Change4good

Hi All,

Curious to hear from those who have had lasting sobriety. How did you get there? What was your "plan" if you had one?

Dee, if you are up for sharing, I would like to hear what your path was. I know you didn't do AA, and am curious about your approach.

Thanks in advance.

least

I saw an addiction counselor for several years. She was very helpful to me, not just in sobriety but life in general. Along with daily visits to SR. I no longer see her but I visit SR several times a day. It reinforces my desire to stay sober by coming here.

Dee74

This is something I wrote recently - it's part of the 'what we did' sticky and it's my plan ethos if you like.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post5420510

this is also from the stickys - it's my plan in a little more detail.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post2531003

Really tho, your plan should be your plan - thats the value of making a plan.

I really recommend this link again for helping you, or anyone, come up with a plan for you

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf

you can do this C4G

Change4good

Thanks Dee. Your link was incredibly helpful, and I dove into it while in treatment. I am sober and hopeful today.

Soberwolf

Exellent & on a side note the exellent links are now highlighted clearly

My plan consisted of Journalling day to day experiences feelings & thoughts, i started keeping & making Dr apts & let my Dr know what was happening, I went to group therapy 3-4 days pw for months it really helped, i was attending mtns at least 5pw in the beginning i just sat listened & absorbed what was being said, i signed up for 2 short college courses and passed, if i ever felt cravings i reached out no matter what and said im struggling, i made the effort to go see ppl rather than them seeing me going the extra mile helps a lot, i practiced patience, i tried binaural beats, i learned how to meditate & other breathing exercises

It all helps but the biggest tool i have in my plan ?

Acceptance

LDT

I saw an addictions therapist and threw myself into a health regimen of walking, yoga and clean eating. I also read and journaled and listened to those with more sober time than myself. I am now happily and officially 2 1/2 years sober and have begun training for a half marathon.

OnMyWay7

I hit these boards a lot and take an antiabuse when I think I'm going to be in a situation that is tempting. So far so good. IN 6 months I had one sip (yes one) and that was months ago.

OneLessLonely

I started by reading here multiple times per day and joining that month's "class thread," posting at least once per day and really got to know the people in my class. I had this site open on my phone at all times to peek in as needed. I made sober plans for my worst trigger times- walking, bookstore, coffee shop, movies, reading, out with friends not drinking. I bought numerous non-alcoholic drinks- both for at home, to bring to places, and while out. I let myself have whatever treat I wanted that wasn't alcoholic- candy, ice cream, chips, new clothes. I said no to any plans that involved alcohol- for awhile, until I knew in my heart I could go and not drink, and even then it wasn't right into a wedding or a party. It was like out with friends who would have a drink, and then up and up. I said goodbye to friendships that were centered around drinking. I remained open to adding to and changing parts of my plan to better suit sobriety. I ALWAYS posted here first when I was getting nervous about certain plans or if I wanted to drink. And I had to realize that it was imperative to not care that people might have disagreed with my new life decisions. There really and truly is nothing more important than whatever I had to do or not do to maintain sobriety. That was really hard to believe in the beginning but it's true.

zjw

"if you want to make god laugh tell him about your plans"

I had none. I had no idea anything. I basicly white knuckled it the first year. But I devoured any kind of information I could on this short of going to AA or coming here or something. 6 months in I changed my diet and started exercising becuase I felt terrible still.

Now I dont really have a plan but I try and keep a routine. My routine consists of daily running or walking. Enjoying the scenery as much as possible. Eating good and playing with my kids and such. I try to stick to things that make me stay happy.

Some issues I have however is if my routine has to get altered I dont like having to adapt. It can really throw me into a tizzy. This has me wondering if there is some deeper issue going on but I do try work with the situations that arise as I know this is just life.

I try and come here and I try to read inspireing stuff daily. I also realize that its a work in progress for me to keep my head above water and not end up back in the pit of depression and despair. I realize there is no magical cure that this is just going to be an ongoing process for me and I"m accepting of that. If at some point I'm magically cured and feel great with little effort hey great but till then I have to work at it and i'm ok with that.

greens

My first 6 months was just therapy and changing my surroundings. Got really busy and joined some classes and other groups.

Soberwolf

Since joining this site i have to add how much the mods have helped me always on hand with the greatest of advice

Dee, Anna & Opivotal in particular have helped me massively they respond to my questions on recovery & are always kind fair helpful and wise not to mention i see them as close trusted friends because i know can trust them completly i have loads of wise friends on SR but in all honesty if you want great advice i would ask them thier experience & advice is legendary & it inspires me to be a better person

Ultramarathoner

1. Accountability. I told my 10 year old that I was choosing to become alcohol free for health reasons. Modifying that commitment in any way is counter to everything I'm trying to instill in him.

2. Accepting Forever Immediately. While counter to many approaches, this was freeing to me as I didn't need to put any emotional energy into thinking about drinking in the future.

3. The Power of Choice. I can drink. I choose not to. This view Is not a punishment.

4. Team August 2014. A core group of dedicated, passionate souls sharing this epic quest.

5. Ultra Marathon training to reinforce my healthy lifestyle and celebrate my changes.

Saskia

zjw wrote "...I don't really have a plan" and then described actions taken - sounds like a plan to me ��

I use whatever is safe and legal and works and that includes SR, an intensive outpatient program, AA, a psychotherapist and now meds. It's been a long and rocky road but I finally feel comfortable that I will continue to succeed.

Fly N Buy

Not sure how you want to quantify lasting sobriety, but I will tell you how I got to a year.

I went to an AA meeting about everyday. I embraced the program of recovery and the book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

I felt better on some days - walked out mad on other days. Felt like tossing it in more than once. Nothing I did was perfect I don't recommend the exact way I did things to anyone, ever.

I did one thing perfectly though - I did not drink and have not changed my sobriety date. Good days or bad I am an alcoholic. If I want a chance at any sort of life I needed to stop and stay stopped.

I think overall do what cause you to have action and not just passive thoughts. This idea of action helped me.

You came to the right place - lot's of templates for how to. Can't wait for you to share your experiences in sobriety

digdug

When I went to rehab, I learned the importance of a plan.

I remember one of the counselors made me this promise: I will stay sober if I do the following:

1. Go to an AA meeting the first day I get out and continue daily meetings for at least 90 days
2. Get a sponsor
3. Work the steps
4. Get in service
5. Don't f'ing pick up a drink

I always have a tendency to overcomplicate things, so I needed it broken down for me to the simplest level.

I did all of the above. I also did 6 months of IOP after I got out of inpatient and joined SR.

Currently, I go to about 3 meetings a week. Even though I've been through the steps, I still meet with my sponsor regularly. I am active in service as the secretary for my home group. I also sponsor men and take meetings to rehabs and psych units.

Even though I don't post as much here as I used to in early sobriety, I still read a few threads daily here on SR.

And most importantly, I don't f'ing pick up a drink. Haven't done that in over two years.

Marcher13

I didn't use any specific tools other than SR which I lived on in the early months. For me (I stress me, not others) the reasons I drank were not relevant, I knew I drank too much and I knew I was ruining my health and brain power.

I mainly drank in the evenings so that was where I had to introduce change. I changed where I sat at home, what I did (I took up knitting again), I made sure to eat a good evening meal without leaving myself hungry, I poured a soft drink I liked before 6pm.

When the cravings hit I weathered through them -- not white knuckling exactly --but I knew they would be strong so I got busy or came to SR.

I remain vigilant -- 5.30-6.30pm is my critical time, I come to SR every day to remind myself and to pay back the help I was given. I save the money I used to spend on alcohol and put in an account. I walk and cycle to keep fit.

I'm still knitting (see my avatar) and have now racked up seven blankets for charity along with other items, I'm healthier than I have been in years.

In our house we have two moderate drinkers so I am not without temptation but I've drawn a mental line, they can drink, I can't. It's like my young seven year old friend who has allergies -- he can't have egg, dairy or nuts or he becomes so ill he must be hospitalised. I'm the same except that I am 60 and for me it's alcohol.

tomsteve

Before anything I received a gift- desperation. The pain of getting drunk had finally exceeded the pain of reality. Gave myself two choices-AA or suicide.
I chose AA. Went to a meeting. Got the big book, read it. Prayed. Went to a meeting, read the big book. Started doing what it said( the results of what would happen if I did what it said sounded pretty dam good,). Fought the mental obsession. Went to meetings,prayed....and repeated.
Been working pretty good so far for me.
Me and my life keep gettin better,too!

DrunkenDonuts

I've only been sober a few months but my plan is more along the medical line of things.

When I chose to quit drinking I decided to go on medication so I couldn't drink without severe consequences. I took that medication for a couple of months without fail and a couple of times when I felt really tempted I came here and got help.

Now days I only take the medication if I know there is an event coming up which used to trigger my drinking. It means there will definitely be bad consequences and I can't just take the chance that it will be fine.

Over the months I've also gone to group counselling once a week to help with anxiety and dealing with normal day to day stuff. Trying to change my thought pattern to a better one.

Yarrgh. So that's how I'm doing it.

PurpleKnight

Keep it simple, mine started with daily check in times for SR, when I awoke, my lunch break at work, when I arrived home and before bed, never undervalue the importance of support to keep you focused on the task at hand, and then slowly I included other things, long walks in the evenings, having some me time on my sundays, new activities, new hobbies!!

You can do this!!