venuscat

Love ~ we can go over and over the reasons why.
In my mind, the only important thing is getting back on track.
Making the decision all over again to follow the path that we truly want to take.

Yes, you know I have been here; it is a scary place. The damage is done, and it's hard to turn back. But it's not about turning back. It's about moving forward into a better understanding of ourselves.

I know it's hard to think two years was about to be...but the truth is, this is the rest of our lives, one day at a time. That's all any of us have my darling....and you can have that again too.

We all believe in you.

And I love you very much.

V xx ♥

Gilmer

I'm sorry, Snooz.

I wholeheartedly agree with all the encouragement everyone here has given you.

My recommendation: stick like glue to SR. Lean on it--put your whole weight upon it!

And don't hesitate to get f2f support if you need it, too!

48heath

Snoozy,sorry to hear this.

Start again,don't beat yourself up about it.

You know where I am if I can be helpful.

doggonecarl

Hard to say. Milestones, which in your case would have been two years, are often difficult. Do we alcoholics/addicts fear success so much? I don't know.

You say you had this. Over confidence can often be a bane. But I don't know if your relapse was due to that.

All my relapses were choices. Insane ones, but choices none the less. The stance of not drinking/using, of recovery, which was so strong, is suddenly supplanted by the idea of drinking, in a flash. The idea of drinking becomes attractive, turns to action. And if it needed a nudge, I would justify it, somehow.

The solution is to get back to sobriety, humbled by the relapse, but strengthened by the years of recovery that lay before it.

NJKitty

Sorry about your slip Snoozy. I am proud of you for getting right back to it. We are never safe from this disease. Maybe you can journal what led up to the slip. Then file it away and only pull it out when you need it. You have 2 years of success to focus on. Don't let this short time of bad judgment cloud all that you accomplished.

least

I started drinking again after being sober for 20 yrs. It took me almost two years to get sober again. I hope it doesn't take you that long to get back to being sober.

bigsombrero

Sorry to hear it. We have your back. And the good news is that your tone demonstrates that you are dead set against it happening again!

When you drank, that part of you that keeps saying "why not?", finally got what it wanted. It won. All of us in sobriety fight that voice frequently, and when that voice gets loud and obnoxious, we often get tired of fighting and just give in. That's why sobriety isn't a cake walk! In my case, I seem to have blocks of days or weeks when that voice gets louder. Ignoring that voice is one thing. Confronting that voice is another!

Maybe instead of ignoring urges, or simply letting them pass, you'd be better off confronting those urges when they get overwhelming. Make a list of why your life is better without alcohol. List your accomplishments over these past 2 years. List the problems that alcohol brings into your life. Sometimes, it helps to revisit the simple facts: sobriety is the right choice for you.

Your addiction will lie to you. Have statistics and facts at the ready to confront those lies when you are struggling!

courage2

Dear Snoozy!

The most important thing now is to stop drinking again, now, right away. When I relapsed, well, I suppose it's true for any of us -- just all the barriers I'd carefully erected against cravings, all the sober habits and thoughts I'd tried to learn -- **Crash!*** I was floundering and it was like the only thing I remembered was how to drink.

Force yourself to do the things you did when you were new to recovery, and learn from them again -- they still work.

And add something. Now is the time to do something you said you'd never do to help yourself. If you said you'd never do IOP, sign up. If you said you'd never do AA, go. Whatever -- give your recovery some new support. Call in all the troops plus the reserves!

You're not bad. You are still 100% our beloved SnoozyQ. You're just drinking, and you need to stop, and you know it. We're here.

Verte

Hugs and support for you Snoozy.

Hopeless1978

Hi Snoozy! First off, **HUGS**!!
You went almost 2 years. Do you know how many people WISH they could say that? You made a mistake. It's not the end of the world. You should be proud of yourself for making it that long!! We all can get weak and mess up! Start over! One day at a time, babes!! You got this!!
I wish you nothing but the best!! It's a mistake. It's not the end of the world, hun!!

MidnightBlue

((Snoozy))

My friend, sorry to hear that.

I understand - it hurts a lot to lose a battle. But it's just ONE battle in 2 years. Every great fighter has at least one lost battle under the belt.

Analyze why this happened, learned your lesson. Take a deep breath. Move on. Never look back again.

Chin up.

Aellyce

Snoozy, I am sorry about your relapse and pain. Others have already said it all: you do know how to live well sober, nothing is lost from all that hard work.

From what I gather here based on posts by people who had relapses after significant amount of sober time, it seems that often getting and staying sober again requires introducing some new recovery tools... If you feel this is necessary, please try some new things again, like courage suggested.

You had the strength to come back here now, I think you also do to try again! You are loved and respected by your fellow travelers here.

Soberwolf

Snoozy i think your awesome

PurpleKnight

Never give up Snoozy!! You can do this!!

Soberpotamus

Aww, sorry to hear it, Snoozy. But it's important to not let it stop you from getting back on the horse. Two years is great You don't have to let this be bigger than what it is. Just a blip. You got this

Ruby2

Hi Snoozy and thank you for posting. I'm sorry that you drank. I'm just over 18 months and was freaking out last week about how I'm going to make it to two years. The best I could come up with was "one day at a time. Just for today, I'm not going to drink." I don't have this. It's not in the bag. Every day is a reprieve and I can't afford to forget that. It stinks, really. I don't want to obsess about alcohol every day but each day I can't forget I am an alcoholic. I'm hoping it gets better.

Hugs.

DuhDave

Feeling your pain Snoozy. NOW...Let go of it and let's get those sobriety muscle's pumped back up.

Tell that AV of your's it's had it's laff and it's over ! It's back on the wagon !

You Can do this !...You have proved this to your self everyday for the past 2+ years !

Rootin' for YOU !

DD

biminiblue

Please don't beat yourself up - of that part I am certain.

I didn't drink for 18 years, and then I did. It just is.

I'm back now with 15 months sober. Going back to regular drinking will bring nothing but misery. It may not be today or tomorrow - I was able to moderate for about two years - but it did get me in the end. No good comes in the bottle. None. I don't want to ever go back to that depression, paranoia, delusion, fear, self-loathing, 3AM terror. Get out now, lovely.

Hevyn

Dear Snoozy, you are loved by your SR family & we know you will triumph over this.

I had 3 yrs. sober once - thought I could have a few & picked up again without even giving it much thought. Obviously I needed further proof that I can't touch it. 7 years later (I wish I was kidding) I found SR and got my life back. You're doing a great thing by owning this right after it happened, & not letting it turn into something worse.

Thepatman

Freakin AV sits the corner and waits for the strike. Hypocrite and cunning.

Please get back on the right path. You are a pilar on SR. The AV can shake our foundation, but never bring us down. We are many, routing for you.