Hello
 

I came here hoping to be able to talk and get some clarity in my life. After living with an alcoholic for 10 years, I left last year and came back, I am again at the point of leaving again. He admits he is an alcoholic, but says everyone drinks except me. I drink occasionally more social than anything. I guess I am feeling overwhelmed and need to be able to talk.
Thanks

Hi and Welcome,

I'm sorry for your situation. If your husband admits he is an alcoholic, is he ready to stop drinking? If not, there is not much you can do. You might also check out the Friends & Families forum on this board.

No he will not stop drinking, because as he puts it this is him and he wont become a monk

Hate to say this - but you can't get him sober. He's got to want it.

Out of interest, why did you come back after getting out that first time?

Honestly I came back because of the grown children ( two are his and one is mine) he is 10 years older and the oldest child has three children who call me grandma, when I left I wasn't allowed to see them. The kids kept telling me how much he loved me and that he has changed. He did for awhile but, it is back to the same old thing again. I know stupid reason for coming back, I really wish now I had stayed away

Not letting you see the grandkids is a dirty trick. :( As has been said, you can't make him get sober. The only thing you can do is get support for yourself. :hug:

thank you so much

Hi F150Lady, and welcome to SR. :)

I unfortunately don't have any advice, but welcome to SR nonetheless. As has been pointed out, maybe check out the Friends & Family forum, as there's many wives / GFs in your shoes.

Thank you Troy

Welcome to SR

Great input here already. Alcoholism doesn't make him a bad person. But his actions under the influence can you you pain. Protect your sanity at all costs.

Be kind to yourself

I'm so sorry for the pain you're going through F150lady. I hope it helps to be here, where people truly understand. Good to have you with us.

Welcome to SR

Welcome to the Forum!! :wave:

Something someone said today reminded me of your post. They said "You can no more get someone sober, than you can learn to ride a bike for them. And if they don't want to do it, it ain't gonna happen."

I agree that it was a mean trick using the grand children to force you back. I'm suspecting that they want a live in Dad-sitter to try and keep him out of mischief.

What you do can only be your decision. But you only have one life. You have no responsibility for this man. He is responsible for himself, and only he can turn things around.

You deserve to be happy, joyous and free (as does everyone). I hope you do what you need to so that you can be those things. x