Tetra: trust your gut and never ask for permission to treat yourself well. Good on you! Venecia: I do like the chair. I covet the chair. |
I'm finding the nights harder to bear when I can't sleep. I feel so lonely. I used to be perfectly content with a good book and my own company. In fact I preferred it that way. But these days I find myself longing for something more. |
Hey Tetra I know what you mean. I like to think of that feeling as my mind and body's way to tell me I'm ready to push myself just a little further along this great journey we are all on. Try and rest into the uneasiness, if that makes sense. This is a long term play not a short one. Go easy on yourself. |
Love the furniture venecia- Tetra...you are doing great. You are feeling your feelings and you are coping. It might be a painful time for you, but you will get through it. I'm exhausted...I dI'd lots of yardwork...after a very good day, I'm happy to be lying down and watching old law and order episodes. ..nothing else on. |
1 Attachment(s) . Puppy Pic to fix about anything what ails ya... . |
Success I faced down a big challenge today. Did a bicycle ride with a group of nice folks to a spot 35 miles away where there was swimming, camping and lots of beer. I hung for a few hours sunbathing and drinking fizzy water, then biked the 35 miles back into town solo. Everyone else stayed behind to camp or planned to catch a ride back in a friend's pickup truck. I decided in advance when and how to leave on my terms to avoid temptation. It was hard to leave but everyone was surprisingly okay with it without my even explaining why. No-one tried to force a beer down my throat, no one teased me for being a lone wolf. There were definitely a few moments where I felt sad that I couldn't drink like everyone else, where the AV said "c'mon, it's a special occasion" but in the end I managed to show up, I didn't drink, and I didn't hurt anyone's feelings. And I DID just go to Waffle House for a waffle with sausage and a cup of coffee. :) |
Aww so cute, Mesa! I went shopping and to dinner with a friend today. We hit H & M and Nordstrom Rack....got lots of good bargains!! Mediterranean for dinner then frozen yogurt for desert. My guy is out of detox. I'm keeping my distance for now. Eventually I'm going to gave to go see him. His rehab encourages family to come all day every day to all sessions....weird but true. If I don't go then I'll be the 'unsupportive' one. Blah! Sweet dreams y'all! Xoxo |
Upward....that is awesome! Well done!! :) |
Where's Nons this weekend? We miss you, our financial guru! :) |
I'll tell you what's amazing... A full day of enjoying life without a beer or 'other' liquid to distort the senses. After dinner I discovered we was out of ice cream so I went to get some. I noticed the full moon on the rise with a hazy halo... When I got home I said to the missus, we're going for a ride. I took the tops off the jeep and we headed out. Stopped at an ice cream place for a cone as we sat in a dark field watching the moon. Then finished the drive on roads I've never been - just keep the moon over the right shoulder and I'm heading toward home. Ended up coming back through French Creek. Did a BIG loop on country roads. Got home and spent an hour practice on mando while she is watching scrubs. Decision time... bed or 'scrubs' on the couch? Everyone is doing great this weekend and lots of cool reports coming in. Upward... This morning I showed the wife a photo of me at the Georgia Guide Stones taken last week. I was through your way. Funny thing, I showed her the Russian tablet photo and she said it was definitely written by someone who doesn't understand the Russian language... Had lunch in that eyetalian place in Hartwell - pretty good food. |
Worked today, had a BBQ. Going to have a long shower and play some cards xx |
Hi everyone! Long day and I'm tired. Tetra, you did absolutely the right thing. Don't apologize. You listened to your inner voice of reason and left at just the right time after doing just the right thing. Soberclover, I hope you feel better. It's an adjustment. Hugs! Melina, congrats on 90 days! That's great! My mom has wanted to go to this baseball game that was tonight, forever, because there were fireworks after. She didn't feel comfortable leaving my dad alone. But my aunt and uncle had come in from out of state to see my dad and they said they'd visit with dad while mom went out. This is my mom's sister. So Mr. Ruby, my kids, my nephew and I went with my mom. The fireworks were great. It rained but not too much. People were drinking but I noticed that the people who weren't drinking seemed to be having more fun. Anyway, I had forgotten my phone at my parent's house. Felt naked and defenseless without it. Eek! Won't do that again. Sao, I hope you feel better. I went through that and it stinks. But it did pass. Anyway, I plan on an 8 a.m. meeting, church and then probably stop in to see mom and Dad tomorrow. |
Morning everyone, Up at zero dark thirty this morning Well done upwardspiral, you got to enjoy the best of both worlds there Very wet out this morning |
Morning all, Morning Sao-up very early. A little PAWS still? We are off on a road trip today! We will see where the road takes us. Our plan is to get somewhere to watch the big GAA match today, then find a B&B. Catch you all later, B |
hugs @ soberclover, keep on with the sober routine :You_Rock_ Yogapants , way to go with getting active to shift the funk . A super moon here for the last few days , luna-cy has been happening , maybe thats why i've been feeling out of sorts . The pubs and bars used to go a bit crazy on nights of the full moon . Have been looking at houses to buy a bit , i realise there is a gap between what i want and what mex-m8 wants . Since i was four years old, when i first saw one , i wanted a blue rolls royce silver shadow . For that to happen i need a garage preferably 20ft x 10ft minimum . Here in blackpool you sometimes get old coach houses in your garden so you get a first storey too … Ideal as a music room and painting studio . With both the car and the house i'm projecting into the future a bit, a future that hasn't formed , i do need to start dealing with Mex-m8's expectations though . Certainly if he'd have sold up in london and was willing to add to the kitty i'd pay it some attention , until that happens i'm happy to wait to find the right house for me to appear on the market or stay renting and have the cash on deposit if a certain blue car appears. It's hard enough to find the motivation to go to work to pay for the rubbish i want to be surrounded by , I don't think i could do it for a dream that isn't mine . In this situation i think procrastination is my friend , especially with a potential interest rate rise on the horizon .. Luckily I'm an expert in procrastination :) coffee time , m |
Morning |
I think your be right Behan - at least I know what i'm doing today, I seem to do better when I have direction Good time to buy a Silver Shadow Mecx - they fetch money now and cost a bomb to run but they will appreciate in value (rare 2 door versions look best) Venecia - we have the same colour walls. Red suits my flat in cold winter days more than the summer |
Morning everyone!!! Venecia, I love the room! Very sophisticated! I agree Mr. Nons should say hello. A few people not here or lurking that I care very much about and hope are ok. But we ebb and flow now don't we. His last activity was Monday so let's just hope he is traveling for work or fun. M.... I love that you know boundaries. Your comment that you could not go to work for someone else's dream is interesting to me. My problem is that when I feel committed to someone I tend to go to far. I forget I have needs. Thank goodness I was never a serial monogamist or I would have a possi of ex's I would be tending too instead of just one. The anxiety to go to service this morning is chewing away at me. Also I am super stressed at work. I am officially out of my comfort zone with working with this team in the Netherlands. Dealing with various languages and country rules and new technologies is unsettling to someone who is always on top of things and in the know of what to do next. But I guess I don't grow that way. What I do cling to is that I understand the process and the format to get things done. I am leading that team to revamp their processes to produce better quality products. That I do know. So I focus and stay close to my center. Still scares the crap out of me. I will look back in a few months and see I was right. Don't cower away cuz it's new and challenging. Ugggghhhhh being an adult sucks!!!!!!! anywaazzz.... How to spend this day? I think I need a nice drive north. Oh forget that... Just realized we have one more week of traffic season. Then back to normal. K |
Whoa, looks like I'll have to go back and do some reading. I was traveling for work and fun! I couldn't get the internet to work in my room, though. Maybe I should just get the phone app or something. I am home again and all is well. I had a sort of epiphany the last few days that I want to write about. I think I'll blog it when I compose my thoughts. Hope everyone is having a splendidly sober weekend! |
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