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Old 06-17-2015, 06:02 AM
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New here


I just wanted to stick my head in and say hello. Today marks one week without alcohol for me. I will post more when I am not so busy, but I have always been a drinker - grew up in a house with two alcoholic parents, and social life involved drinking. I moved from the UK to the USA in 2006, and with the change in lifestyle really did not drink because it was not part of my life here. However, 3 years ago, my relationship broke down, I was homeless for a short time with a 5 year old, was a student and not allowed to work on my visa. In the stress I turned to alcohol, and despite fixing the problems, alcohol stuck around, and I found this year I was drinking 8-10 beers a night. Decided most of my current issues result from alcohol - I have put on 20 pounds, drink alone at home and was avoiding social interaction.

So, I said enough, reached out to a sober friend. Have replaced an evening of drinking alone, to an evening hiking and exploring local parks with my sober buddy. Feeling a little fragile still, but reading here helped a lot, so thank you!
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Old 06-17-2015, 06:12 AM
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Welcome to the family from a fellow Buckeye. You'll find lots of support here.
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:01 AM
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Welcome to SR and congrats on 1 week!! That's awesome! Read and post often. This place has been a tremendous help for me.
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:01 AM
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Hello and welcome. You'll find lots of support here. And congratlations on a week. Keep it up!
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:09 AM
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Welcome to SR, this place helped me a lot in tough times, I am sure it will help you too!
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:12 AM
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I'm glad you found us.

I love the hiking idea.
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:20 AM
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Welcome, glad you're here - good job on 7 days sober!

When I became truly willing to change, sobriety was within reach I found!

Keep coming back and keep posting
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:48 AM
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Welcome to SR
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Old 06-17-2015, 08:02 AM
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Thank you for the kind words and welcomes!

Yes, the hiking has really helped me - I feel like I am doing something rather than missing out through not drinking, I think if I just stopped drinking, without replacing it I would feel I was losing something, instead I feel I am gaining - fitness, fresh air and fun!

The first few days I pretty much slept the whole time, I became a zombie, now I am finding it hard to get to sleep, but once I am asleep it is a deep sleep.

Last night my 8 year old was really sick - I picked him up from his dad's and he was throwing up the whole 20 minute drive home (luckily dad provided a bucket!). He was sick all night, including all over my bed. In the past I would have stopped on the way home for beer to "cope and stay calm", yet the thought did not cross my mind, I was far more present for him, not to mention if he got severely sick I was perfectly capable to drive him to the hospital. Fortunately he is better today, and I am wondering what we can do - and wondering without worrying about when I can grab a drink!

It really for me has been liking flipping a switch in my thinking - once I did that, it has been easier. Now just to quit the cigarettes! One step at a time!
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Old 06-17-2015, 09:33 AM
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Welcome to the Forum!!
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Old 06-17-2015, 03:24 PM
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Welcome to SR learningagain

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Old 06-17-2015, 04:00 PM
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Welcome Learningagain,
You'll find so much support here from people who understand what you are going through. Read and post often here at SR, it is so beneficial. Lots of kind people with insight and experience to help you along. We are all on this journey together and it's so nice to be able yo talk to someone when you feel the urge to drink.
Wishing you all the best!
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Old 06-17-2015, 04:20 PM
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Thank you again, yes, I am figuring out the forums right now, posting a bit, sure once I get the hang of it I will post more.

Almost through day 8 now, actually first day with my son here, as he was on vacation with his dad. We had a good day. His fish had babies on Sunday, so we spent a lot of the morning watching the babies swimming about in the tank, and also took apart and cleaned the filtration system because it is off due to the new arrivals.

We also went to the store, and managed to avoid the beer section! This afternoon we cleaned the windows, which, thanks to enlisting an 8 year old, are probably more smeared than before!

So, we got through the day - plan was to go swimming, but did not take the risk with him vomiting all night!

I am finding that by tackling a random chore everytime I hear the AV calling, I get past it, and also get things done! Including more laundry than I thought possible thanks to poor son projectile hitting everything! Even he asked how his vomit touched so many things!

Tomorrow we are going camping at a local fishing lake. My sober friend mentioned before is coming too. We love it there - but last time I drank a dozen beers and pretty much passed out, so really looking forward to enjoy ghost stories round the campfire tomorrow. My son is desperate to catch a catfish, and said none of us are sleeping until he gets one, so could be a long night. Hopefully it will stay dry!

On day 8 a few things I have bowels are slowly getting back to normal. A big meal seems to send it all crazy, so eating little and often right now. Also, eating a lot less, I definitely ate because of drinking. I lost 3lbs this week! My skin is looking improved. I suffer from acne and excema and always have (spots at 35 are just wonderful! I just pretend they make me look younger ). But, my skin is definitely looking improved. Probably as I am also taking better care of it...even treated myself to a nice face cream with the money I have saved today, so hopefully will soon stop cracking mirrors.

My son has really enjoyed today...he is hilarious. Hopefully I will appreciate his little sense of humor far more now.

Well, that is enough for tonight. Just showered, so cannot be tempted to pop out for a drink! Oh, and just realized I managed a pick up with my ex (a major trigger usually) without thinking about alcohol yesterday...probably aided by my son throwing up everywhere, which is a little distracting, but still I managed 20 minutes in exes company - even him sitting with me in my car while we helped our son without even hearing a whisper from my AV!!!
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Old 06-17-2015, 04:23 PM
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Hi learningagain - it's great to have you join us. You sound very ready to do this - already, positive things are happening. It'll just keep getting better.

I was much more anxious when I was drinking - I thought it was helping me cope, but it did just the opposite. I'm glad you felt calmer when picking up your son. Sorry he's been sick.
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Old 06-17-2015, 04:31 PM
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Thank you Hevyn. I blame myself and my genes for drinking. I used to hate watching my parents drink and my sister and I often talk about how to get them to slow down (they easily drink between 4-5 bottles of wine a day between them), but that is them, not me.

My ex was a huge problem for me - he has NEVER drunk alcohol, but he would buy me beer, encourage me to drink it, then berate me in front of people for drinking. It was part of many abusive behaviors. Part of his control issues was using what he knew was a weakness to his advantage. So, thank God I am past that. Since we split I would immediately need to drink after talking/seeing him. So, getting through a pick up at his house last night was HUGE!
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Old 06-17-2015, 05:10 PM
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Welcome to SR, learningagain! There is a ton of great wisdom and support to be found here. Make yourself at home!
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Old 06-18-2015, 07:36 AM
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UUrrgghh, had a rough night, time of the month and spent half the night tossing and turning with major cramps . This morning is no better, got up early, had some coffee and now led on the couch with major cramps - my cat is acting as a heating pad on my stomach which is helping though.

About to take some pain killers, and wondering why oh why does the time of the month always come exactly when I am camping? But, I did not drink, even though it is tempting to ease the cramps, but I will stick with advil!
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Old 06-19-2015, 09:33 AM
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Hi Learningagain. Can I just say? You sound like an exceptional person. Any one of the things you've been coping with might have turned anyone to drink, so the fact that you're coming through them and moving on with what sounds like real self-awareness is pretty impressive. And congratulations on your week. Well done!
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Old 06-20-2015, 01:32 AM
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Hi there, learningagain!

Glad to hear there have been so many positives for you in your 8 days of not drinking. Keep up the good work!

I know all to well the desire to drink when I had cramps; I thought wine was my savior and best friend. It wasn't until I stopped drinking that my cramps actually let up! The alcohol every month seemed to be making them a horrendous trial, and now they are almost non-existent (knock on wood it stays that way). Maybe that will happen for you as well, or at least you will find a little bit of a reprieve.

Hope you enjoyed camping and that your little one caught a catfish!
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Old 06-20-2015, 05:44 PM
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heya..... welcome.

I hope you're feeling a little better and doing well with your sobriety.

check on in when you have a chance, and keep on the path.

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