Silly AV is starting to coo at me...help!!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ontario
Posts: 40
Silly AV is starting to coo at me...help!!!
You know who I'm talking about... The little (big) Addiction Voice who says "you'll quit tomorrow" or "You can have just one" and causes a relapse every time... How on earth do you cope?! I want to go just one day...... But I'm already panicking... Help!!!
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by usedtobepretty 
The little (big) Addiction Voice who says "you'll quit tomorrow" or "You can have just one" and causes a relapse every time...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
Try to remember that your AV is a huge liar - full of empty promises.
Distract yourself; read a book; go for a walk, take a warm bath; go out for ice cream. Just don't drink.
Rooting for you.
Distract yourself; read a book; go for a walk, take a warm bath; go out for ice cream. Just don't drink.
Rooting for you.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Like Carl says, it's nothing more than a voice, a thought. It has no power of itself because all of that resides within you. That power becomes available to you when you finally make that careful and considered commitment to never drink again. You can be free of this for good.
Look up Rational Recovery or AVRT. They are all about this, and you will probably look at your AV in a different way once you read that stuff. I know I did.
You are recognizing your AV for what it is, and that is an excellent starting point. Believe that you can quit if you only choose to, and that you deserve it. Then do it! And once you have done it, what else can you achieve? Onward!
The Secular Connections forum has a lot of resources there for you in this direction. You will be most welcome there.
Look up Rational Recovery or AVRT. They are all about this, and you will probably look at your AV in a different way once you read that stuff. I know I did.
You are recognizing your AV for what it is, and that is an excellent starting point. Believe that you can quit if you only choose to, and that you deserve it. Then do it! And once you have done it, what else can you achieve? Onward!
The Secular Connections forum has a lot of resources there for you in this direction. You will be most welcome there.
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
It's just an urge and doesn't mean you have to actually have that first drink. What is that one drink going to possibly lead to? What is it that made you decide to stop in the first place? Sometimes thinking thru that one drink to the many more that would probably follow and all the bad consequences that could lead to helps me during moments like this.
Post in here every minute or even more than that if necessary until the urge subsides. Keep remembering you don't have to take that first drink no matter what.
You did the right thing coming in here immediately and asking for help. You're on the right path! Keep on it!
Post in here every minute or even more than that if necessary until the urge subsides. Keep remembering you don't have to take that first drink no matter what.
You did the right thing coming in here immediately and asking for help. You're on the right path! Keep on it!
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
it will get easier you heard of urge surfing ?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 5,785
I would make myself list why I wanted to be sober when these cravings popped up. I would also call the AV out. Just one drink, was never just one drink. Also, I came to realize if I kept promising that I would get sober "tomorrow", I was never going to get sober.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Drive you mad don't they! Just like a kid who's after something. First trying to get round you, then sulking, then getting angry and hard done by. Just tell it. "Not today. Go play somewhere else." Praying / meditating sometimes helps. (Just saying "God - please help me by removing my desire for that drink" - nothing to lose by trying it!)
Going to a meeting or talking to an AA friend helps me.
Making a gratitude list helps me
Or planning something wonderful - even if it's unlikely you're going to get to do it - mentally landscaping gardens helps me sometimes - weird because I hate gardening. Or planning a perfect party / holiday / how to redecorate a room. I have to really focus on the details for it to work. (Hope that doesn't sound silly)
Reading helps me (I believe that was my earliest form of escapism!)
It won't make the voice go quiet - just give you some positive thoughts so you're better placed to shush it than you are likely to listen to any of its lies.
Keep going - you can do this.
Going to a meeting or talking to an AA friend helps me.
Making a gratitude list helps me
Or planning something wonderful - even if it's unlikely you're going to get to do it - mentally landscaping gardens helps me sometimes - weird because I hate gardening. Or planning a perfect party / holiday / how to redecorate a room. I have to really focus on the details for it to work. (Hope that doesn't sound silly)
Reading helps me (I believe that was my earliest form of escapism!)
It won't make the voice go quiet - just give you some positive thoughts so you're better placed to shush it than you are likely to listen to any of its lies.
Keep going - you can do this.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 341
It's So hard, especially those first couple days. In my experience, it gets a tiny bit easier once you start racking up the days because you won't want to lose that. Just keeping telling that AV No!
Stay strong and stick around here.
By the way, your username could've been mine, lol. Alcohol did nothing good for me in the long run.
Stay strong and stick around here.
By the way, your username could've been mine, lol. Alcohol did nothing good for me in the long run.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ontario
Posts: 40
I made it!
It took moving all my furniture around, to occupy myself... Inviting a friend over, walking the dog, and eating everything in sight... But I'm back on the wagon! Day one is under my belt... Now On to day two..
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Canada
Posts: 167
Congratulations you did it!
I used to distract myself with all kinds of busy work. That's ok it will get easier and life will get better. As it did for me.
I kept a picture in my mind of how awful I felt at the end of my drinking. How I felt, sounded, looked like and smelt. That helps me.
Keep posting!
Maggie
I used to distract myself with all kinds of busy work. That's ok it will get easier and life will get better. As it did for me.
I kept a picture in my mind of how awful I felt at the end of my drinking. How I felt, sounded, looked like and smelt. That helps me.
Keep posting!
Maggie
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Originally Posted by usedtobepretty
It took moving all my furniture around, to occupy myself... Inviting a friend over, walking the dog, and eating everything in sight... But I'm back on the wagon! Day one is under my belt... Now On to day two..
Well done on getting to day 2!! Consider any and all support you believe will help. I had to find that to stack some time by getting outside of my comfort zone.
Keep posting!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
I can't even remember the last time I could have just one, and be satisfied with that. Everything that little voice says is a complete and utter lie. Make sure you cover HALT like Patman says.. Are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired? Treat yourself to a good meal, ice cream afterwards for the cravings.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: FLAAADAH
Posts: 793
You know you cant have "just one". "It" knows you cant have "just one".
In the early days "Action and distraction" worked for me. Keep your hands and your mind occupied as best you can and the "Crave" will start fading.
Do this enough times and "It" will give up...and not bother you as much.
The more you tell it NO...and MEAN IT, the easier it gets!
Have you ever seen one of the "Chuckie the Doll" movies? Thats what I picture my AV as. "Chuckie"!
You Can do this !
DD
In the early days "Action and distraction" worked for me. Keep your hands and your mind occupied as best you can and the "Crave" will start fading.
Do this enough times and "It" will give up...and not bother you as much.
The more you tell it NO...and MEAN IT, the easier it gets!
Have you ever seen one of the "Chuckie the Doll" movies? Thats what I picture my AV as. "Chuckie"!
You Can do this !
DD
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
yep... I know the one. 531 days later, it's still there.
not all the time, not as powerfully, not as cleverly....
but it raises up and tries to mess with my head frequently.
nowadays, I just observe it. I post here about it. I call it out for what it is.
one thing I like to reflect back on is that I have 25 years of experience showing me that alcohol didn't work in my favor. I have 531 days of experience that show me my life is richer, deeper, happier, more meaningful without alcohol.
no matter what that voice tries to tell me - my OWN EXPERIENCE can speak much more loudly if I simply remember to pause and let it.
not all the time, not as powerfully, not as cleverly....
but it raises up and tries to mess with my head frequently.
nowadays, I just observe it. I post here about it. I call it out for what it is.
one thing I like to reflect back on is that I have 25 years of experience showing me that alcohol didn't work in my favor. I have 531 days of experience that show me my life is richer, deeper, happier, more meaningful without alcohol.
no matter what that voice tries to tell me - my OWN EXPERIENCE can speak much more loudly if I simply remember to pause and let it.
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