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Since I can't be a big boy,

Old 05-25-2015, 03:52 AM
  # 41 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
she said, "take a nap".
You may want to take the hint. That means she knows full well what you're doing, and doesn't feel like dealing with it. I'm not sure if she's going to be very impressed if you just show up at her hotel mid way through her trip, hammered out of your mind. May want to rethink that one.
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Old 05-25-2015, 04:41 AM
  # 42 (permalink)  
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I hope you don't choose to do this but instead get to detox.

You really are at risk of pushing your wife too far and losing your support
system and the stability you have.

It isn't worth it.
We've been where you are and it really does hurt.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:02 AM
  # 43 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Beccybean View Post
You love her to death? Is this a great way to show it? Turning up in a state and expecting her to sort you out. Do you think maybe she deserves more than that?

If you love her as much as you say, maybe you could show her that you're willing to put the work in to get clean and sober by checking into rehab. That way you could start be to support her as much as she supports you.
She deserves better than what I am giving her at the moment. I'm a work in progress.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:09 AM
  # 44 (permalink)  
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Start now by getting sober.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:10 AM
  # 45 (permalink)  
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You are good with the rationalizations. But they won't serve you well in the end.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:10 AM
  # 46 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
She deserves better than what I am giving her at the moment. I'm a work in progress.
So give her something better. Dump the booze and sober up. This entire mess started with a bad choice on your behalf. Make a good choice today.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:16 AM
  # 47 (permalink)  
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We are all a work in progress....but you have to work to make progress.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:18 AM
  # 48 (permalink)  
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There is no booze today. I have to work tomorrow. I think I know why I am the way that I am. I will post this once and only once and I don't want to get into any war stories, but I went through alot of "stuff" when I was younger. Everything from my father punching me in the face, dealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs, organized crime, life support, flying airplanes high on cocaine, been on TV, did commercials for health and fitness companies, was sponsored by LifeTime Fitness, hung out Brahm Acradi (who founded LifeTime fitness), I've been in the same hotel that the movie Goodfellas was filmed in, my father built casinos all over the world. Pretty interesting stuff, it was all wrong. Somehow I survived to tell about it
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:27 AM
  # 49 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
There is no booze today. I have to work tomorrow. I think I know why I am the way that I am. I will post this once and only once and I don't want to get into any war stories, but I went through alot of "stuff" when I was younger. Everything from my father punching me in the face, dealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs, organized crime, life support, flying airplanes high on cocaine, been on TV, did commercials for health and fitness companies, was sponsored by LifeTime Fitness, hung out Brahm Acradi (who founded LifeTime fitness), I've been in the same hotel that the movie Goodfellas was filmed in, my father built casinos all over the world. Pretty interesting stuff, it was all wrong. Somehow I survived to tell about it
No booze today.....just work on that for now, I think that's a fine decision.

The past can certainly shape us, and a lot of us have some pretty horrific backgrounds. There is help for those things, but you need to be sober first....just tackle that for today.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:27 AM
  # 50 (permalink)  
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One last thing, a couple of my "buddies" robbed a brinks truck of 4 million dollars....they are still in prison. But I saw what 4 million cash looks like, and I don't blame them. its a lot of damn money.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:31 AM
  # 51 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
There is no booze today. I have to work tomorrow. I think I know why I am the way that I am. I will post this once and only once and I don't want to get into any war stories, but I went through alot of "stuff" when I was younger. Everything from my father punching me in the face, dealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs, organized crime, life support, flying airplanes high on cocaine, been on TV, did commercials for health and fitness companies, was sponsored by LifeTime Fitness, hung out Brahm Acradi (who founded LifeTime fitness), I've been in the same hotel that the movie Goodfellas was filmed in, my father built casinos all over the world. Pretty interesting stuff, it was all wrong. Somehow I survived to tell about it
So it seems that you have lived a life of privilege that most people haven't experienced. That is what makes you drink to excess? I'm finding I really hard to relate at this point. I hope you go back and read all of the posts from people who tried to help these past few days. You are the only one who can start the process. I wish you well, but can't feed I to this thread any longer. You're craving attention that you used to get. I bet if you stop drinking long enough and got back to the old you, you would get attention for the right reasons.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:35 AM
  # 52 (permalink)  
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I don't crave attention. I prefer to be anonymous.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:39 AM
  # 53 (permalink)  
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I drank destructively because I was addicted to alcohol. I wasted a lot of time contemplating why I was addicted to alcohol instead of just handling the addiction.
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Old 05-25-2015, 07:47 AM
  # 54 (permalink)  
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'I drank for joy and became miserable.

I drank to be outgoing and became self centered.

I drank to be sociable and became lonely.

I drank for friendship and made enemies.

I drank to soften sorrow and wallowed in self-pity.

I drank for sleep and awakened without rest.

I drank for strength and felt weak.

I drank for relaxation and got the shakes.

I drank for confidence and felt unsure

I drank for courage and became afraid

I drank for assurance and became doubtful

I drank to forget thoughts and had blackouts

I drank for conversation and tied my tongue

I drank to be in heaven and I came to know hell

I drank to forget and became haunted

I drank for freedom and became a slave (of alcohol)

I drank to ease problems and saw them multiply

I drank to cope with life and invited death.

I drank because I had the 'right' to and everything turned out wrong.

Said this fellow, 'It must have taken a bunch of booze to get you in this shape?

I said, 'Just one. For me one is too many and a thousand isn't enough.'

Ruby Mae Heard
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Old 05-25-2015, 08:04 AM
  # 55 (permalink)  
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I think one of my comments was removed Thomas?

Anyways, how are you today? Doing any better my friend ?
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Old 05-25-2015, 08:06 AM
  # 56 (permalink)  
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Yeah, thought you might be a landscaper. Asked in a thread couple months ago, but never got a response. I landscaped for a couple years myself. Just as a grunt labourer though, not the boss. Was the maintenance foreman during the second year though.

Tough job. 100+ hour weeks, you get home at 11:30pm and debate whether you should have a shower or eat, because you don't have time for both, as you need to be up at 6am to go back to work. Sometimes on Sunday you'd get to call it quits at 5pm, then you'd spend your evening wondering what you're supposed to do with all you free time, because you're not used to it.

Was a good time in my life though. The crew(s) you work with become your second family, because you're with each other almost every waking hour of the day.

Always loved when the new guys showed up. heh, the boss had it easy, because he didn't even have to fire anyone. If you couldn't cut it, we made sure you quit within your first week, lol. We're exhausted and pushing ourselves as is, so last thing we need is to pick up the slack from someone else.

Last edited by ScottFromWI; 05-25-2015 at 09:03 AM. Reason: Removed link to personal info
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Old 05-25-2015, 08:21 AM
  # 57 (permalink)  
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Jeff, you may want to limit the amount of personal info u share on the site as I'm sure you'd like to protect your identity. Just a friendly suggestion.

Sent from my iPad using SoberRecovery
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Old 05-25-2015, 08:36 AM
  # 58 (permalink)  
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Thomas/Jeff,
Your work is impressive. Imagine how much you can accomplish going into each new day feeling good? Take the first step today.
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Old 05-25-2015, 09:02 AM
  # 59 (permalink)  
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Some posts have been removed....please do not post or repost personal contact information or links to sites containing said info
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Old 05-25-2015, 09:11 AM
  # 60 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
There is no booze today. I have to work tomorrow. I think I know why I am the way that I am. I will post this once and only once and I don't want to get into any war stories, but I went through alot of "stuff" when I was younger. Everything from my father punching me in the face, dealing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs, organized crime, life support, flying airplanes high on cocaine, been on TV, did commercials for health and fitness companies, was sponsored by LifeTime Fitness, hung out Brahm Acradi (who founded LifeTime fitness), I've been in the same hotel that the movie Goodfellas was filmed in, my father built casinos all over the world. Pretty interesting stuff, it was all wrong. Somehow I survived to tell about it
Drug dealers wreck lives, a dealer delt my friend some cocaine cut with something nasty, he's been dead for 5 years.
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