy the ride!!!
Ken
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
Forgiveness. I, too, always have found it much easier to forgive others than myself. It's second nature to me to forgive others. So why is it so hard to forgive myself? I think my perfectionism has something to do with it. The bar is set so high for myself in my mind. So any mistake or poor behavior weighs heavily on me. I beat myself up most of my life, and it's a habit. One I'm trying hard to break now. I just try to live every day doing my best - and if I don't, I try to quickly forgive myself, realizing I'm only human. I give others leeway, so I can give myself some, too. Yes, the transgressions of the past still pop up and slap me in the face. But I tell myself the drunk stupid days are over, and all I can do now is make amends and go from here. One day at a time.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: usa
Posts: 3,938
I'm in! And looking forward to a sober weekend.
Great theme, Ken....I'm also my own worst enemy regarding mistakes I've made in the past.many when I was sober the last time, also.Louise Hay says (in You Can Heal Your Life) all we need is the willingness to forgive ourselves and it will happen. Today I am trying to be the best person I can be. I can't change the past, but I can make sure that the present and future is something I can be proud of. At least give it my best effort.
Well, in the meantime, 2 more days of work before the weekend begins for me. It looks like a beautiful day for a morning walk. See you all later. I'd love to continue the conversation about forgiving ourselves.
Great theme, Ken....I'm also my own worst enemy regarding mistakes I've made in the past.many when I was sober the last time, also.Louise Hay says (in You Can Heal Your Life) all we need is the willingness to forgive ourselves and it will happen. Today I am trying to be the best person I can be. I can't change the past, but I can make sure that the present and future is something I can be proud of. At least give it my best effort.
Well, in the meantime, 2 more days of work before the weekend begins for me. It looks like a beautiful day for a morning walk. See you all later. I'd love to continue the conversation about forgiving ourselves.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Domhan
Posts: 1,974
Well said MLD!
Spent the morning cleaning the Behan barn. Like LBrain, I am a handsome housewife today. Next, trim my beard and have a long shower. Heading to my home town this evening, have a work thing there tomorrow. Mrs B is taking a rain check due to fatigue.
Interesting article on self forgiveness, some parts a bit cringy.
http://psychcentral.com/lib/how-do-y...give-yourself/
Right, some loud Soulfly.
B
Spent the morning cleaning the Behan barn. Like LBrain, I am a handsome housewife today. Next, trim my beard and have a long shower. Heading to my home town this evening, have a work thing there tomorrow. Mrs B is taking a rain check due to fatigue.
Interesting article on self forgiveness, some parts a bit cringy.
http://psychcentral.com/lib/how-do-y...give-yourself/
Right, some loud Soulfly.
B
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
That's a great article, Behan. Lots of good ideas there. AA talks about a lot of this stuff - I go to a women's group where guilt, remorse, shame, and forgiveness are common topics. It does help to share these feelings with others - realizing you are not alone in those feelings. I like the idea of writing, too. I always say I'm going to - haven't done much of it.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,474
Rain Showers. Clouds. Moving Fog. Smells of Rain; Dirt; Sage, and Damp Dog. Oh, and whatever dried Horse Poop Mixture they put into the hanging Fly Trap we use to nab them. Oatmeal & Dried Cranberries for Breakfast.
Da Wife just called while driving out to Pilates, and saw that our crazy Drunk Neighbor is in the House. The one that emptied a 10 Bullet Clip in 'my general direction' ~1 Decade ago to signal us re: who's really Boss up here on this Mesa.
Turns out that he's got Security Cameras wired up, according to a Telecom Tech Guy I spoke with yesterday who didn't realize what he was disclosing. I was just asking about the 'Net Service my Neighbors realize up here. The good news is that these Cameras allow Nutso Boy to stay elsewhere while Hammered. He can play Night Watchman - all he is - while thinking he owns a Spread he actually does not. Yah, whatever...
5 DUIs have slowed him down just a bit. He beat a 6th one down the Rural Block on a Technicality. We go on 'Yellow Alert' Status when he first Bonds out of Jail, as he did just this week. The schitte I learn on the Internet... Legal Infraction unknown, but I'm confident it's Booze-related. Mebbe driving w/o a License & Insurance while Hammered; his default Behavior.
I think I'm finally up to finishing the install on the Draperies From Hell, so that'll keep me outta Jail while mucking with that way-too-complex Designer Project.
These days, I focus and give what I'm doing my best shot. This tends to allow skipping any Remorse, but is an imperfect Strategy. The Inner Perfectionist often wants attention. I pretend I'm married to it, and don't listen. Besides, I gotta get busy planning my next RV Trailer Trip.
Thursday Funk to - hopefully - evaporate any Thursday Funk...
- 'Get Down To The Pumped Up Funk' ~ Skewiff -
.
Da Wife just called while driving out to Pilates, and saw that our crazy Drunk Neighbor is in the House. The one that emptied a 10 Bullet Clip in 'my general direction' ~1 Decade ago to signal us re: who's really Boss up here on this Mesa.
Turns out that he's got Security Cameras wired up, according to a Telecom Tech Guy I spoke with yesterday who didn't realize what he was disclosing. I was just asking about the 'Net Service my Neighbors realize up here. The good news is that these Cameras allow Nutso Boy to stay elsewhere while Hammered. He can play Night Watchman - all he is - while thinking he owns a Spread he actually does not. Yah, whatever...
5 DUIs have slowed him down just a bit. He beat a 6th one down the Rural Block on a Technicality. We go on 'Yellow Alert' Status when he first Bonds out of Jail, as he did just this week. The schitte I learn on the Internet... Legal Infraction unknown, but I'm confident it's Booze-related. Mebbe driving w/o a License & Insurance while Hammered; his default Behavior.
I think I'm finally up to finishing the install on the Draperies From Hell, so that'll keep me outta Jail while mucking with that way-too-complex Designer Project.
These days, I focus and give what I'm doing my best shot. This tends to allow skipping any Remorse, but is an imperfect Strategy. The Inner Perfectionist often wants attention. I pretend I'm married to it, and don't listen. Besides, I gotta get busy planning my next RV Trailer Trip.
Thursday Funk to - hopefully - evaporate any Thursday Funk...
- 'Get Down To The Pumped Up Funk' ~ Skewiff -
.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
I'm and on the roof with SW and Lbrain. The temps have dropped about 5 degrees where I'm at and I'm ready for fall weather... the roof is the place to be!
Awesome theme Ken. It takes a strong person to forgive and a stronger person to forgive yourself. One more tool to help with the ultimate goal... staying sober today.
Awesome theme Ken. It takes a strong person to forgive and a stronger person to forgive yourself. One more tool to help with the ultimate goal... staying sober today.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
It's the 3 amigos on the roof woot woot
Mesa that picture is beautiful are you a pro photographer ? Really awesome pics
My neice is coming to stay for 2 nights after next week then again the week after #Awesomeness
Therapy went excellent today my blisters are nearly healed and its lamb chops for dinner I've downloaded so much good music today
Mrs sw is getting pampered tonight backrubs footrubs cuddles kisses and a tea whenever she wants
A very well balanced day sun is shining the last 2 days of heavy rain are a distant memory
Thank you Ken this thread is awesome
Mesa that picture is beautiful are you a pro photographer ? Really awesome pics
My neice is coming to stay for 2 nights after next week then again the week after #Awesomeness
Therapy went excellent today my blisters are nearly healed and its lamb chops for dinner I've downloaded so much good music today
Mrs sw is getting pampered tonight backrubs footrubs cuddles kisses and a tea whenever she wants
A very well balanced day sun is shining the last 2 days of heavy rain are a distant memory
Thank you Ken this thread is awesome
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
