Aiko

I done it! put my hand up!
did not reach a year, is just a small cheat a very very small joint!
Bad news It shall not be
If I continue tomorrow...
Another worst mistakes !
When did I start????
I hope no one noticed...!!!

Is a very very important day tomorrow,
I could not even wait to pass it and then crash!
I got to be sharp and bright I got to give in my notice to the company,
Is going to be very unpleasant, It has been years of friendship!
am leaving for a higher position in a firm and I am f@@@@@@!!!!!
I am really scared is a mayor jump!

Muscle contractions tensionnnn for weeks, starded in the neack and is gone down, have not sleept well for days...
I had an anxiety attack at work ... so my lie; I had to....
I had made my head days ago... that´s it ; I give up can not control my impulses, just give innnnnn... over!

And now my selfish side wants to get it out of the chest!
O poor me done it again...
Sorry to come hereTomorrow I shall stop I promise myself!

saoutchik

Aiko

We have all been where you are and know what you are going through

Keep posting and let people know how you are feeling

trachemys

AIKO!

One little mistake? Forgive yourself. Get on with life.

Really good to see you. I was just wondering about you yesterday. You sound good.

Aiko

I can not relax my back....
feel the muscle between the scapulas contracted from the neck...

trachemys

Wish I could give you a back rub.

How is everything?

BlissWithin

As others said, the important thing is to keep posting and dont let this slip become a major relapse, you can do this.

Dee74

I agree with everyone else - forgive yourself - you cannot undo the past.
It's very important you get back on track tho - give that all your effort Aiko

Best wishes with giving your notice and the new job
D

Aiko

I gone now...
tomorrow up 7
need to sleep... tomorrow shower and make up and coffee coffee ...
my heart will be very bad tomorrow...
It will come out my mouth ... pumping

I do not know how I will pick the phone... heart pummmmm say yes...
then gather the bosses, but the the ::LLLLJJLKJ ch.
she will found out second hand...

God how say I say I am leaving...
It is going to break hearts but I have to move up,

And then driveeeeeeeeeeeeee ...
My doc´s appointment....
I will walk looking at the floor...
she is going to be ¿¿¿¿OIUOUOu

Driveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee and do not smoke any or overtake pills...

I Actually deverve it! hopefuly it will srink in in 24 hr.
Or start the weell!!!

PurpleKnight

Don't beat yourself up Aiko!! Go at it again!!

trachemys

Aiko, you will be OK! Strong woman! Sober!

Dee74

It's ok to move on to something better aiko, even if some people are upset for now.

You'll get through it

D

Aiko

Thank you just needed to speak
I work constantly and can not slowdown now!
And the uncertainty what step next???
So can Not have a holiday know...
All those free dais lost!
For not facing been on my own,
What An IDIOT , lost nearly a year!!!

I am compulsive with b### everything!?
Now when I constraing doing stufffff
I reword myself with shopping.....
Well Not working obiouly
Tomorrow... Yes or Yes!
God the head just goes on and on @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Everithing will be OK

Like or not

Anna

I hope you feel better, Aiko.

trachemys

Aiko, a little slip is a little slip.
Not something you want to repeat
Not the end of the world
You'll be OK
Love you

greens

What else have you tried for your Back pain? I know it's frustrating finding some thing when youre in so much pain. For me it was important to have my routines (stretching) ibuprofen and turmeric for pain etc. Bc when I skip those things a pill sounded nice.....and justified

Hevyn

Thinking of you Aiko.

Serenidad

Hang in there Aiko!

kgr

Praying for you - you will get through this!

Aiko

Sorry just to say that I giving in my notice,
firt the tops and the gather all my colleagues... all mouth open!!!
So 15 days hearing wispers, looks and envies and my friends hugging me we will miss you so much... I have to say goobie to so many people...
you wait the clients find ouuuutttttt



Unfortunately am
still at it!
And in the evening the doc. told offff
So I am going to stop again...
and will try new meds treatment.

She aked me to empty the house
I no way!!!
I made my mind up I leave it at home for later!!!
I planned once I park the car..... freedom!
I f@@@@@@ it anywayyyy!

So just got to finish all I got tonight!
and Dust myself up
Tomorrow...

Got a new oportunity in life I got to be sharp and bright!
Can not turn up half brain sleeping explaing accounts to Norwegian
that would be fun!!!

So tomorrow will start from = 0
capable to stop....
I can not afford right now a long relapse....
With blanks in my head when people talk to me.

What an Idiot I thought only one.... only one more...

Start all pleiajgflajfieojfal over again

Gilmer

If you use the rest tonight, you'll probably still be in bad shape tomorrow. Just stop now.

Every little bit you take increases the odds of a full-on binge that you might not be able to stop.

You don't want to be back where you were before.