kdg3

Hello everyone I'm 25 and I've had a problem with alcohol since I was about 18.. I'm feeling hopeless because I can't count the number of times Ive said I was done for good and then let myself fall back into the trap that just allowing myself to have one beer here and there isn't going to hurt me... About five years ago I was introduced to cocaine and had previously experimented with ecstasy in high school while attending rave like parties with my girlfriends.. Even then while I was coming down off my high I would swear up and down that it would be the last time but it never is.. I haven't used ecstasy much anymore but I feel like I have created a new problem for myself with the cocaine use .. It's almost like it's not about the drinking anymore but i need to drink to use it.. I feel sick because I want nothing more than to put this all behind me but I feel scared that it's only a matter of time before I am able to convince myself it's okay to drink a little and eventually end up using cocaine again. If I don't use the drug then I would just drink until I blackout which was a huge problem for me from the age of 19 to about 23 when I was able to at least make minor changes and only blackout on the weekends which isn't much of a change at all.. I don't drink constantly or all week long now but I still can't completely quit either.. I'm writing here for help and maybe a little guidance I'm starting today with the want to quit drinking and using for good but part of me feels like that may never happen

FreeOwl

my advice is; stop it all.

I've been there... with coke, x, drinking.... all of it. They all feed and fuel one another.

I wish I'd had the self-honesty to even WANT to stop at your age. Back then I was still convincing myself there was no problem. It was all just good fun. All pretty much normal. "Everyone" did it.

Which was all exactly the giant lie that it clearly is.

I finally "got it" in my 40's.

I'm absolutely sure that I'd have had a better life, a happier life, a richer sense of self and would be in a far better place all around had I embraced sobriety back then.

Please, give it all you've got now. Don't wait another 15+ years.

least

Welcome to the family. I hope the support here can help you get clean and sober for good.

saoutchik

Well done for posting kdg3 especially as you are only 25. You must have good self awareness

Probably the thing you will have to change is your social life which I know isn't easy at your age but probably best to stay away from people and places linked with drinking/using

The physical withdrawal should be easier at your age but you could visit your doctor number if you feel unwell of course - I think they have to keep anything you tell them secret

Soberwolf

Welcome Kdg

Nowsthetime

Hello:

I relate a lot...

I suggest that you read a lot here and post whenever you need to. Also make a plan. A plan does y have to be difficult, it can just be things like posting here, checking in to read, or going for a walk when you have a craving. There are lots of threads about it so you can get ideas and make your own.

This is your deal and we are here to support you all you need.

toadie54

Welcome, kdg3!

Only you can decide when you want to remain abstinent. There is much information and support here on SR, so take advantage of it.

It starts with day 1!

kdg3

Thank you everyone... I'm really trying my hardest to reach out and gain support because I come from a family were everyone drinks.. It is something I have been brought up around and my parents were also addicted to meth for about a 10 year span of my childhood so it's hard to talk to them because they still drink although they no longer use I just don't think they are far enough in their own recovery to really understand what I'm going through or grasp that they were not there for me a lot of the times when I needed them.. It's hard to ask for help or admit that I do need help to quit but I obviously have tried too many times before to quit without asking for help to not except that I really need guidance and that my cravings are a lot stronger than I would like to admit ... I joined SR about a year ago and this is only my third post so I'm going to try really hard this time to keep posting and not only help myself but hopefully help others along the way.. It's good to not feel alone in this because feeling alone is something I have always struggled with in my life and I just want to enjoy my life to fullest with out drugs and alcohol.

thomas11

Ha! At 25 years old I was in my "prime", didn't even occur to me to quit or that I had a problem with coke (god, I hate even writing that). I can only share my experience, I quit the craziness at about 28ish. THEE hardest part was separating myself from the social circle I was in. Once that was accomplished, the rest was not as hard, because deep down I knew it was wrong, it was illegal, its frowned upon by the good people of the world, its dangerous and on and on. You are wise beyond your years to be where you are at. Drinking is a little different animal, its legal, its everywhere, its socially acceptable blah blah blah. If you want to quit bad enough, you can make that change. Be prepared to be hit with some peer pressure, to disappoint some people, but I believe you know deep down its the right thing to do. My only advice would be to stay close to this site, people here will help you and provide you with the strength you may need to decline those coke and booze binges. They will lead you nowhere. Wishing you the very best.

Dee74

some great advice here already kdg

glad you found us
D

Soberwolf

Hope you have a good day kdg

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Kdg!!

SereneEdition

Hi kdg3 -

Welcome and glad you are posting. I too tried to stop at 25 and found it hard to stay stopped due to social situations pulling you back in. I echo thomas's comments that finding a new social circle helps tremendously.

At the beginning I found it awkward to 'sit' out while my friends were off doing things. Let's be honest - I didn't have a life outside of alcohol!

But things did get better and now I have waaaay more fun and much richer life being sober with a friend group that doesn't revolve around alcohol.

I wish the same for you.