My method to quitting (and not returning)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 23
My method to quitting (and not returning)
Hello fellow netizens,
I'd like to share with you a method of quitting that I believe will help the kinds of people who recover somewhat easily, only to relapse sometime later.
Personally, I tend to quit for extended periods of time, only to fall back into the abusive lover's arms.
I believe it is because I've never had any externally apparent problems from drinking, all internal. Anxiety, depression, low mood, etc.
After a few months, its easy to forget how it feels to be under the haze of a hangover. On the other hand, it's not easy to forget about something external, like a spouse getting upset or a lost job or similar.
How can we bridge that discrepancy when internal states are internal and thus susceptible to deletion?
My idea starts either immediately before quitting or in the days following, where you still know what it feels like to be glazed.
For the past few days, I have been taking beer cans (full, remnants of my stash and slicing the hell out of them with a knife (in a somewhat angry manner) whenever I feel something negative related to drinking (ex. Paranoia about the previous night's actions, lack of appetite, lack of emotion, etc.).
I then write down on a piece of paper the negative thing that I experienced as a result of drinking.
I then take this piece of paper and place it inside the gutted can.
The idea is to keep the cans around and make a collection of negative attributes in regards to drinking and keep them in one place, so you will not forget about them.
The logic is that in a few months, when I feel tempted again, I can look at the cans and remember exactly why I quit in the first place.
The ideas will also be associated the angry (and sad) act of slicing the cans, further driving home the negative feelings.
I'd like to share with you a method of quitting that I believe will help the kinds of people who recover somewhat easily, only to relapse sometime later.
Personally, I tend to quit for extended periods of time, only to fall back into the abusive lover's arms.
I believe it is because I've never had any externally apparent problems from drinking, all internal. Anxiety, depression, low mood, etc.
After a few months, its easy to forget how it feels to be under the haze of a hangover. On the other hand, it's not easy to forget about something external, like a spouse getting upset or a lost job or similar.
How can we bridge that discrepancy when internal states are internal and thus susceptible to deletion?
My idea starts either immediately before quitting or in the days following, where you still know what it feels like to be glazed.
For the past few days, I have been taking beer cans (full, remnants of my stash and slicing the hell out of them with a knife (in a somewhat angry manner) whenever I feel something negative related to drinking (ex. Paranoia about the previous night's actions, lack of appetite, lack of emotion, etc.).
I then write down on a piece of paper the negative thing that I experienced as a result of drinking.
I then take this piece of paper and place it inside the gutted can.
The idea is to keep the cans around and make a collection of negative attributes in regards to drinking and keep them in one place, so you will not forget about them.
The logic is that in a few months, when I feel tempted again, I can look at the cans and remember exactly why I quit in the first place.
The ideas will also be associated the angry (and sad) act of slicing the cans, further driving home the negative feelings.
aka Nesty
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northern Vt.
Posts: 1,554
I can still remember the smell of stale empty beer cans , turns my stomach 
Just the thought of having them around makes me cringe . My neighbors drink , have parties & toss can's on my lawn .
When they leave for work - I whip them back over in their yard
Just the thought of having them around makes me cringe . My neighbors drink , have parties & toss can's on my lawn .
When they leave for work - I whip them back over in their yard
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Sounds like an admirable attempt - but how about instead of stabbing beer cans, you admit you have a problem and get proper help? In a few months, instead of empty beer cans in your house, you'll have a clean home with space to live away from alcohol of all kinds. Kick the crackerjack philosophy to the curb and take the beer cans with it. Stop drinking and embrace a healthy, optimistic lifestyle by talking to a doctor and sticking around here for support!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
I must say, based on your OP, you drink, but you really hate (which is a strong word) what it does to your life. That's pretty good motivation. While the technique is outside the norm, if it works for you, that's what matters, right?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 23
My problem is less of a traditional drinking problem and more of a distaste for the overall effects of the drug.
It's like when you buy something that looks really delicious from the supermarket only to find that when you eat it that it gives you the *****.
Then, a few months later, you go and do the same thing because you're allured by the appearance and have forgotten just how it bothered you. You know it bothers you, but you don't remember how much.
The allure for me is chemical in nature, I believe. I've always been a dopamine junkie. I want to feel as good as I possibly can.
Alcohol is a reasonable fix for this, but when considering the effects it has the next few days, it's a net loss.
Completely not worth it when the objective is optimization.
Still, it's easy to be lured in by its appeal when the effects of the next days have been forgotten.
As can be deduced from this, I don't drink a lot for obvious reasons, but when I do I continue to drink until I feel great, but ****** the next day.
It's like when you buy something that looks really delicious from the supermarket only to find that when you eat it that it gives you the *****.
Then, a few months later, you go and do the same thing because you're allured by the appearance and have forgotten just how it bothered you. You know it bothers you, but you don't remember how much.
The allure for me is chemical in nature, I believe. I've always been a dopamine junkie. I want to feel as good as I possibly can.
Alcohol is a reasonable fix for this, but when considering the effects it has the next few days, it's a net loss.
Completely not worth it when the objective is optimization.
Still, it's easy to be lured in by its appeal when the effects of the next days have been forgotten.
As can be deduced from this, I don't drink a lot for obvious reasons, but when I do I continue to drink until I feel great, but ****** the next day.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Whats your plan, not in a bad way cutting cans just doesnt do it plus its pretty dangerous
How about a day 1 clearing out the cans giving the home spruce start going mtns start reading up on recovery
You can do this SN
How about a day 1 clearing out the cans giving the home spruce start going mtns start reading up on recovery
You can do this SN
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
Originally Posted by SaviorNomad 
My problem is less of a traditional drinking problem and more of a distaste for the overall effects of the drug.
It's like when you buy something that looks really delicious from the supermarket only to find that when you eat it that it gives you the *****.
Then, a few months later, you go and do the same thing because you're allured by the appearance and have forgotten just how it bothered you. You know it bothers you, but you don't remember how much.
The allure for me is chemical in nature, I believe. I've always been a dopamine junkie. I want to feel as good as I possibly can.
Alcohol is a reasonable fix for this, but when considering the effects it has the next few days, it's a net loss.
Completely not worth it when the objective is optimization.
Still, it's easy to be lured in by its appeal when the effects of the next days have been forgotten.
As can be deduced from this, I don't drink a lot for obvious reasons, but when I do I continue to drink until I feel great, but ****** the next day.
It's like when you buy something that looks really delicious from the supermarket only to find that when you eat it that it gives you the *****.
Then, a few months later, you go and do the same thing because you're allured by the appearance and have forgotten just how it bothered you. You know it bothers you, but you don't remember how much.
The allure for me is chemical in nature, I believe. I've always been a dopamine junkie. I want to feel as good as I possibly can.
Alcohol is a reasonable fix for this, but when considering the effects it has the next few days, it's a net loss.
Completely not worth it when the objective is optimization.
Still, it's easy to be lured in by its appeal when the effects of the next days have been forgotten.
As can be deduced from this, I don't drink a lot for obvious reasons, but when I do I continue to drink until I feel great, but ****** the next day.
Actually, the way your describe your drinking isn't different than a traditional drinking problem at all. You've given us a textbook definition.
About the supermarket and food example of it giving someone the *****, I don't think really anyone would go back and buy it again. And they certainly wouldn't do it the next day. I'd guess by the second or third time eating it, they'd never eat it again.
That's where alcohol is different. It's an addiction. It's self-destructive. We keep going back to it no matter the consequences. I've read stories on here of people who get out of jail for a DUI and stop at the liquor store on the way home. I've also read stories of people who leave rehab and drink the next day. Addiction is totally illogical and we can't think our way out of it.
I would tell a friend this, so I'll go ahead and say it. I think you might be overthinking this whole thing. Alcohol causes you problems and makes you feel like dirt the next day so you need to stop. I would also tell this to a friend: Your drinking problem is not new or different or unique. It sounds a lot like my own before I got sober.
I reread your post and I think you're at a good place to stop. I think you've given a great analysis and it's great to think about it thoroughly.
I'm glad you're here and I'm looking forward to hearing more from you.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Holey, leaky, stinky beer cans could be decorated with Christmas lights to add to the holiday festivities as well I suppose.
I see from one of your earlier threads smoking pot was an issue as well as drinking ; quote - After a month of sobriety, I can feel my former self rising up from the ashes. A side of myself that has been dormant for the past 4 years, asleep under the dark spell of marijuana and alcohol.
Are you quitting the smoke as well?? Would you consider keeping bong water around as a reminder too???
Come on man, come join us!! Bim has it right - surround yourself with positive energies - clear away the wreckage as Sober Wolf suggests!!!
Toss out what beer is around, get some rest and start your new sober journey.
Keep coming back....
I see from one of your earlier threads smoking pot was an issue as well as drinking ; quote - After a month of sobriety, I can feel my former self rising up from the ashes. A side of myself that has been dormant for the past 4 years, asleep under the dark spell of marijuana and alcohol.
Are you quitting the smoke as well?? Would you consider keeping bong water around as a reminder too???
Come on man, come join us!! Bim has it right - surround yourself with positive energies - clear away the wreckage as Sober Wolf suggests!!!
Toss out what beer is around, get some rest and start your new sober journey.
Keep coming back....
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Personally, I think changing YOURSELF so you don't need alcohol to cope with life would be a more effective solution.
Your way sounds like lab-rat conditioning. We hoomin beans are a little more complicated.
Your way sounds like lab-rat conditioning. We hoomin beans are a little more complicated.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
you're going for fear of consequences. when you get tempted again, you'll try and get fresh memory of consequences...
but it won't be fresh.
"consequences be damned!" is unfamiliar to you?
plus the then new:"see?! i could quit, i already did, so therefore i can quit again so therefore...on and on."
making real changes to a sober lifestyle, whatever that may look like for you, has a better chance of success than relying on cut-up beer cans.
it's harder, too.....you ready for some hard work?
but it won't be fresh.
"consequences be damned!" is unfamiliar to you?
plus the then new:"see?! i could quit, i already did, so therefore i can quit again so therefore...on and on."
making real changes to a sober lifestyle, whatever that may look like for you, has a better chance of success than relying on cut-up beer cans.
it's harder, too.....you ready for some hard work?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 23
People assume that this is the only change I intend to make.
My purpose of making this post was not to share my plan, but to share the part of my plan that was probably not attempted by others.
I forgot about the fact that people dislike anything that is unfamiliar to them. It's a shame, too, because it's the same reason that people keep falling back to drink... To what's familiar to them.
Continue doing the tried and true, I'm sure it'll work. I mean, it doesn't generally work, and most will relapse again, but the tried and true methods are better!
I'll be back, or maybe I won't. Idk, I've got more important things to do... Being an engineer and all.
My purpose of making this post was not to share my plan, but to share the part of my plan that was probably not attempted by others.
I forgot about the fact that people dislike anything that is unfamiliar to them. It's a shame, too, because it's the same reason that people keep falling back to drink... To what's familiar to them.
Continue doing the tried and true, I'm sure it'll work. I mean, it doesn't generally work, and most will relapse again, but the tried and true methods are better!
I'll be back, or maybe I won't. Idk, I've got more important things to do... Being an engineer and all.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 23
Also, haven't smoked pot in over a year.
My strange methods are quite effective as I was for more addicted to weed than alcohol.
Alcohol has just been less enjoyable for the most part, but it gets me so intoxicated I can't remember that.
My strange methods are quite effective as I was for more addicted to weed than alcohol.
Alcohol has just been less enjoyable for the most part, but it gets me so intoxicated I can't remember that.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,429
I forgot about the fact that people dislike anything that is unfamiliar to them.
There's no one way that will work for everyone.
If there was we wouldn't need Moderators here
Posting stuff invites responses, comments and opinions. It's the way this forum thing works.
I said your way would not work for me, and that's because I tried similar things.
I broke a coffee table in matchwood one night. I kept it around to help me remember, and had a pic of it in my wallet. Didn't work.
(Neither did the pic of my late grandmother who I loved beyond words)
I have a scar on my nose from being drunk and falling over. It's pretty big white and angry.
I was sure that would remind me not to do this crazy **** again.
That didn't work either.
It didn't work because I was always able to willingly give into delusion and convince myself that 'this time it'll be different'... this time, I'll stop at two beers, or I'll stop before I get drunk, or I'll alternate with glasses of water, or NA beer.
None of that worked either.
I'm genuinely glad you found a way that works for you, but please don't tell me I'm scared of your way or I don't understand it.
If it's working for you, just be glad it's working, man
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 23
Thanks for not reacting.
I've been rather reactive the past few days, perhaps due to quitting.
I'm not sure, but that's what I'm going with.
It's these kinds of things that I write down in the cans.
Feelings, I think, are things that we can't control. We can decide not to act on them, but the feelings still remain.
Alcohol creates negative feelings, and I'd rather have positive feelings than negative feelings, and so I write down the negative ones, both in cans and in journals.
Speaking of journals, I think it's time for an entry.
I've been rather reactive the past few days, perhaps due to quitting.
I'm not sure, but that's what I'm going with.
It's these kinds of things that I write down in the cans.
Feelings, I think, are things that we can't control. We can decide not to act on them, but the feelings still remain.
Alcohol creates negative feelings, and I'd rather have positive feelings than negative feelings, and so I write down the negative ones, both in cans and in journals.
Speaking of journals, I think it's time for an entry.
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