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My tentative hello...

Old 05-18-2015, 11:20 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Welcome, Daria. Glad you joined the May thread. Each day is a challenge that is different from the one before. Your plan sounds like a good place to begin. I too have (and do) struggle with how to handle those situations where I ordinarily would have been drinking around other people. As far as my family is concerned, there isn't a single one that's saddened or let down that I'm abstaining. Friends are a little bit harder.

I agree that it's nobody else's business but I also see why we have to prepare for how to handle the inevitable questions and turning down the offer for a drink. Avoiding certain situations in the beginning days is crucial for me. I'm only day 12, but that is a victory cause each day is what we are trying to stay sober in. Not "forever" but "today."

Glad you are here with us.
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Old 05-18-2015, 11:39 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Lennox View Post
As I'm only on day 9 and you are on day 1 maybe we could help one another? 😊
Oh definitely! Am very glad to have met someone with a similar problem just starting out!
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Old 05-18-2015, 11:39 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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So basically it sounds like nobody is going to care that I'm not drinking as much as I think they're going to care. lol

Oh, and thanks to all of you for such a warm welcome!
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Old 05-18-2015, 11:43 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by DariaM View Post
So basically it sounds like nobody is going to care that I'm not drinking as much as I think they're going to care. lol Oh, and thanks to all of you for such a warm welcome!
exactly
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Old 05-18-2015, 11:45 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Oh yeah! I forgot about the excuse thing. I think your belly condition is a good one. You can said "I'm not in the mood today" but you don't have to say "I'm not drinking anymore." Sounds so permanent and then it will likely give rise to rebuttals like, "You don't have a drinking problem!" You can say it is only making you sleepy these days or whatever.

The less of a deal you make out of it in your response, the less they will have to respond to.
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Old 05-18-2015, 11:50 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Welcome to the family. I'm so thankful you came out of the shadows to join us here in the light. You'll never regret it.
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Old 05-18-2015, 12:00 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Cissy View Post
Oh yeah! I forgot about the excuse thing. I think your belly condition is a good one. You can said "I'm not in the mood today" but you don't have to say "I'm not drinking anymore." Sounds so permanent and then it will likely give rise to rebuttals like, "You don't have a drinking problem!" You can say it is only making you sleepy these days or whatever.

The less of a deal you make out of it in your response, the less they will have to respond to.
I think that's a good point. Maybe I'll try to make it sound less permanent, but just say alcohol has been bothering my stomach lately (which is true) so I'm not drinking that day... no thanks. Maybe over enough time it will be the norm that I don't drink and that will be that. I'm sure some people are going to assume I'm pregnant initially. Boy will they be disappointed. lol

I think I was just concerned with giving non-permanent responses and that bleeding into my own train of thought... leaving the door open. Because it can't be. I quit for maybe 3-4 months about 5 years ago, and then started drinking again because "Hey, I can control my drinking!" And initially I did better with sticking to only 1-2 drinks every now and then, but it escalated again with time... like it always does.
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Old 05-18-2015, 03:15 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Welcome aboard DariaM

D
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Old 05-18-2015, 03:18 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Nice to meet you
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Old 05-18-2015, 03:21 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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It's so good to meet you Daria. I was once a binge drinker too - but I didn't see the warning signs the way you have. I kept going until I drank all day - no control whatsoever. SR helped me get on my feet and stay there. I'm glad you see the need for change in your life - we're with you.
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Old 05-18-2015, 03:27 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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Welcome Daria!

I am close to five months sober. This is my second go around. I was sober for 6 months, drank very little until my big trigger event, and then lost control again for about 9 months before I quit this second time.

So, in my opinion, what is missing from your plan is what to do and who to talk to if you encounter a massive trigger.
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Old 05-18-2015, 03:40 PM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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Welcome! I'm glad you joined us. You'll find tons of support here, and useful info too.
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