Right Now
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 6
It seem to have worked. So I am not very good at maintaining effort for any stretch of time. I am deciding to start here with not using. I am craving about every other second. My boyfriend has asked me twice if I want him to get for me in the last hour. I have resisted but I am so week. I spend 90percent of my days sitting in a vacant room in my house, with the door shut. Completely isolated and sedintary. Everyone in my home uses. I have no friends and no acquantances. I dont want to just waste my life deteriorating. I want to function and start being productive and be free of this binding , confining addiction. I. feel governed by the drug, my shame, guilt
and resentment. I am hoping to get whatever it is I need to just make it through these intense cravings. Something other than 3packs of cigarettes and tjrowing a fit, I no I am in a sorry state at this time and anyone who wants to comment in that regard is not going to make me any worse. Hopefully I can find support. I will be checking in often . Comments are hoped for. thanks
and resentment. I am hoping to get whatever it is I need to just make it through these intense cravings. Something other than 3packs of cigarettes and tjrowing a fit, I no I am in a sorry state at this time and anyone who wants to comment in that regard is not going to make me any worse. Hopefully I can find support. I will be checking in often . Comments are hoped for. thanks
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
After a lot of years in recovery, in my experience and observations we have a tendency to sabotage our well being by continuing to do unhealthy things to our self. Resentments AND isolation are a couple examples. I needed to be around sober people and I’m grateful I joined AA at an early period a lot of years ago. Like here they are a bunch of people who understand our good and bad moments and help us in many ways as opposed to doing things by ourself. I got positive feelings by going to many meetings instead of staying alone with my worst enemy, ME and my thinking processing.
It’s work and takes time but so worth it! I’m grateful to be able to say it’s good to be comfortable in my own skin, most of the time.
BE WELL
After a lot of years in recovery, in my experience and observations we have a tendency to sabotage our well being by continuing to do unhealthy things to our self. Resentments AND isolation are a couple examples. I needed to be around sober people and I’m grateful I joined AA at an early period a lot of years ago. Like here they are a bunch of people who understand our good and bad moments and help us in many ways as opposed to doing things by ourself. I got positive feelings by going to many meetings instead of staying alone with my worst enemy, ME and my thinking processing.
It’s work and takes time but so worth it! I’m grateful to be able to say it’s good to be comfortable in my own skin, most of the time.
BE WELL
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 6
thank you for the replies. I am awake and ready to try to resist another day. Im hoping my craving will be less today.I had a bacon an egg sandwhich for breakfast. I want to go back to bed but I know I wont sleep. So Im checking in . It hasnt been 24 hours yet but. Im getting closer. Today is my husbands birthday R.I.P. I miss him and love him . This is a great thing to do for his birthday. Get clean
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,554
Hello jacqhp - it's so good that you joined us. We're all in this together, and we understand.
I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling over the loss of your husband. I agree - a great tribute to him would be to get your life back. I finally realized that getting numb only made the pain & anxiety worse in the long run. Glad to have you with us.
I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling over the loss of your husband. I agree - a great tribute to him would be to get your life back. I finally realized that getting numb only made the pain & anxiety worse in the long run. Glad to have you with us.
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