ulfr

I almost picked up today i almost said **** it to 6 months
but my husband stopped me
we where fighting was at the store getting food and we walked into the drinks part of the store where one side is soda and the other side drink
during the fight i picked up a bottle my husband took it off me

he said it wouldnt help
we sorted things out ... av been slacking not going to my AA meeting for a lest a week now
i have to go with out meetings while am at my husbands family
there is going to be drink there
what if i cant stop myself from drinking it i don't want to make things hard for my husband
ill have here but no AA meetings at all

IOAA2

Hi.
Could you just not put yourself into a dangerous situation by not going? Try to remember our soberity come FIRST.

BE WELL

ulfr

i have to go my husband not seen his family in a year plus we have booked a rental car cats in the cattery and payed for other things on top of that
we are in Scotland his family is in Oxford its not like we see them often
if we could stay with someone else we would but we cant afford not to go
we cant afford a hotel

Anna

If you must go with your husband, could you escape to a different part of the house where people are not drinking alcohol? Maybe you could read or watch a movie? And, you can always come here.

ulfr

yes i can sit in the bed room and read
i don't know where they keep the drink but am unlikely to find it
just my husband step dad likes to drink and sometimes he offers us some but my husband always passes so i pass
last years it wasn't an issue
unsure why it is this year maybe because am feeling so low and i haven't self injured in a long time

entropy1964

I'm sorry you're having to face this...but I guess that's life. It helps me to 'play the tape forward'. In other words...think the drink all the way through to the end...the regret, the hangover, the shame. And if you're anything like me, the possibility of making an azz out of yourself When I'm faced with those family situations I try to bring plenty of distractions...books, tablet, crochet (I'm terrible at it but its a great distraction). Can you go for walks and that kind of thing?
Also there are AA meetings online. Maybe check that out. You could tell your hubbie you have a meeting and run off to the bedroom to chat and get some alone time?

Ruby2

Aum, hang in there. I imagine that there are meetings in Oxford if you're comfortable attending? Otherwise, the suggestion of going to a quiet part of the house is a good one. Sometimes I need to get away to a quiet place too. You're doing great, even if you're not feeling it right now. You came here. Peace.

ReadyAtLast

Have a plan Aum. I remember entertaining one Christmas at 2 weeks sober when everyone else was drinking. I went to my room and logged on SR. I led down if i needed to rest.No one minded-no one even noticed!! I broke the day down into segments- It wasn't a day it was just a few hours.

Urge surfing worked wonders too. You can do this Congrats on 6 months- don't throw it away

Urge Surfing – Relapse Prevention – Mindfulness

Berrybean

There will be AA meetings in Oxford.

It sounds to me like your AV is sneakily nibbling away at your resolve. Look up meetings in Oxford. There are lots Find a Meeting | AA Meetings | Alcoholics Anonymous (Great Britain) Ltd (If you just put in Oxford it'll come up with any that are in places like Oxford Street in London as well, which is confusing. If you put in 'Oxford OX1' it'll narrow it down better). It sounds like your husband is on side, so hopefully he'll help you get to some. My partner walked to the door with me for the one I went to as a visitor in Barnstaple on holiday recently. I don't usually ask him to do things like that, but I knew that I'd be nervous and fear might get the better of me.

Have you got a sponsor yet? If so, then regular phone conversations should help.

I have a little (cheap as chips) MP3 player that I download AA speakers on to so that I can have a little top up off AA any time I need to. There are sites where these are free to download , like here... 5500+ AA Speaker Tapes - Organized & Mobile-Friendly!

A wobble when you thought you'd got some confidence going always shakes us up more than it did at the beginning of our journey. In some ways a wobble is a good reminder though - a reminder that the pilot light never goes out. We're always still, at the end of the day, alcoholic. I know that I cannot afford the luxury of being defeatist. I have my tools, and I NEED to keep using them. Meetings; Step Work; Daily prayer and meditation; contact with other AAers; Helping others; Service work in meetings... I need it ALL. Complacency is a dangerous thing, and it's the door that our AV sneaks in through much of the time.

Please chat to your sponsor about all this as well so that she can give you some local support x