Blogs


Notices

How many times did you relapse before recovery?

Old 07-14-2015, 07:40 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 33
How many times did you relapse before recovery?

Hey there,

To those of you who have been sober for a while please feel free to share how long you've been sober for and how many times you relapsed.

I've had several relapses but I'm going to keep persevering.

Nick.
NickOz21 is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to NickOz21 For This Useful Post:
48heath (07-15-2015), aasharon90 (07-15-2015), courage2 (07-14-2015), CousinA (07-17-2015), DuhDave (07-17-2015), Fly N Buy (07-15-2015), MythOfSisyphus (07-15-2015)
Old 07-14-2015, 07:52 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
p***enger
 
courage2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 16,233
Not sure what constitutes "a while". I've been sober 17 months. Before that I was sober for a year, and then had a 3 week relapse. I consider it a relapse because I had really quit for a solid amount of time, and very deliberately picked back up.

Before my first sobriety date a little after I joined this forum, I'd told myself and other people that I was quitting. But I never made a serious effort -- any time, as soon as it got hard, I caved and drank. I don't consider that a relapse -- it's just not a real quit.

Good luck to you!
courage2 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to courage2 For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), Fly N Buy (07-15-2015), Meraviglioso (07-14-2015), Tang (07-15-2015)
Old 07-14-2015, 08:10 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
under new management
 
2ndhandrose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 2,161
Hi NickOz21, Welcome to SR!!

I was in recovery for 6 years and then relapsed for 22 years and here I am back in the sober saddle and working on recovery for the past 6 1/2 months.

Never going back again!

Stick around SR and you will find great support and resources to help you formulate a plan to stay quit.

2ndhandrose is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to 2ndhandrose For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), EE2010 (07-16-2015), Fly N Buy (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), MelindaFlowers (07-15-2015), Meraviglioso (07-14-2015)
Old 07-14-2015, 09:42 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 188,467
Blog Entries: 1
I tried every week or so 'to stay sober' for 15 years maybe?

I realise now though what I actually really wanted was to find a way to drink responsibly.

Once I accepted the need for change, and accepted my relationship with alcohol was irredeemably toxic, I've stayed sober since 2007.

D
Dee74 is offline  
The Following 19 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
4stars (07-15-2015), aasharon90 (07-15-2015), brynn (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), CaseyW (07-14-2015), ccam1973 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), EE2010 (07-16-2015), esoxlucius (07-17-2015), gettingsmarter (07-15-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), KDBnSLC (07-15-2015), LilyMarie (07-15-2015), Meraviglioso (07-14-2015), PennyLane76 (07-15-2015), sg1970 (07-15-2015), Zaec (07-15-2015)
Old 07-14-2015, 09:51 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 1,087
I'm still on the relapsing cycle, but I'll let you know when I know.

*sigh*
TroyW is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to TroyW For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), LilyMarie (07-15-2015)
Old 07-14-2015, 11:35 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
BarbieKen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 4,552
I got into my recovery a month after turning 55. On the 12th of this month, I have 2 years 8 months. Personally I don't believe you have to expect a relapse. My Sponsor just turned 29 years sober, she has never "gone out".

So many folks I know in double digits still are taking daily action in their recovery. Meetings, Committments, sponsee's, volunteering, working the steps with their Sponsee. Being of service to the group and individual. Basically staying connected in these ways & more....gives you a major advantage in sticking to your recovery! Be willing and open minded. And, of course, have a connection with your Higher Power!

Try staying busy and active each day of your own recovery. As the saying goes " Surround yourself with the winners"!!
You can do this!
Bobbi
BarbieKen is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to BarbieKen For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), CaseyW (07-14-2015), ChiefBromden (07-15-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), sg1970 (07-15-2015), tomsteve (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 12:00 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,642
Well, this is a tough one to answer

I tried many times to "moderate" and to quit. When I was 27, I managed to stay sober for a year. Here and there, I'd stop for a few days and a few weeks at a time. Six months a couple of times.

Then I joined SR in 2011. I drank again, and didn't quit for good until April of 2013 (age 35).

The final result of all the years of drinking (about 15 years total) was that I had come to a place where I fully accepted I could no longer handle any amount of drinking. Not one drop. Ever.
Soberpotamus is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Soberpotamus For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), brynn (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), MythOfSisyphus (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 01:24 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
MythOfSisyphus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,246
I agree, tough to really answer. For years I had a vague awareness that I didn't drink like everyone else I knew. My drinking had...an edge to it, for lack of a better word. A few times over the years I'd vow to ratchet it back a notch, and a couple times I took "breaks" from drinking. But eventually I kind of gave in and just tried to mitigate the damage instead. For example, I quit going out to bars so I wouldn't have to drive.

But back in October 2012 I finally got so sick of it that I no longer wanted to live if living meant being a drunk. Somewhere around the 3rd or 4th I took my last drink. Since then I have not had a drop, so no relapses at all. Maybe it's because I just got burned out on it to the point where I gave up on booze. Obviously if I was foolish enough to drink again I'd back where I was. But I have no desire to pick up a wine glass again now.
MythOfSisyphus is offline  
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to MythOfSisyphus For This Useful Post:
4stars (07-15-2015), aasharon90 (07-15-2015), brynn (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), MelindaFlowers (07-15-2015), Ohme (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 03:04 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
AA member
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 852
I tried many times to stay sober,it was staying stopped that was my problem.

I once stayed sober 3 years,on my own.

Eventually I went to AA,since that day over 12 years ago,I have not needed to drink.I still attend meetings,not going is not an option,left to my own devices I know I would drink again.

Relapse need not be a part of recovery.
48heath is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to 48heath For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), IOAA2 (07-17-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 03:34 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
aasharon90's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 12,370
Family had to do an intervention on me
back in Aug. 1990 placing me into the
hands of those familiar with knowledge
of addiction and recovery.

I spent 28 days in a rehab facility with
a 6 week outpatiant aftercare program
attached to fulfill my rehab experience.

Fast forward to today, some 24 yrs of
many one days at a time sober, AA meetings,
service work, passing on my own ESH -
experiences, strengths and hopes of what
my life was before, during and after alcohol
with many struggling with addiction like I
did, i'm forever grateful and blessed to be
here sober, healthy, happy and honest with
you guys.

The PROMISES as written in the Big Book
of AA will and do come true is we work for
them. And they have for me slowly but surely.
aasharon90 is online now  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to aasharon90 For This Useful Post:
CousinA (07-17-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), tomsteve (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:16 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Hears The Voice
 
Nonsensical's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,647
Blog Entries: 20
I went to my first AA meeting in 1990. I started living sober in 2014. I never kept track, but I would guess I 'quit' about 500 times during those 24 years. Maybe more.

I thought about quitting every day. When I started thinking about living sober things got better in a hurry.
Nonsensical is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Nonsensical For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), IOAA2 (07-17-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), tomsteve (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:28 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: eastern USA
Posts: 85,311
Blog Entries: 32
I relapsed too many times to count before finally getting sober for good.
least is online now  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to least For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), Dee74 (07-15-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:33 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
10 years sober.
Never had a relapse before. In order to have one of them relapses I would have had to have some time without a drink and had some changes happening in my life. I never had that. I don't even count the 30 or so days I didn't drink a long time ago as time sober. No changes. I was just dry. So I didn't relapse. I just started drinking again.
tomsteve is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), brynn (07-15-2015), courage2 (07-15-2015), CousinA (07-17-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), IOAA2 (07-17-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015), MythOfSisyphus (07-18-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:37 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ultramarathoner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,175
I had many failed attempts at moderation in its many and varied forms over the course of five years.

I made a firm decision to become entirely alcohol free about one year ago and have not drank since.

We're all on individual journeys and there's no universal way to succeede. I admire your perserverence!
Ultramarathoner is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Ultramarathoner For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), brynn (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:39 AM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
ccam1973's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Yep, tough one to answer. I've been sober 12 months now.

I spent 21 years drinking heavily. The first 10 I knew I needed to quit but didn't really try. The next 9 I thought about trying, woke up every morning and swore I wouldn't drink that night... each night I convinced myself I deserved a drink. The last two years I gave up on quitting, drank around the clock and didn't care about quitting.

Then I found SR and gave it a good try to quit. Two or three relapses and then I went 9 months sober. Relapsed for one year then quit again.

Now I'm one year sober.

You can do this. It's a tough battle, but there are plenty of success stories here to help motivate you.

Stay strong Nick.
ccam1973 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to ccam1973 For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 05:50 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
 
Saskia's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 12,019
I started occasional binge drinking when I was 21 and had trouble with limits almost right away. I had some long sober spells, the last good one was for 13 years. I relapsed after gastric bypass surgery when I had a single glass of wine. That led to about a year of daily drinking, maxing out at a regular-sized bottle of wine per day. Since then, I've been on SR.

I'm one of those people who kept on relapsing over and over. I took Dee's advice to heart when he asked "What else do you need to add?" It took me two years of regularly adding more tools (and becoming increasingly frustrated and discouraged!). Finally I went back to my favorite pdoc who gently maneuvered me into an intensive outpatient addiction program. Between SR, AA, the outpatient program and a whole lot of support I finally managed to stay sober almost a year ago. I had one brief setback a few months ago when my PTSD seriously kicked in but quickly got right back to routine. I now have a med to take if that happens. If the outpatient program didn't do the trick, I was fully prepared to do inpatient rehab.

I now finally feel quite solid and look forward to continuing to live a clean, sober and joyous life.
Saskia is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Saskia For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015), Jsbodhi (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 07:32 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
I decided on march 16, 2014. Since then I had a couple of drinks once in early May.... Relapse doesn't have to be part of it, at all. Don't be complacent. My relapse taught me to ALWAYS be vigilant and work on recovery everyday. I had 13 months and I let my guard down and my AV "got me". I didn't do what was needed and I fell. All me, my choice.

I was able to get back on the wagon but that's the thing you never know, what the next time brings and it is a dangerous game to play.

Don't get me wrong. For YEARS I said I needed to quit, but once I made the desicion and became proactive (did the work) it was on.

Engage as much as you can. Live recovery, read, research and participate. It's a great life and you can make it what you want it to be.
Nowsthetime is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Nowsthetime For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), Carla71 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 07:43 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
 
firstymer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
In the midst of horrible hangovers, I am sure I said "I will never drink again" maybe a thousand times.

But I never seriously tried to quiet until I joined SR, two years ago. I chose the name "firstymer", because it was my first serious attempt at quitting. I haven't had a drink since the day I joined here.

My point is this: If you have committed to stay sober, you may fail. And if you do, you figure out why you failed and adjust your plan. But, just because this may be your first serious attempt to quit, it doesn't mean you are destined to fail the first few times you try. I am living proof, sober proof, of that fact. And if I can do it, trust me, anyone can do it.
firstymer is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to firstymer For This Useful Post:
4stars (07-15-2015), aasharon90 (07-15-2015), DitzyDandelion (07-17-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 07:58 AM
  # 19 (permalink)  
Almost 700 years sober
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 66,887
Blog Entries: 4
I dont know i didnt count but it took me 3 months from the point i said im alcoholic & tried to get sober
Soberwolf is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Soberwolf For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), hopscotch123 (07-15-2015), JD4010 (07-15-2015)
Old 07-15-2015, 08:18 AM
  # 20 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,200
Blog Entries: 1
I haven't since I started AA

I've been around long enough to see what the end results are to the people that do.
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to CAPTAINZING2000 For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2015), CousinA (07-17-2015), tomsteve (07-15-2015)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:51 AM.