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Old 07-11-2015, 01:31 PM
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Aa

Hello all,
I'm approaching a month on this site and in sobriety and have had a difficult time with it lately. Your posts at SR have been my lifeline as I don't discuss my "quit" with anyone in my daily life.
The idea of AA has always been anathema to me. It sounded just awful, frankly. As I have been on this site, being strengthened daily by other's shares, I have begun to contemplate the idea of attending a meeting.
So...last night I looked up meetings, found one where I would hopefully not run into one of the thousands of clients I have worked with over the years, chose a 6:00 a.m. meeting hoping normal folks would be asleep etc...
I got to the building, an old school, and walked up to the door, saw a few guys making coffee, and walked straight out the way I came. Stood outside for a few minutes as more folks arrived and finally willed myself back to the room.
When I walked in, just prior to the start of things, I was immediately approached by several guys (all male group) who asked me to join them. There was a lot of B.S.'ing going round and I felt fairly out of place. Once the meeting began, however, I realized how badly I had needed this for many years. Heartfelt story after heartfelt story, camraderie, real stuff just poured out of these guys. I found myself introducing myself, as an alcoholic, (first time I've said the word in public) and then basically crying in front of a bunch of strangers.
I cannot adequately express the "coming home" feeling that enveloped me. I am going to attempt to make a meeting a day for the next while and to really immerse myself in the process.
I credit this online, completely anonymous band of souls, for giving me the strength to do this.
Thanks all.
d
p.s. two past clients were there....didn't feel uncomfortable at all.
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Old 07-11-2015, 01:43 PM
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Aww, thank you so much for sharing this; it brought tears to my eyes, it was so beautiful. I'm back in AA for the second time and it has always felt to me as you described it: like "coming home". Stories like yours, and seeing the change in newcomers is just one of the things I love about this program.
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Old 07-11-2015, 01:50 PM
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Really glad to hear that you have found a comfortable place to get better. Hope you can continue to share with us here on SR too!
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Old 07-11-2015, 01:50 PM
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I'm glad you had a positive experience.
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Old 07-11-2015, 01:55 PM
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Sounds like a great experience
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Old 07-11-2015, 02:19 PM
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I'm glad you got such a lot out of it. That's one more tool for your recovery toolbox.

Congrats on a month sober!
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Old 07-11-2015, 02:25 PM
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There is nothing like connecting with a bunch of people who are screwed up in the same way that I am. (and fixing it!)

Great stuff, thanks for posting!
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Old 07-11-2015, 02:47 PM
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Welcome to the fellowship Don.

I wanted to attend AA for a long time before I found the courage to go.All that time I continued to drink and it got worse and worse.

Since my first meeting I have had no desire to drink.I hope you find yourself a sponsor to guide you through the steps.

Wishing you well.
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Old 07-11-2015, 03:21 PM
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That was a really moving post bud im really happy for you DonTalon
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Old 07-11-2015, 04:02 PM
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I needed this so much today. Thanks for posting this - really inspiring.
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Old 07-11-2015, 04:09 PM
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Your post gave me goosebumps. I have the exact same story. Came here first, decided to try AA (being a huge sceptic), ended up feeling part of a big family. Incredible.

...and saying those words - "I'm Stella, I'm an alcoholic"? So scary and such catharsis at the same time.

I'm coming clean about my relapse next meeting, and I know I'll be met with all the understanding and support I need to make it the last one.
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Old 07-11-2015, 04:15 PM
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Originally Posted by DonTolan47 View Post

Heartfelt story after heartfelt story, camraderie, real stuff just poured out of these guys. I found myself introducing myself, as an alcoholic, (first time I've said the word in public) and then basically crying in front of a bunch of strangers.
I'm happy for you and understand. AA has helped me a lot over many years. Yes, I owe those rooms plenty. To bad so many wish not to give AA a chance. It is for many who wish to recover, a very good tool to have.
Enjoy yourself and stay sober -- it's the best life for us.

MM
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Old 07-11-2015, 05:15 PM
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Awesome! Nice thread, glad you're here and there!

Keep coming back.....
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Old 07-11-2015, 05:22 PM
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Don,

I felt the same way when I went in. I got teary eyed when I heard the stories and just recognized parts of me. Leaving the meeting it gave me hope. I'm going to try to hit Monday's meeting and try to get there early to chat with people early. I didn't get that chance on Friday.
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Old 07-11-2015, 07:16 PM
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Your experience with AA sounds like mine. I avoided it for years. When I finally got desperate enough to try it, the sense of relief at my first meeting was huge. Being part of a fellowship with other guys who understand, in combination with this website has been a key part of my sobriety plan for over 5 years now.
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Old 07-11-2015, 07:19 PM
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Glad you went. We're all there to save our lives
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Old 07-11-2015, 07:49 PM
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Many theories about how and why it works but works it does just ask the 60k+ people at the latest convention in Atlanta.

AA literally saved my life and gave gave me a life better than anything I could have dreamed.

Just keep coming back
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Old 07-11-2015, 08:33 PM
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I went to my first AA meeting many years ago. I went to about 3 or 4 before I got the courage to get out of my car and go into the meeting. At the end of that first meeting many of the people said to me "Hope to see you back tomorrow night." Unbeknownst to me, I walked into a meeting that met 7 nights per week. I kept going back. I remember thinking, when I was about 90 days sober, "If I'm going to drink I better do it now because if I hang around much longer those people will come looking for me." I didn't drink and I kept going back. I moved at about 4 years sober and never went back to that meeting. I drank at 6 years sober. I NEED meetings and it seems the more meetings I attend, the more meetings I need. Enjoy the comfort and acceptance of a judgment free gathering of like minded people.
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Old 07-11-2015, 09:07 PM
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Thank you for the post and I'm glad you had a good experience DonTolan. I felt awkward when I first walked up to my first meeting. But once I went inside, it felt like asylum. I had an entire hour of freedom. It's only gotten better as time has gone on.

Well done.
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Old 07-11-2015, 09:47 PM
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I was the same way Don. I was totally reluctant to go to AA because I wasn't even sure if I was an alcoholic, but I did have a desire to quit drinking and that was all that was required to attend AA. It makes staying sober so much easier. I go to really fun meetings and we laugh our arses off lots of the time. Just being there, healthy and living in the moment and showing what the promises of AA look like is such a blessing for those new to recovery who are struggling. It gives hope. It's pretty much a big part of my social life after several years of sobriety and that would have sounded horrible to me prior to quitting drinking. It isn't horrible at all. I think this is what they are talking about when they say "wait for the miracle to happen."
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