Renegade2

I'm starting to lose the count of days since I started being sober, which is great.

Another great news is that today at the gym I weighted myself on the scale and realized that in less than 2 months I lost 5 Kgs / 10 pounds! Just by cutting alcohol and hitting the gym! I'm noticiable slimmer and almost without the beer belly. My 6 pack (not beer LOL) is starting to show after many years hidden beneath all that beer fat.

It's great to be sober.

Dee74

Congrats renegade!

D

BornSurvivor

Good job Renegade... Keep it going!!!

Renegade2

Hi all!

It's been a long time since I last updated this thread.

Things have been going well. It's been over 3 months and I'm feeling great.

That pain in my liver? Gone. Never felt it again.

It's worth being sober.

If I can do it, so can you.

Dee74

Congrats on your sober time!

SoberInCLE

Welcome Renegade! Why not attend some online AA or Secular Sobriety (AA w/o God) meetings? They are a great resource and your even more anonymous than in-person if you turn your video off. It took me two years to go to some meetings but they were great. I still pretend I may drink normally, but I'm finally done cheating. The sole reason I drink is to get high. Good luck! Btw, I journaled online but I forget the name of the company. It was cool because I could do it at work while my mind was racing.

Hevyn

So glad to hear you're doing great Renegade.

FreeOwl

right on, renegade!

Renegade2

Hi again.
My last post was on December, I was on a near 4-month streak, doing great, going strong.
Then, the Holidays, the family dinners, the dinners with friends was the beginning of the relapse, I started drinking.
January wasn't that bad, but from then on it was downhill.
The worst thing is those damned lockdowns that went through late April. By May I was a drinking heavily again.
So, here I am, feeling like s*it. This last weekend was awful, always with a bottle near me and not being able to sleep well.
Last night, to avoid another sleepless night I took a pill against stress to calm me and help me sleep. It actually helped me, I slept OK and I'm now here at work, but I feel so tired and I have so much stuff to get done today.
God help me.

Obladi

I’m glad you’re back here, Renegade.

Folks here know the gawdawfulness of Mondays after an especially bad weekend. I’m really sorry you’re going through this.

I hope you’re ready to give sobriety another chance. I still don’t love Monday, but the absence of withdrawal is a definite boost. 🙂

O

CaptainHaddock

I am glad that you want to make your way back, Renegade. Monday hangovers are just the worst. You seem to build a good couple of sober months and then something happens that makes you pick up again. I am just guessing that perhaps you still believe that you’ll be able to moderate, once there is a bit of space between you and your last drink, by this time never having more than a couple, only with dinner on weekends, never straight from the bottle etc. I tried it many times and always found that I can control my drinking, until I can’t anymore.

I know that you can free yourself from this vicious cycle and look forward to seeing more of your posts.

Hevyn

Renegade - I commend you for coming back here to talk about what happened. Your honesty & willingness to admit you're in trouble will help you get back on track. The holidays years ago are what ruined my 3 yrs. of sobriety. I wanted so badly to feel normal & join in the celebrating with everyone else. Knowing full well where it would lead me - directly back to misery & regret.
It's so good to see you. I hope it helps to know we are here to listen and encourage you. You're going to get your sobriety back.

Dee74

welcome back

Any ideas yet on how you'll guard against complacency and opportunity this time?

D

DriGuy

It should now be clear that you can never drink again. Your best shot at being normal is by not drinking, so it's wise to reset your definition of "normal." Thankfully, the actual definition does not emphasize being able to hold your liquor, which as an alcoholic, is something that you will never be able to do. However, taking a drink, when you can't stop, most people would consider abnormal. Being normal includes so many positive qualities, but the myopic vision of the alcoholic centers the definition around drinking. If you like feeling normal, don't drink.

Mizz

Monday hangovers are the worst. I had one almost every single Monday.
There is hope. Just read back on this thread and take in all the good. You will get there again.
One foot in front of the other. You got this.

biminiblue

If you want a life that's peaceful and happy, stop giving yourself excuses to drink.

It's completely possible to live a life without alcohol regardless of what the world around you does.

I far prefer being in control of myself and never feeling sick.

I hope you join us.

Renegade2

Hi folks.

Vacation is over, so no more booze. I'm getting clean, starts today. My liver is kicking my ribs from the inside and it's not a nice feeling, it needs a break from all the hard work it had these last months. Now it's time to give my liver some vacations.

Renegade2

Hi folks.

Second day at work and second day I hit the gym.

I noticed some pain in my liver area after running 5 minutes on the treadmill. I only stopped going to the gym for 2 weeks, I can't be this "rusty" that my body starts complaining just after 5 minutes. Other that, I finished my run like I always did, I didn't noticed anything different than before other than than liver pain.
I'll see how the next days at the gym will turn out.

Renegade2

Hi again.

After almost a year, here I am again.
Yet another Day 1 for me. I'm so tired to fail repeatedly.
Yesterday at the middle of the afternoon, I was so wasted with a mix of 3 different drinks in my stomach that I threw up and passed out, waking up 2 hours later. Luckily the wife didn't notice and thought I just went for a nap.
Of course I haven't slept at night and feel like crap this morning here in the office, trying to focus at work. It's going to be a long day...
Please make this the beginning of a long streak! I'm so done with Day 1's.

AAPJ

Welcome back. I really appreciate your persistence. You started this thread in 2015. This shows how long and hard the road can be. You are not alone here. I really like your two simple rules. Thanks again for posting.