How to avoid going to the liquor store
 

I just can't say no sometimes to that stupid voice that says how great it would be to have a few drinks.

I haven't been doing the drink all day and all night thing (God, that's so boring), but I still cave after a couple of days without and go to the liquor store.

It's pouring rain here in Northern Utah today, so going for a walk when the voice starts talking is not an option. I will do some yoga. I will come here to SR.

NO BOOZE TODAY! NO NO NO! My AV can shove it! :gaah

Yay! you rock lilac . Way to put your sobriety first!

You know, you've started 51 threads in the last five years on this site, and a lot of them sound just like this one.

Do you want to do whatever it takes to stop drinking?

I almost want to delete my account reading that response.

To be honest, I've never been completely sure about quitting drinking. I suppose that is the AV talking when I have hesitance about staying sober.

When I got Sober my biggest issue was going to work in the morning with good intentions to not drink and then on the drive home I'd stop at the liquor store, the cycle continued for a long time and I struggled to break it, but I knew if I could it would be the holy grail.

So I got radical on myself, I started to leave my bank cards at home in the morning, a dodgy tactic should I had an emergency, but I figured if I could break this cycle for a month or two, my own Sober muscles might make it a bit easier and I'd be on my way, so that's what I did, left the house with good intentions and no cards, came home and signed into SR, and camped out for the evening, that was the beginnings of my plan!!

You can do this Lilac!! Find something that works and make Sobriety happen!! :)

Don't leave on account of that response. Decide not to drink and then stick around. We can help! But, you must ignore the AV for sure.

I'll bet most of us on SR have had repeated failures of one kind or another at some point in all of this, but we are still going after it. I'm certainly in that group.

Don't beat yourself up for that. You deserve credit, instead, for still being here.

Give up whatever has not worked, and keep looking for new ways to do this until you find the idea or mindset or program or faith or whatever that works for you.

Thanks for your post lilac. I can relate so much.

I started trying to quit drinking in September '14 and would stay sober for 4 days and then drink or sometimes as long as 12 days and then drink, and any length in between. I was always starting over. It took me 5 months to stop relapsing. Feb. 10th was my sobriety date. I stayed sober for 87 days which is the longest I have been sober since I started drinking. I was so close to picking up my 90 day chip... but I drank again last Thursday night. And I drank every night since then. And I bought some pot.

A lot of things led up to this relapse. I am going to try again to get sober, it is just a matter of when. I sort of want to get it all out of my system. I also don't want to go back to AA still wondering if I am a real alcoholic.

A friend that I met in AA, who had 2 years sober and actually sponsored me for a short time, relapsed about 2 weeks before me. I knew she relapsed cause my sponsor told me. But now that we are both on a relapse we have been hanging out and drinking together. I am enjoying having a drinking buddy. At the end of my drinking I was always drinking alone and didn't really have friends. So to have her to drink with is so much fun for me. But it is probably a big reason why I haven't started over yet. If it weren't for her being on a relapse also, I probably would have picked up a white chip and started to try to quit again by now.

ItsJustMe - I think it is really awesome that you are still here on SR and posting even through a relapse (I prefer to call it a "lapse"). That's awesome! I always avoid SR if I am/have been drinking.

How can we be of support to you in getting back on the sober train?

Good advice. Thank you. Failure is often a necessary component of success.

I learned to put on my recovery suit
of amour each day to ward off any
and all demons, temptations, lifes
terms to remain sober for a many
one days at a time.

Failure surely would have followed
me if I hadn't suited up and showed
up with willingness, openmindedness
and honest not all in that order to stay
sober each day.

I didn't give up, even if I had thoughts to,
but hung on by fingertips, crawling, taking
baby steps, following, and staying close
to many in a program of recovery that
has kept me sober this long.

Find the winners as was often spoken
my way and stick to them as they guide
the way for many to follow learning to
not drink, not use, become healthy, happy
for yrs to come.

biminiblue - really judgemental post from you, very similar to a pm you sent to me a few weeks ago....maybe you should think about the way you talk to people who've come here for help.

MarathonMan - thanks!

I get a good laugh out of the quote in your signature about the cat only drinking water! Good food for thought. I also like nonsensical's quote in your signature. I think that part of my plan will be to make 2 lists (I love lists): one of the 5 best things that can happen if I don't drink and one list of the 5 worst things that can happen if I don't drink. Review it daily. Hourly, even.

I have a sticky on my computer that lists the things I value. I review it every time I sit down at my desk. It helps reinforce healthy habits. It gets my butt out the door for a run, which I am just getting back into in the past month or so after several months of laziness and weight gain. Similar lists could keep me motivated to stay away from booze.

Lets keep the personal remarks to PM guys. Thanks
Dee
Moderator
SR
__________________________________________________ ___________________

Lilac have you checked out this thread?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

Use all the support you have, I just used SR but I sat here and got support until the urge passed...later on I found out about urge surfing - it's in the link above :)

Though I don't fault you for relapsing, I wasn't offended by the response. But then, I'm not you. And, after all, it did seem to be the impetus for your acknowledging this:

Alcoholism doesn't negotiate with sobrietists under any circumstances.

Multiple lapses occur for a variety of reasons, but as long as you either deny your drinking's long-term effects or hold out hope that you don't have a problematic relationship with alcohol, it will be extremely difficult to commit to the changes that sobriety requires.

While you may be hurt by some of the posts, these types of posts are many times necessary to make us look at what we're doing more closely. It should be a serious wake up call that more needs to be done. We don't have unlimited chances to get sober. The damage that is done by alcohol is real. By looking at this truth, you can move yourself forward and make necessary changes so you can have success with sobriety. I believe you can do it!

One of the things I did when getting sober was promise myself that if I didn't get sober and couldn't get 90 days after several tries, I was going to implement more intensive treatment options. I didn't want to have to utilize those options, so I took my sobriety very seriously and did everything possible to make sure I kept sober. Have you thought about making yourself a similar kind of promise?

Eh, so someone offended me. Teflon mind. If someone else feels the need to be harsh when someone reaches out for support, that's not my problem.

I choose to focus on the fact that during the past 5 years I HAVE achieved some days and weeks without alcohol rather than seeing my lapses at failures. Shoot, what is success without failure? Sorry, I just don't buy into the whole "burning bush" and have some mystical experience and never drink again. That's not the reality for most of us. For those who do have that reality, great. I just prefer that they not guilt-trip the rest of the people who don't "get it" immediately. My journey is my journey, and I know that my experiences - successes, failures, all of it - will help other people.

I'm still here, and don't plan on going anywhere, regardless of whether or not I lapse. SR is a huge help. I spent time over on the very helpful weekender thread when I had urges (Thanks, Dee, for the link about handling cravings).

I did a SMART goal for stopping drinking. I decided to challenge myself to 30 days, which is totally doable instead of thinking of never drinking again. I used the same thing for fitness goals, and it's working well for me.

Progress not perfection. You are doing great !

I have realized that if I strive for perfection, I'll just give up because I can't attain perfection. I can come close, though! ;)

Lilac if you started 51 times, you can start a 52nd. I can't remember reading a day here when someone else hadn't had a 'lapse' as you put it. I have lapsed many times, although I wasn't on SR at the time, and it was hard to do it, and then only have myself to talk to about it.
I'm glad you're here and able to share what your brain is doing.
I need a place to vent my brain all over the place!
If you are serious, then you are there, if you are still negotiating, then you are not. It's that simple. If you want to do the 30 days then more power to you.
There is something incredibly scary and powerful about the words "I will never --------- again". It makes something forbidden. I never use those words. I simply use today. I will not today. That is all I can do and all I can control.