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-   -   so ashamed (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/371264-so-ashamed.html)

sarahdub 07-09-2015 01:40 AM

so ashamed
 
I always mess up when I drink but my friend and her mom aren't talkin to me and annoyed because I went back to hers drunk other night and peed the bed ruined mattress everything. Im so upset iv had a panic atta k and I just dont know how to go on

JamesAdams 07-09-2015 01:43 AM

Me too, I make a total mess of things when I drink. Hence why I am making another attempt to stop. Today is my first day without a drink, want to join me?

FeelingGreat 07-09-2015 02:01 AM

Sara, I can understand how you feel. What can you do about it? Your friends will forgive you if you can stay sober.
How about making an appointment with the doctor and telling him/her about it? If you feel ashamed, think about how much worse you'll feel by going on the way you are now.

sarahdub 07-09-2015 02:16 AM

Thanks for writing back this time last year I.attended AA for about a month but didnt last long. I have gaps in between my v bad episodes and makes me forget and its just a horrible cycle. I am goin to try to start today james thanks.

FarToGo 07-09-2015 03:17 AM

There's plenty of us have done things when drunk, we'd much rather hadn't happened. I wince when I remember some of the stuff I've done, even from years ago. Worse than messing a friend's bed I promise.
Maybe use the feelings as a motivation to be sober today?
I wish you love and luck.

xx

FreeOwl 07-09-2015 03:56 AM

Go on by changing.

Make it up, by no longer being that person.

Relieve yourself of the shame by becoming a person you can forgive.

They will, too.

It's not as horrible as it feels right now. Stop drinking. Choose sobriety.

If you so, this will fade into the past and your shame will fade along with the memory.... Those around you will respect and love and honor you and nobody will carry the memory of a soiled mattress because the person responsible for that will have been replaced.

ultradad 07-09-2015 04:06 AM

Sarah, if that's the worst you've done while drinking, you're not too bad, my friend. Friends forgive and those who don't never were friends. Hey, I've peed all over things when drunk before! AA has worked wonders for me, not for everyone, but maybe give it another go.

All the best!

sarahdub 07-09-2015 04:46 AM

Thanks so mych I didnt think people would really reply trying to get thru work those messages helpd

CaseyW 07-09-2015 08:10 AM

You go on one day at a time, sarahdub. Use this incident as a reminder when thoughts of "my drinking wasn't so bad" start creeping in. But don't beat yourself up too bad--there's a better life waiting for you in true recovery.

Remember that you don't have to take that first drink today no matter what. And as long as you don't take that first drink, you can't take the second or third or tenth drink that will almost inevitably follow.

Wishing you the best today...

MIRecovery 07-09-2015 09:40 AM

The wonderful thing about sobriety is being able to say, "I'm not that person anymore. "

Anna 07-09-2015 09:46 AM

Sarah, I think one of the hardest things in early recovery is accepting that we can't always fix the messes we've made while drinking. You are not alone in feeling ashamed of your behaviour when you were drinking. Clearly, you can't change what happened, but why not use the emotions you feel to make sure this never happens again.

We're here for you.

CeeFarro 07-09-2015 10:03 AM

I peed the bed at a friends house once. In her beautiful down sleigh bed in her theater room at her gorgeous house...on Thanksgiving. Not the worst thing I've done but was still embarrassing. Nothing like that has happened since I've been sober..Do you want to stop drinking? Stick around here..we get it and we care:)

thomas11 07-09-2015 10:14 AM

Hi Saradub, you said you don't know how to go on. People here will help you answer that question. Stick around and read daily, it has helped many many people. As you've read, you wet the bed, you're not the first and won't be the last. Forgive yourself and think about taking steps towards sobriety and it doesn't have to happen again. best wishes to you.

sva777 07-09-2015 10:24 AM

Hey, we all have done stupid stuff while drunk. My wife told me I once pulled down my pants in the living room and pissed in the middle of the rug. I don't remember because I was blackout drunk. I don't drink anymore so I don't have to worry about those stupid things happening anymore. She did forgive me and your friend will too if you are honest and choose to get better.

Wholesome 07-09-2015 11:21 AM

I was once at a beer and cocktail show at a convention center and I was so drunk that I didn't realize that the seat was down in the portopotty so when I tried to squat and pee it splashed off the seat and all over me!! I had to tie my sweater around my waist to cover up my pee stained cloths and bee line it out of there and into a taxi home! I was so embarrassed. I didn't even say goodbye to anyone I just split.

Lots of us have been there. Quit drinking and you never have to be there again.

Hevyn 07-09-2015 11:26 AM

Good to have you with us, Sarah. :)

That's why I had to stop all together. I could never be sure what would happen once it was in my system. Once in awhile (rarely) I'd be ok - but usually I put myself in embarrassing & dangerous situations. It's just not worth it. I hope you'll keep reading and posting. We can help.

Nowsthetime 07-09-2015 11:28 AM

Hello:

Let this be your turning point. I acted out infront of my inlaws at my daughter's 3rd bday party. She was in bed, but still. The thing is that I am not that anymore. I completely used it for fuel to quit and I still do. I don't want to be that person ever again.

Commit to it and make it happen.

CristinaN 07-09-2015 11:31 AM

I can totally relate. I have embarrassed myself many times but no more. Welcome. Stick close and keep posting. The people on this site are so warm and helpful.

Surrender2win 07-09-2015 11:32 AM

Hi Sarah! I'm sure all of us have done silly stupid things while drunk that we would rather forget (including peeing in places other than the toilet)!! This won't happen when you're sober. Welcome and good luck on your journey.

PurpleKnight 07-09-2015 11:44 AM

Don't beat yourself.we can't change the past, but we can write a better future!! :)


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