MilitiARGH

Hey there.
Looking to tone down, not quit.
However I think the best way to start is with complete abstinence, for a while. I'm aiming for 3 months and then re-evaluate.

4 days in, I gotta say it's harder than I thought. In certain areas of my life I actually perform noticeably worse now, than ever, but I'm waiting for all my levels to level.

Don't like the idea of AA and/or any of that other stuff, but I do like what this website has to offer so far.

My biggest issue I think with recovery is all the lovey-dovey group hug stuff, which I despise. Other than that, I'm open minded and tolerant.

ScottFromWI

Welcome MilitiArgh. As the title of the site would imply, "Sober"Recovery is a community dedicated to sobriety and helping others achieve/maintain it. That's not at all to say that there aren't people here that are still drinking or those that haven't quit completely. But our goal is sobriety, not moderation - and discussions about how to successfully moderate or otherwise "control" drinking are not promoted.

Regarding the "lovey-dovey" side of recovery, it certainly exists...but getting sober is a dead serious business for most. You can expect a little of everything here - just take what works and leave what doesn't.

Soberwolf

What's your plan ? If your already finding it tough then how do you see that going long term...

Anna

I hope that you make the decision to stop drinking alcohol, even after the 3 month period.

I don't use AA so I'm not sure if that's what you're referring to as lovey-dovey group hug stuff, but I have used SR as a lifeline for many years.

NestWasEmpty

I think for some including myself those - group hugs & little smile faces bring your Spirit up. Gives encouragement when you can't reach the person - in person .. That's if you mean in here ?
As for AA meetings which I tried a few , I did get some tools to help. No hugs at least not in mine .
I don't really understand if your going to go though the Hard work of getting Sober . Why would you want to not stay Sober ? Maybe it's just me not reading your Post right ...

LBrain

If you want to tone it down, then tone it down. I can assure you that quitting for a specified time with the intention to drink less when the time is up is like jumping out of an airplane and expecting to fly. Well I suppose you would be flying all the way until you hit the ground.

I think you need to educate yourself a little more about how this addiction and brain chemistry all works before you go trying the temporary quit. More times than not, instead of drinking less, we tend to drink more depending on your history.

Carver

Hi!

All I can say is that if you're struggling now, that may indicate that you have a problem.

But it's none of my business if you want to just cut down. Good luck with it!

trachemys

You're here. You obviously know you have a problem. Don't discount anything that may help you.

And watch out where the huskies go.

Hevyn

Welcome to SR MilitiARGH. I think it'll help you to talk things over here.

I was looking to tone down too - not quit - when I first came here. The more I read other's stories, I realized I needed to give up the idea of moderation. It never worked for me - and life was so much better without the challenges my drinking presented. You'll find plenty of encouragement here. Glad to have you.

MilitiARGH

I understand that, however I believe this is an open forum for all walks of people. We all have our reasons to be here, mine is to cut all alcohol intake until I, and others feel that I'm responsible enough to partake again. Could be in 3 months, could be in 3 years, could be never.

I'm not going to pour acid down your neck just for trying to say nice things to me. I just don't believe in the self-congratulation and the promotion of the type of thinking, where you blame alcohol for your problems and NOT yourself.


Do I have a problem with alcohol? Absolutely, yes!
Do I need help? YES!
Can I see myself change, and better myself with time? Yes.

I think that's what recovery is all about, fighting the demon, and conquering it.

However - I apologize if my way of thinking is not supported, and I'm breaking the rules here.

MilitiARGH

I see it going extremely well, just like before I was drinking excessively.

Dee74

Welcome aboard.

I think you'll find this place beneficial - and I hope you'll come to see that we really do care about each other here - it's not empty gestures.
I presume you'll appreciate candour.

I think you're wishing for something that does not exist. I tried for twenty years to find a reset button that would restore me to a 'normal drinker'.

The great flaw in my logic (or one of them at least) was that I was never a normal drinker.

D

MilitiARGH

I honestly don't understand how a smiley face brings anyone's spirit up.

What I'm saying is, I think getting sober is great. If that's what you want.
I don't want to be 100% sober. I want to be normal. I want to be able to go out, eat a steak, watch the game and enjoy a beer, come home and go to work the next day.

Right now I can't. So I'm trying to not drink, which is hard. That's why I'm here.

Hevyn

Moderation was my fondest wish too.

trachemys

These days, Mil, I gravitate to places that have really good iced tea.

MilitiARGH

Alright, first off.
We don't know each other. At all.

"if you want to tone it down, then tone it down" Is easier said than done, that's why I'm quitting all together for a few months first, then re-evaluating.

I can't get any more educated about brain chemistry and addiction, than you can, given the current resources online and their validity.

Who is this "WE" and what does he have to do with me, and my history?
I'm different, so is the next guy. If I'm wrong then burn me at the steak.

MilitiARGH

I've seen my grandfather perish from it and my father pull it off.
I've seen my mother pull it off.
I've seen my friend pull it off.
I WILL pull it off.

Just a matter of fighting the jitters for now. Sorry you couldn't, yet.

MilitiARGH

I do have a problem, that's why I'm toning down.

Thanks for the good luck.

MilitiARGH

A lot of sugar in those, watch out.

trachemys

Unsweet for me.