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I am sorry to say...

Old 06-16-2015, 06:26 PM
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I am sorry to say...

Most of you have been supportive, but then there is the "lunatic fringe" who want to second guess and dismiss my version of things. It makes me NUTS. I don't want to spend my energy defending my version of things to people who AREN'T THERE!!!
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Old 06-16-2015, 06:38 PM
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I read the thread. I'm sorry if you feel people are second guessing you. I think they are trying to help you more than anything. Stay strong. Sorry you're upset.

I hope things work out the way you want. 😉
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Old 06-16-2015, 06:48 PM
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I am just fine and dandy. Good night all
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Old 06-16-2015, 06:51 PM
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You can always put anyone on Ignore if you don't like what you're hearing.

I do believe that everyone is trying to offer helpful advice to you.
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Old 06-16-2015, 06:58 PM
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Hi Art...I do get what you're saying. I actually just noted over on another thread my resonance with your frustrations, as I too am going through something similar.

More and more, I've been reflecting - over a few years now - how curious it is that us alcoholics / addicts are seemingly 'not supposed to' get riled about poor service or being mucked about by various health providers. Yet, with almost all other health / medical issues, people are understanding; e.g. if someone has some serious disease like cancer, MS, requires surgery, etc etc, such a long list alas...and their treatment options becomes some additionally fraught process, then no one is particularly surprised if that patient gets upset about it. There is certainly not the same kind of underlying implication that 'well, you should be thinking better about this'.

In those scenarios, it's considered quite reasonable for that patient to complain or at the very least, to lodge their dissatisfaction through whatever formal or informal channels. And thereby to hopefully get a bit more action. So they can get the help they need, sooner rather than later. And I say this, knowing full well how convoluted and disjointed so many of our health services are - in Aus, the US, the UK etc. So I know - on that level - some of the limits of what we can achieve in terms of timely service.

But, I still believe it's inappropriate that in general, the AOD sectors still carry that subtle characterisation of their 'client / patient' base. As 'difficult', and so on and so on.

Plenty here would disagree with me, but that's how I see it, and have experienced it. It's so not helpful.
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Old 06-16-2015, 06:58 PM
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There are those people in life, ArtFriend. It used to really bother me here on this site. I had to somehow get over it, that is, if I wanted to keep getting good feedback. I learned here at SR over a few years that I will need to continue putting myself out there in order to get the good feedback - even if that means putting up with some bad feedback. And by bad, I mean "off the mark" or whatever you want to call it. And I'm sure I'm guilty of giving "off the mark" or bad feedback at some point as well
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Old 06-16-2015, 07:32 PM
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Hey Art, I just took a read on your other thread and it looked like 95% of the comments were ultra-supportive! I think the other 5% just wanted to make sure you don't completely ditch the recovery option because of the bad experience. Sure sounds like you ran into a lemon at your appointment, sorry about that.

Many of us have been there. I waited in line at 6am outside a crappy office park in the rain so I could get an assessment, and was finally seen hours later. The assessment took place in a cluttered and very small office and the counselor called me "delusional" and said I had a real problem. Nothing about this "professional assessment" matched what I had pictured in my mind, and I was so damn ticked off that I almost ran straight to the airport to fly away.

I'm glad I didn't run away, because that assessment helped me get into Inpatient Treatment where I learned some tools to get my life on the right track. We don't want you to run away either. It's super scary, and hard to go through alone. It's especially hard when we push help away for years, and when you finally ask for it....it turns into even more pain. It hurts, and I can feel your hurt also in your posts. I think we all just want you to stick with it - keep sharing, keep blowing off steam, whatever you need to do we are here to listen. Just stick with it. This was just one rough day, you are learning the ropes and you can use this experience to make your next appointment a better one
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Old 06-16-2015, 07:35 PM
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AF, I think big sombrero said it very well. Please don't let yourself get derailed. We care!
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Old 06-16-2015, 07:38 PM
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I know you're upset AF and I'm sorry.

I agree with BigS's assessment tho

it looked like 95% of the comments were ultra-supportive! I think the other 5% just wanted to make sure you don't completely ditch the recovery option because of the bad experience.
Everyone wants to see you do well AF - I promise

D
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Old 06-16-2015, 07:41 PM
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Artfriend, I know you have an issue with someone else's post but I saw a bit differently. What I took away from DD's post was that this process is about Artfriend and getting you better. It was a bad experience and I'd be upset too. BUT, Its time to become a little selfish and get the help you want and need. What happened is to you is not right, but I wouldn't lose a minutes sleep over it. Instead I would already be channeling my energy forward and thinking ahead about finding another facility that WILL be on time and WANTS to help you. Its just my opinion.
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Old 06-16-2015, 09:53 PM
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Originally Posted by ArtFriend View Post
Most of you have been supportive, but then there is the "lunatic fringe" who want to second guess and dismiss my version of things. It makes me NUTS. I don't want to spend my energy defending my version of things to people who AREN'T THERE!!!
Just ignore those people! Don't waste your time with people who don't support you. Hang in there. I'm praying for you!!!
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Old 06-16-2015, 09:56 PM
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Originally Posted by bemyself View Post

More and more, I've been reflecting - over a few years now - how curious it is that us alcoholics / addicts are seemingly 'not supposed to' get riled about poor service or being mucked about by various health providers. Yet, with almost all other health / medical issues, people are understanding; e.g. if someone has some serious disease like cancer, MS, requires surgery, etc etc, such a long list alas...and their treatment options becomes some additionally fraught process, then no one is particularly surprised if that patient gets upset about it. There is certainly not the same kind of underlying implication that 'well, you should be thinking better about this'.

In those scenarios, it's considered quite reasonable for that patient to complain or at the very least, to lodge their dissatisfaction through whatever formal or informal channels. And thereby to hopefully get a bit more action. So they can get the help they need, sooner rather than later. And I say this, knowing full well how convoluted and disjointed so many of our health services are - in Aus, the US, the UK etc. So I know - on that level - some of the limits of what we can achieve in terms of timely service.

But, I still believe it's inappropriate that in general, the AOD sectors still carry that subtle characterisation of their 'client / patient' base. As 'difficult', and so on and so on.

Plenty here would disagree with me, but that's how I see it, and have experienced it. It's so not helpful.
Speaking specifically of SR, I don't think there's a message of don't get riled Vic - more one of don't get so riled that it drives you back to drink?

There are good healthy positive ways to deal with those kind of white hot emotions. Exercise works pretty well for me when nothing else does.

D
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Old 06-17-2015, 05:56 AM
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Good morning peeps. Sorry I got so upset last night. I am dealing with some additional stuff that doesn't involve what happened yesterday. But it all got wound up in a neat little angry ball last. night.

Thanks again for the support and kind words.

We are flooding down in Texas AGAIN! Thanks to Mr. Bill the tropical depression.

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Old 06-17-2015, 06:33 AM
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Glad you're in better spirits this morning ArtFriend.
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Old 06-17-2015, 06:45 AM
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Happy to see you here, AF. Hang in there! xo
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Old 06-17-2015, 07:45 AM
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Great to see you here! I hope you have a good day. Do something nice for yourself today. You deserve it. :-)
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Old 06-17-2015, 09:08 AM
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Glad to see you AF!!!
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Old 06-17-2015, 09:26 AM
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Hey Art, everyone want's everyone to succeed, that I have no doubt about!!
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Old 06-17-2015, 09:51 AM
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One thing I have discovered in sobriety is that it is a lot more fun to have resentments about people places and things than it is to work on the numerous problems in my life.

Hell hath no fury like an alcoholic with a legitimate gripe.

No one ever. Said the world is just or fair so I accept that and control how I react to it
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Old 06-17-2015, 11:12 AM
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I dont know wnat happened but im glad your here AF
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