I freaking drank.
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
I straight up panicked.
Panicked when I realized what it was.
Panicked when I realized what I had just done.
Panicked when I started to feel the effects.
Panicked for the next hour.
Panicked when I wanted to throw All my sobriety away.
Panicked when I realized I could keep drinking it and no one would be any the wiser.
No one would ever know.
But I'd know.
It honestly felt like the building was on fire and I couldn't find the exit.
Strangely, yesterday afternoon, I asked for a "sign" if I had to continue on this sobriety path.
Careful what you ask for.
As If there was ever a doubt.
Panicked when I realized what it was.
Panicked when I realized what I had just done.
Panicked when I started to feel the effects.
Panicked for the next hour.
Panicked when I wanted to throw All my sobriety away.
Panicked when I realized I could keep drinking it and no one would be any the wiser.
No one would ever know.
But I'd know.
It honestly felt like the building was on fire and I couldn't find the exit.
Strangely, yesterday afternoon, I asked for a "sign" if I had to continue on this sobriety path.
Careful what you ask for.
As If there was ever a doubt.
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
"Panicked when I realized I could keep drinking it and no one would be any the wiser.
No one would ever know."
I'm pretty sure that's were my mind would want to go if I was faced with that situation. I was big into if know one knows there is no problem. Just sit there and drink it and pretend nothing happened. What I would actually do though is be caught so off guard I would freak out like someone handed me a live grenade. Go running out of the bar screaming something unintelligible.
A couple of summers ago when I was visiting your town I was on the second floor of a Walgreens taking the escalator down. As I came down the elevator I saw this display of alcohol all along the wall. I remember my mind lightening up like a Christmas tree and feeling panic setting in. In Minnesota alcohol is only sold in liquor stores so I was able to completely avoid it. It did rattle me pretty bad for a few days. I ended up having to post about it just to work through it.
No one would ever know."
I'm pretty sure that's were my mind would want to go if I was faced with that situation. I was big into if know one knows there is no problem. Just sit there and drink it and pretend nothing happened. What I would actually do though is be caught so off guard I would freak out like someone handed me a live grenade. Go running out of the bar screaming something unintelligible.
A couple of summers ago when I was visiting your town I was on the second floor of a Walgreens taking the escalator down. As I came down the elevator I saw this display of alcohol all along the wall. I remember my mind lightening up like a Christmas tree and feeling panic setting in. In Minnesota alcohol is only sold in liquor stores so I was able to completely avoid it. It did rattle me pretty bad for a few days. I ended up having to post about it just to work through it.
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
Hey AO, did you see this thread?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rreaction.html
Sounds like a similar situation and a similar reaction. There are some great comments on that thread too.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rreaction.html
Sounds like a similar situation and a similar reaction. There are some great comments on that thread too.
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