I'm finally here
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 274
Some of us just can't be "normal" drinkers. I know I can't. I used to be but alcoholism is progressive. It might be good to come out of your shell and admit to having a problem. Can not and will not? I think others know already. In any case there are many ways to have healthy support! Only you can decide what works for you but honesty and having a plan is the best way IMHO. Here in the South ice tea is my lunch favorite drink. I take mine unsweetened. Sparkling water is good, too, as pointed above. Try it and the food will taste so much better.
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
That's my problem right there - I can't drink just one cup, I'm not normal like everyone around me. I've accepted that some time ago, but failed to reduce the consumption because of that - I know I'll have 3 or 4 beers in a row, just because my inner demon tells me to continue, or that no bottle must remain half empty, I don't know why, but it can't...
I'm feeling confident more than ever now. I hope this is the time I finally quit.
That's a good idea Ice Water, I have a new blender and now that the spring is coming, I'll have plenty of fresh juices! And I'll make cold teas too!
I'm feeling confident more than ever now. I hope this is the time I finally quit.
That's a good idea Ice Water, I have a new blender and now that the spring is coming, I'll have plenty of fresh juices! And I'll make cold teas too!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 42
Welcome, Renegade. Lots of men and women here in your same situation. Moderation is an absolute impossibility for me. I am 100% alcoholic. I've tried to stop since I was 25 and am now over double that. I'm on day 6, but have hope. It sounds like you do, too, as you have a good attitude.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Good to see you back with us, Renegade.
Realizing I could never have just one or two was my biggest challenge. I tried for years to manage my drinking - it never worked once. Getting free of it all together was the only way. You can do it!
Realizing I could never have just one or two was my biggest challenge. I tried for years to manage my drinking - it never worked once. Getting free of it all together was the only way. You can do it!
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Welcoem back Renegade 
any ideas on how you'll actually stay sober?
D
any ideas on how you'll actually stay sober?
D
Yes, realizing that I can't have only 1 or 2 drinks and seeing my blood test results where terrible. That was my trigger.
I'm on day 6, I slept very well, very deeply. Woke up feeling great, as if it was weekend. I'm having contant music in my head. I'm at work now, being friendly with everyone around. I'm feeling great!
Life's good!
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
Hi gents. After a relapse that lasted months (until recently, really), I'm reducing the amount. I quit buying beer or wine for 3 weeks and just had a couple of beers during that time.
Let's hope my next blood tests show some kind of evolution.
My barber the other day told me something that stuck with me: "You're now entering an age where everything you did bad to your body for the past 20 years will begin to take its toll". Apparently he too was a heavy drinker, but managed to control it and now he's in great shape.
One other thing - my liver has been aching for at least more than year. I've noticed the pain is milder in these past weeks, but the "numbing" sensation is still there. Any of you gents experienced the same? How long has it take until you notice the liver is back to normal?
Let's hope my next blood tests show some kind of evolution.
My barber the other day told me something that stuck with me: "You're now entering an age where everything you did bad to your body for the past 20 years will begin to take its toll". Apparently he too was a heavy drinker, but managed to control it and now he's in great shape.
One other thing - my liver has been aching for at least more than year. I've noticed the pain is milder in these past weeks, but the "numbing" sensation is still there. Any of you gents experienced the same? How long has it take until you notice the liver is back to normal?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 108
Renegade we’ve all been where you are. I regret to inform you that cutting back to beer is not going to work. You’re an alcoholic; you cannot under any circumstance drink any alcohol. I’m no doctor but the only way your blood tests will get better or liver pains will go away is to STOP. Easier said than done but it’s much better than the alternative. Wish you the best of luck. It can be done. I’m living proof.
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
Hi gents.
Just got my new blood tests results and they're great! Everything within the limits! Big drop of cholesterol and triglycerides levels to what the doctors say are "normal".
I'm glad I cut beer and wine to almost no consumption and now the results tell me I did well.
Have a great day!
Just got my new blood tests results and they're great! Everything within the limits! Big drop of cholesterol and triglycerides levels to what the doctors say are "normal".
I'm glad I cut beer and wine to almost no consumption and now the results tell me I did well.
Have a great day!
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
Hi D.
2 and a half years later, here I am again...
Shortly after my last post, I relapsed and gotten worst.
These last 3 years have been terrible, having worst and worst episodes. The hangovers are worst than ever, my body is tired of all this, but my brain keeps telling me "More! More!"
I gained weight and don't feel as comfortable with my body like I always have. I started going to the gym and feel better now, but on my weekends is when all hell breaks loose. I was so drunk yesterday that I had to throw up without anyone noticing it.
I'm just tired of this. Enough is enough.
2 and a half years later, here I am again...
Shortly after my last post, I relapsed and gotten worst.
These last 3 years have been terrible, having worst and worst episodes. The hangovers are worst than ever, my body is tired of all this, but my brain keeps telling me "More! More!"
I gained weight and don't feel as comfortable with my body like I always have. I started going to the gym and feel better now, but on my weekends is when all hell breaks loose. I was so drunk yesterday that I had to throw up without anyone noticing it.
I'm just tired of this. Enough is enough.
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hi and welcome back renegade
Glad your results were better.
Are you still at almost no consumption, or have you quit completely now?
D
Glad your results were better.
Are you still at almost no consumption, or have you quit completely now?
D
Not a native English speaker
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Latin Europe
Posts: 152
Day 1 was OK. I had dinner with the wife, had some nice sea food and usually that would go down with at least one bottle of chilled wine or beer. Not yesterday. Never again.
I still had a couple of cans of beer in the fridge from the wild weekend I just had, so I served the wife with beer. She enjoys it, but barely drinks half a can, she left most of the beer in the cup, like always, I'd drink the rest without her noticing it. I just cleanup the table and threw the beer in the sink.
I slept OK and woke up OK. I'm at work focused, but I feel mild liver pain. I'll hit the gym later on, hope to feel better with my body and mind.
I still had a couple of cans of beer in the fridge from the wild weekend I just had, so I served the wife with beer. She enjoys it, but barely drinks half a can, she left most of the beer in the cup, like always, I'd drink the rest without her noticing it. I just cleanup the table and threw the beer in the sink.
I slept OK and woke up OK. I'm at work focused, but I feel mild liver pain. I'll hit the gym later on, hope to feel better with my body and mind.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: New York, New York
Posts: 600
As I’m sure you already know you need to focus all your energy on not drinking at this early stage of sobriety, white knuckling it as they say. You are wiser now than 5 years ago when you first posted. The relapses have shown that you can’t drink. Full stop. Four years ago I went through what you did after an alarming blood test and still I had to relapse twice to convince me I could not control my drinking. Sure I could moderate for a little while but always ended up drinking all day, every day and the physical effects only got worse from the increased alcohol dependence and the progressive nature of alcoholism. Thanks to the advice and encouragement from SR, daily gratitude, exercise, and eliminating negative thinking I am now sober for over two years. It gets easier. You can do it!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
