Notices

Cycles

Old 07-06-2015, 05:31 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 11
Cycles

Hello all,

Been a lurker for a while, this is my latest attempt at quitting alcohol.

I'm in my early 30s, primarily a weekend warrior type drinker. I won't feel any real strong desire to drink until Friday night comes around but then if I have a drink I will keep going until I pass out usually. Then probably repeat it Saturday and if I start on Sunday I'll end up phoning in sick Monday. Lots of money spent over the years, embarrassment, injuries, risk taking with drink driving etc.

The last few years have seen this cycle get worse, my partner is running out of patience I think. There's no discernable concrete thing that makes me start up again after stopping, I guess enough time passes to forget the feeling that makes me quit. If insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result then I guess I'm insane...

I'm hoping being more active here will help me to keep it up this time, I struggle with impulsive actions generally and just need a mental check before I go to the off licence.
upontheroof is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 05:36 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 984
Welcome upontheroof, my drinking patterns share some similarities to yours and I'm only a few years younger than you.

I know what you mean about the embarrassment and injuries, it really is the worst thing and totally not worth it. I've now gotten 20 sober weekends under my belt and I'm so happy to be off that hamster wheel and truly living and enjoying my weekends.

You'll find lots of support here. Glad to have you!
nymets86 is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 05:39 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ruby2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
That's tough. Breaking the cycle. It can be done though. I had to get through the first few times that I wanted a drink to set myself on the road to sobriety. Are you looking to stop entirely? For me that was the only way. I can't stop at just one so not picking up that first drink is crucial.

Stick around and make a plan. Read and post. Welcome to SR
Ruby2 is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 05:41 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 11
20 weekends sounds amazing, 8 is my previous best.

I think learning to enjoy things without drinking is the trick for me. Social anxiety makes going out anywhere with lots of people a challenge sober, boredom is a trigger for me too.
upontheroof is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 05:42 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Ruby2 View Post
That's tough. Breaking the cycle. It can be done though. I had to get through the first few times that I wanted a drink to set myself on the road to sobriety. Are you looking to stop entirely? For me that was the only way. I can't stop at just one so not picking up that first drink is crucial.

Stick around and make a plan. Read and post. Welcome to SR
Yeah I think I have enough experience to say definitely that 1 is too many, having to stop drinking once I've started feels horrendous
upontheroof is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 06:02 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Formerly Ringthedoorbell
 
Quirky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Georgia
Posts: 402
Welcome UOTR,
We are glad you are here with us. You will find so much support and caring here at SR. Be sure to read and post often, doing that has really helped me. Remember, it's just one hour, one day at a time... Good luck to you.
Quirky is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 07:42 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Do your best
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Welcome to SR
Soberwolf is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 08:32 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,330
Breaking the cycle is hard, but crucial to recovery. You need to take that leap of faith and do something specifically different on Friday evening.
Anna is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 02:28 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Hi upontheroof, many of us are/were in the same boat. What I struggled with was that many alcoholics can't have that first drink, because it only stops when complete disaster strikes whether it be days or months...or years. With us weekend warriors, we put down the drink every single week, so it can be done... and often. But binge drinking I'm starting to believe is every bit as bad or worse than the everyday drinker. Anyway, it appears you see a problem and are trying to fix it. best of luck to you.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 04:00 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,048
Hi and welcome upontheroof

you have a few days now before Friday - what about making a plan for next weekend?

this link is a great starting point

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
Dee74 is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 04:02 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Community Greeter
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,416
It's so good to have you with us, Upontheroof. You'll find plenty of encouragement and understanding here.
Hevyn is offline  
Old 07-06-2015, 06:43 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
Angie247's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
Welcome! Staying close to SR has really helped me so much.
Angie247 is offline  
Old 07-07-2015, 10:14 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
PurpleKnight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Welcome to the Forum!!
PurpleKnight is offline  
Old 07-09-2015, 07:33 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 11
Thanks for all the words of wisdom.

Well my partner and I have a trip coming up this weekend so drinking Friday night isn't an option anyway, she's very keen for me to stop drinking and will be helping to keep me motivated so should all be good.

Just got to fight the old mindset that holiday = drinking holiday and I can actually enjoy myself without it. Driving to restaurants etc will help.
upontheroof is offline  
Old 07-09-2015, 08:51 AM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 122
Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
Hi upontheroof, many of us are/were in the same boat. What I struggled with was that many alcoholics can't have that first drink, because it only stops when complete disaster strikes whether it be days or months...or years. With us weekend warriors, we put down the drink every single week, so it can be done... and often. But binge drinking I'm starting to believe is every bit as bad or worse than the everyday drinker. Anyway, it appears you see a problem and are trying to fix it. best of luck to you.
Binge drinking allows you to fool yourself into thinking you're not a problem drinker but the cycle of withdrawal leads to kindling which means you are eventually physically unable to stop without pretty serious medical attention.

In other words "spree" drinking is just a phase that alcoholics go through.
lighter is offline  
Old 07-09-2015, 08:59 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
 
FreeOwl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by upontheroof View Post
Hello all, Been a lurker for a while, this is my latest attempt at quitting alcohol. I'm in my early 30s, primarily a weekend warrior type drinker. I won't feel any real strong desire to drink until Friday night comes around but then if I have a drink I will keep going until I pass out usually. Then probably repeat it Saturday and if I start on Sunday I'll end up phoning in sick Monday. Lots of money spent over the years, embarrassment, injuries, risk taking with drink driving etc. The last few years have seen this cycle get worse, my partner is running out of patience I think. There's no discernable concrete thing that makes me start up again after stopping, I guess enough time passes to forget the feeling that makes me quit. If insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result then I guess I'm insane... I'm hoping being more active here will help me to keep it up this time, I struggle with impulsive actions generally and just need a mental check before I go to the off licence.
hhis is a pretty good description of where I was in my early thirties... It got two DUIs, two divorces and a whole lot of misery worse before I finally chose sobriety.

Stick around here and give sobriety a honest go.... I think you'll find it far preferable to a decade of diminishing returns and awful consequences
FreeOwl is offline  
Old 07-09-2015, 10:49 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by lighter View Post
Binge drinking allows you to fool yourself into thinking you're not a problem drinker but the cycle of withdrawal leads to kindling which means you are eventually physically unable to stop without pretty serious medical attention.

In other words "spree" drinking is just a phase that alcoholics go through.
What you said has been my problem. I'm even fully aware that I'm fooling myself. Kindling is a just a theory! haha.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 07-14-2015, 01:59 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 11
So quitting just before a vacation was a bad idea, suffice to say that I still cannot drink in moderation. Brought a case of beer yesterday to "last a few days", this morning there are 12 empty bottles...

Could be worse I suppose, other than feeling tired I haven't done anything too dumb. Back on the abstinence horse for the rest of the week.

And forever would be nice.
upontheroof is offline  
Old 07-14-2015, 02:28 AM
  # 19 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,048
You can make it forever, up - just depends on how much effort you want to put in...

D
Dee74 is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:32 AM.