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ArtFriend 06-04-2015 05:27 AM

Trying to be healthy in an unhealthy world
 
Seems almost impossible. We live in this consumerism world where we are told by marketers that we just are not good enough, healthy enough, smart enough, etc. But! Wait... they have a "cure" for all that! Bad back? Get a new bed! Crappy car? Get a new one at low low discount prices! Tired all the time? Get a pill with a butterfly that will put you to sleep! You "need" a new house! You "need" a better dishwasher! Can't get it up? There is a blue pill for that.

The constant message is that we are lacking and need "something" to make us whole. As long as we feel "less-than" we will seek out external ways to fill the void. I have done this with alcohol. It's funny, but the hole in my soul does get filled with booze, but then it leaks out again, leaving a bigger hole.

How can one be healthy is all ways, when the world is constantly eroding your soul?

zjw 06-04-2015 05:33 AM

love your post! quit paying attention tot he world. You wanna feel fat? read some magazine like cosmo. You wanna feel poor? drive through a wealthy neighborhood etc.. Just because someones wealthy monetarily doesnt mean your any less. Or someones pretty on the outside doesnt mean your somehow ugly on the outside etc..

Its insanity out there the insane are running the asylum.

March to the beat of your own drum.

But your post really does say a lot about our society and how we are almost conditioned to feel inadequate in some way shape or form.

ArtFriend 06-04-2015 05:39 AM

We have lost the distinction between "needs" and "wants" thanks to the media and marketers.

aasharon90 06-04-2015 05:45 AM

Soooo many freakin commercials. :) We
cant even watch regular tv without seeing
more commercials than the tv show itself. :(

I guess that's why I tape what I want to
watch and watch it the next day fast forwarding
thru all those aggravating commercials. :)

I understand that advertisement is a way
to promote what folks want to sell. However,
when it comes to alcohol commercials or
advertisements on the radio or read them
in the news, for me, I have to hold fast that
one glass of wine even tho they may say its
okay to have every once in awhile is not
gonna be good for me. EVER.

If they say that whatever is in the wine
is good for my heart or body, I still wont
believe it for me. Wine is still poison, still
toxic, still will NEVER make my life, my
body, mine or soul better. EVER.

I don't care how many statics say a little
wine is okay to have, I know for me it
aint gonna work. For me.

As for all the other freakin annoying
commercials, sure we check the appliances
out and this and that, but we always go
back to the basic, simple, little to no extra
bells and whistles.

Im a 1958 baby and grew up with far
less options that are availbale to us today.
And at 56 yrs now with a husband 11 yrs
older than I, im in good hands because
he is from the old school so to speak and
he is familiar to all those simplicities in
life both of us grew up with back in the day
can still work for us today. :)

Keeping It Simple. :)

tomsteve 06-04-2015 05:48 AM

How can one be healthy is all ways, when the world is constantly eroding your soul?

It's very simple,art:
Don't allow the world to control you.
I don't watch the news. Don't watch paid programming. Don't listen to all the crap ya mention for one simple reason:
I see how it effects people that do and it doesnt look peaceful, serene, or fun.
You STILL have choices today, art: let everyone and everything control you or take control.


p.S.
What sharon said,too.

ArtFriend 06-04-2015 05:52 AM

Yeah, but Tomsteve, you live in beautiful northern Michigan (Traverse City?) where I used to have a cabin to escape to (Higgins Lake). I am trapped in ultra-consumer oriented Dallas where there is a mall on every corner.

Aellyce 06-04-2015 05:59 AM

Have you thought about moving somewhere else that you like or are curious about, AF? Not saying it would resolve your inner turmoil in any stable way, but it might reset your focus a little.
Environment affects out mental health in profound ways.

Joe Nerv 06-04-2015 06:00 AM

What you state is absolutely true. The great news is that more and more people each day are becoming aware of it.

Originally Posted by ArtFriend (Post 5405642)
How can one be healthy is all ways, when the world is constantly eroding your soul?

By not buying into it. We have choices.

We can get angry, and act off of that, or we can decide to take care of ourselves and practice acting out of love. We can nurture our bodies and souls, turn away from the negative messages, and help empower others.

I just started classes at The Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN) and that's pretty much what the whole program is about. Learning to be healthy in all ways.

There is lots of hope in this area. It looks a bit bleak right now as many aren't aware, but we are. And I, for one, am embracing that.

Wholesome 06-04-2015 06:08 AM

A little off topic maybe but what gets to me is that schools and doctors keep saying that all these kids have ADHD and giving them Ritalin. It's this blanket diagnosis for any kid who doesn't conform or fit into their little pigeon holes. If a kid can't sit still or learns differently or questions too much or has legitimate behaviour issues that need to be addressed they are simple prescribed Ritalin..... a powerful stimulant. I know soooooooo many kids who are on it! How can an entire generation of kids need drugs?

Nonsensical 06-04-2015 06:09 AM


Originally Posted by tomsteve (Post 5405684)
It's very simple,art:
Don't allow the world to control you.

Indeed. I choose not to be a victim.

It matters not how strait the gate
How charged with punishment the scroll
I am the master of my fate
I am the captain of my soul

TennantSmith 06-04-2015 06:11 AM

For me, I've learned to ignore it once I lost all I had found comfort in: The nice car, steady paycheck, relationship, healthy kids. When all that went down the tank, I was forced to look inward. I learned really really quickly what was a need and what was a want.

I was on that hamster wheel for too damn long. I was thin and fit; I wanted to be thinner and fitter. I overtrained and hurt myself badly. I wanted to always have money; I worked so many hours, I never saw my kids. I wanted to have lots of friends; I was in the bar way too often and never made real friendships.

Society no longer determines my level of worth: I do. I determine what leads to me being healthy. What leads me to being the person I need to be. And the upside is that there is real joy in shunning all of the pressure and getting to know your authentic self away from all of the messages.

I always said I wanted it all. I no longer do. My shoulders are not big enough to carry it all. I just want to have enough. And that's different for everyone.

Honestly, it's a race no one can win. They keep moving the finishing line. So I decided to take the back way and I promise, the scenery is a lot more beautiful.

Jupiters 06-04-2015 06:16 AM


Originally Posted by TennantSmith (Post 5405720)
Honestly, it's a race no one can win. They keep moving the finishing line. So I decided to take the back way and I promise, the scenery is a lot more beautiful.

I like this.

ArtFriend 06-04-2015 06:18 AM


Originally Posted by haennie (Post 5405702)
Have you thought about moving somewhere else that you like or are curious about, AF? Not saying it would resolve your inner turmoil in any stable way, but it might reset your focus a little.
Environment affects out mental health in profound ways.

Yes, it does! I visited New Zealand a few years back and I was immediately struck by it's beauty, but also the people. So very nice. The whole "vibe" was different. I had thought maybe someday I might move there. TV had about 1/4 the ads we have here.


Either there or Toledo (kidding)

ScottFromWI 06-04-2015 06:30 AM

Live life on your own terms. Marketing is only effective if you listen to it. Hype only matters if you buy into it. You only see media if you turn it on.

At the end of the day, you get to make choices about what you eat, what you buy, where you go, what you do and who you do it with. Don't let other people make those decisions for you.

Aellyce 06-04-2015 06:58 AM


Originally Posted by ArtFriend (Post 5405731)
Yes, it does! I visited New Zealand a few years back and I was immediately struck by it's beauty, but also the people. So very nice. The whole "vibe" was different. I had thought maybe someday I might move there. TV had about 1/4 the ads we have here.


Either there or Toledo (kidding)

Seriously, why not? If I'm not wrong, you are single and self-employed -- could not be more ideal to go wherever you want. I've done it many times and it's always both exciting and challenging to be in a new environment. What I am saying about the effect of the environment is coming not only from science but also from my own life, I experienced it both in positive and negative ways. I find that even the planning phase of a move is exciting and usually really takes my mind off my misery and the existential angst I'm so prone to for a while at least, because simply the change and trying to adapt to it gives me meaning and purpose. Not even speaking of seeing the world...

I hear ya on being annoyed by the consumerism. I rarely watch TV, there were periods in my life when I did not even own one for years. Never missed it. I also kinda stay out of the materialism quite a bit, were never interested in accumulating surplus, property, etc. Highly utility-oriented with both that and money: I am interested in these things as far as they serve the other things that drive me much more, so that I can focus on these other things because I don't need to worry about basic needs and security. But that's about it. I definitely think it's a choice we can make, we can choose not to be tied to and overly affected by those parts of our culture that you speak of. I mentioned Maslow's pyramid a few times here on SR, because it describes it so well for me. I need to have that top level of it (be in it), otherwise I feel profoundly dissatisfied with life... can actually much more easily not have some of the "lower" needs fulfilled, but I'm miserably not myself without self-actualization. Of course it means different things for everyone. If I can't experience that, it's like not only there is a void, but I'm prone to nihilism and going to very dark places mentally. Not suggesting this applies to you, am just trying to say it truly is a choice we can make. Of course it's often not easy because our demons stand in the way -- why so important to deal with them in a constructive way.

ArtFriend 06-04-2015 07:17 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

ArtFriend 06-04-2015 07:24 AM

I think the ideal is to achieve self-actualization, but that is rarefied space. I think most people are in the two psychological needs areas.

I have moving in the back of my mind... it has been with me for years. I resisted doing it because of my mother, but now that she is gone, it has become more of a reality for me. I need to address my addiction issues before I wander off around the world tho.

Aellyce 06-04-2015 08:25 AM

I agree with you. For me, it's a creative process that always remains open-ended rather than something that is achieved in any steady form, the ending is only death really. No one really knows what their potential is, or what potential life and the world has for us. But one can maybe say that by being in the process of trying to find out and not conforming to external standards, we are becoming it. For me, self-actualization is more a mental state than physical reality, although it does require physical actions to realize the inspirations externally.

Your mother was a lucky person to have you by her side in the last phase of her life. Yes I think it's best to get to at least a relatively secure stage with sobriety before big changes, although I think some people here would say otherwise. I moved twice while I was drinking alcoholically, the first was across continents and I put myself into an environment with it that was seriously incompatible with me in a few ways. I don't blame it on the environment now, but it's a fact that my drinking had steep escalation after that move, I was just extremely unhappy during those years and tried to compensate it with alcohol and with an addictive relationship with another alcoholic and nihilist. Then I moved to a place that I love, and it did not resolve or help my drinking at all. I generally felt happier and were much more productive, but the alcoholism did not go away and eventually got worse. Some people recommend environmental change to help resolve addictions, and it makes sense in some ways, but I don't think it can really solve it for someone who is already in deep. It also generates stress, which is a major trigger for most of us.

I did not mean to divert your original topic, AF... just had these thoughts in response to it. My experience is that when I'm in an environment or culture that does not suit me, I tend to project my frustrations into everything external, including other people, and feel that these things are responsible for my turmoil. And when I'm someplace that I like and feel connected with, it does not even occur to me to think that way even during times of high stress or depression. So in a way, it's not purely projection, those things do affect us and while we can choose our actions and set boundaries, it's not a conscious choice how we feel about whatever. Your feelings and concerns do have basis and value, it's how we react to it that is a matter of choice. Anyhow, I'm rambling so will stop here :)

Venecia 06-04-2015 08:28 AM


Originally Posted by Nonsensical (Post 5405716)
Indeed. I choose not to be a victim.

It matters not how strait the gate
How charged with punishment the scroll
I am the master of my fate
I am the captain of my soul

^^^^ That.

If I chose it to allow it, the external world could give me enough rationale to remain drunk until booze killed me. Environmental degradation. Greed jeopardizing existence of animals and trafficking in humans. Death cults and rape cults premising their ideologies on fanaticism. A seemingly intractable racial divide. In many ways, we live in a horrific world, though the whims of the genetic lottery give us so much that is beyond the reach of a substantial portion of people with whom we share this planet.

I choose to be concerned about my external world and try to do things that, in my own small way, make a difference. There is also profound beauty to be seen and embraced. I can neither drink away Boko Haram or ISIL or any number of things that imperil the external world, any more than I could drink away that which challenged my internal world. I choose to control my internal world through sobriety. It helps.

MIRecovery 06-04-2015 09:45 AM

Happiness is an inside job. What keeps me content can't be bought. My Grand children, my wife, helping others, watching my flowers transform my yard into a mini paradise, a beautiful day, my connection with God.

Do I wish I could replace my 11 year old car? Sure I do but it gets me where I'm going so who cares. I'm blessed in all the ways that count.

The only thing I wish for is my daughter back but that is not to be so I have to deal with the loss


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