I screwed up
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: windsor, on
Posts: 104
I screwed up
Ok I screwed up and drank last night. I had over a week. I of course had to embarrass myself on social media. I texted stupid **** to my bf who has already stated he was done if I drank again. I was so proud of myself too. This is how a binge starts for me the guilt and shame of what I have done when drinking then I think having a drink today will make me feel better.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 147
A drink will not make you feel better. Get another week in. Don't give up. Those sober days pile up. I used to think if I drank once a week I'd be thrilled. Now, I'm like only day 6. I want 365 days. I want 5 years, then 10 years. You can do it
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Originally Posted by chloebaby 
This is how a binge starts for me ...
What's the solution? You posted here because you want one, right? You ratted out your AV.
What have you got for a plan so far? How can we help?
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
This doesn't have to be the same as the other times. What can you do differently today instead of drinking? Stay close to SR for one thing. How about an AA meeting? Maybe some research on self help methods? There are many options.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 10
It's not the end of the world. You can always start over today, don't beat yourself up about it. Just buckle up, and hop back on the wagon! This site is really helpful for me. If you want 365 days, make 365 days! If you drink today, to make yourself feel better, youll be having this same conversation tomorrow, and also a wasted day that you could have been sober. Try try and try again! You can do it. Praying for you
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: windsor, on
Posts: 104
Im lost now. I thought I had it together. I don't think I even have a plan. I kinda knew that I was gonna have a problem as soon as I woke up yesterday I had it in my mind about just having a couple cuz I was upset.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
There's nothing wrong with going back to the drawing board 
This is a good start on making a plan:
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
D
This is a good start on making a plan:
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
D
Adventurer
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Tuxedo Park, NY
Posts: 1,101
It always starts out as just a few drinks with me, then the snowball gets rolling and I wake up in pain the next day that usually lasts a few days. This one place I never want to go back too, a few hours of mind numbing pleasure resulting in days of agony and Ill health is no trade off.
It's just not worth it. Would you eat chocolate if it tasted great but kept you in bed miserable all day tomorrow or full of anxiety and brain fog?
It's just not worth it. Would you eat chocolate if it tasted great but kept you in bed miserable all day tomorrow or full of anxiety and brain fog?
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Originally Posted by chloebaby
Im lost now.
Lost people aren't posting on SR. You have (perhaps unwittingly) ratted out your AV once again. Mine is all about how I'm a lost cause - just give up and drink. Seem like yours is telling the same lie.
I'm with Dee - never too late to start over. Your will is there. Find the way!
You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
It's going to be okay, chloebaby. Start fresh today.
This is a great day to formulate a plan.
I ran across this brilliant post from our wise and dedicated Anna the other day:
"
This is a great day to formulate a plan.
I ran across this brilliant post from our wise and dedicated Anna the other day:
"
Originally Posted by Anna
This link will give you information on various Recovery Programs in the U.S, Canada, Australia & New Zealand and the UK:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
This link contains personal experiences of how we stopped:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
Following are some Specific Ideas for your Recovery Plan
1.Therapy can be useful – Group Therapy, Addiction Counsellor, One-on-One Counselling, CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
2.Reading (An awesome way to supplement your recovery). Here is our Book Thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rituality.html
3.Guided Meditation, Mindful Meditation, Yoga & Pilates
4. Exercise – Walking is a great way to help recovery. It gets you outside, gets you moving, gets you connecting to your community, physically your body will feel better and it helps get you outside of your head. But, there are lots of other ways to fitness.
Here is a link to the Fitness, Health & Nutrition thread:
Fitness, Health, and Nutrition - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
5. A Gratitude Journal – Here is a link to our Gratitude Thread:
The Gratitude List - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
6. Chat Room – Many of our members make regular use of the Chat Room. Here is the link with information:
Chat Meetings and Chat Discussions - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
7. Cravings? This is a great thread with tips for dealing with cravings:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
8. Urge Surfing – This link is really helpful for getting through the really tough minutes of urges to drink:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html
9. Reaching Out – Be prepared with Phone #’s from people you can talk to if you’re having a hard time. Keep SR close by, we are open 24 hours a day. We do have a great, free App which you can download and keep with you on your phone".
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
This link contains personal experiences of how we stopped:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
Following are some Specific Ideas for your Recovery Plan
1.Therapy can be useful – Group Therapy, Addiction Counsellor, One-on-One Counselling, CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
2.Reading (An awesome way to supplement your recovery). Here is our Book Thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rituality.html
3.Guided Meditation, Mindful Meditation, Yoga & Pilates
4. Exercise – Walking is a great way to help recovery. It gets you outside, gets you moving, gets you connecting to your community, physically your body will feel better and it helps get you outside of your head. But, there are lots of other ways to fitness.
Here is a link to the Fitness, Health & Nutrition thread:
Fitness, Health, and Nutrition - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
5. A Gratitude Journal – Here is a link to our Gratitude Thread:
The Gratitude List - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
6. Chat Room – Many of our members make regular use of the Chat Room. Here is the link with information:
Chat Meetings and Chat Discussions - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
7. Cravings? This is a great thread with tips for dealing with cravings:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
8. Urge Surfing – This link is really helpful for getting through the really tough minutes of urges to drink:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html
9. Reaching Out – Be prepared with Phone #’s from people you can talk to if you’re having a hard time. Keep SR close by, we are open 24 hours a day. We do have a great, free App which you can download and keep with you on your phone".
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 754
Originally Posted by chloebaby
I kinda knew that I was gonna have a problem as soon as I woke up yesterday I had it in my mind about just having a couple...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: windsor, on
Posts: 104
Thankyou everyone. I just wish I would of came here first or even called my as friend. Now I have to go to my aa meeting ashamed. Sounds really dumb but I didn't want to bother her in case she was doing something. Just as I thought I was on the right path. At least now though its not a passing thought im actively trying to beat this. Im soooo mad and I hate that voice in my head.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Chicago
Posts: 5,450
Hi chloebaby. Shame is a real killer isn't it? It can snowball so easily and rob your strength. I hope the support of folks here will help you let go of those less-than-helpful feelings and instead focus on what you can do to make changes.
Recently you were talking of a 90-day rehab. Maybe it is time reconsider that option?
Recently you were talking of a 90-day rehab. Maybe it is time reconsider that option?
Hang on!
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Ohio
Posts: 181
Originally Posted by chloebaby
Ok I screwed up [...] how a binge starts for me the guilt and shame....
"Doctor, it hurts when I do this."
"Then don't do that."
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 563
Hi Chloe. As others have said, don't beat yourself up over this. I drank two nights ago after I had three and a half months sober. Drinking and the ensuing hangover were hell. But I am so grateful that I never have to do that again. I have hope. A lot of that hope comes from my Class of April 2015. It really helps me to have a group of people that help me stay accountable and I can vent and describe my cravings to. They are my rock. I would suggest you check out the Class of August 2015 on the Newcomer's thread.
You should absolutely not feel shame for going to AA and admit to drinking. Instead, you should feel proud of yourself for grabbing the bull by the horns and recognizing that you made a mistake, but it is a mistake you want to learn from. You can do this!!
You should absolutely not feel shame for going to AA and admit to drinking. Instead, you should feel proud of yourself for grabbing the bull by the horns and recognizing that you made a mistake, but it is a mistake you want to learn from. You can do this!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: windsor, on
Posts: 104
The rehab was on the table but because of some issues my doctor won't do the paperwork they require. The therapist or counsellor whatever she is thinks I would do well with outpatient 2x a week. She said because I have only been drinking a little over a year she thinks this is the best option and if after 2 or 3 weeks I feel I still need rehab then she will help me get in. On another note as I was a great worker and everyone liked me my work is giving me another chance. So is my bf.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 147
Just so you know. All of us have slipped and relapsed. Personally, sometimes It took me a day or two to figure out why and I thought I was so stupid. You know, how did I not see that coming. I know one guy that has been trying since 1990. Keep trying. You can succeed
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