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I Hate Myself

Old 05-14-2015, 03:20 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Don't beat yourself up!! You can do this!!
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Old 05-15-2015, 06:46 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Day 2 and I feell amazing. I slept like a baby and woke refreshed. I read on another post someone said "I kept thinking when I could sneak off for a swig of vodka to go with my wine(for me is beer)" thats me and its a sad existance. If I can not handle a few beers and be happy on a saturday evening with friends then the beer wont be bought either. Vodka is the devil and will not be in our home anymore. I drank whiskey for years and never was or had to be sneaky. Had a bad day at work in 2013 and got vodka and OJ. Since then great things have happened in life but I have also become dependant/addicted.

Last night I heard 0 about the night before. Just love and kindness. I am one lucky man and have to kick the mess to the curb. There are 3 in my relationship right now and one has to go. I am not going to let it be me or her. Its going to be the Gilbys.
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Old 05-15-2015, 06:54 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Stay strong BD. So glad you woke up feeling amazing. Ride that energy and positive feeling all day.

Start making your plan for this weekend and stick to it, no matter what your AV says to you.

You can get through today and wake up tomorrow feeling the same way.

Lean on this community as much as you can. It helped me and many others here to have as much active participation as you can muster early on.

Awesome job on day 2; keep up the good work!
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Old 05-15-2015, 07:09 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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I just read your first post and smiled ruefully as that was me on numerous occasions, especially 13 hours ago when I woke up not remembering the last couple of hours before I went to bed. (But that's for elsewhere in my own messge thread!)

So glad you are feeling better today.
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Old 05-26-2015, 08:46 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Hey guys. I again did not make it through day 3. AV convinced me I felt good and it was the weekend. I have been drinking less and drank far less on the holiday weekend as I normaly would have. Today is day 2 and I am feeling good but a bit sick from sinuses.
I have had people talk to me about being in similar situations and how it was a choice "they had to make" to give up liquor. These people I have not shared my situation with. As yall know people that have been there just "know". They are so right. No one can make this choice for me. Day 3 will happen this time (third try will be a charm). Thank you guys for all the support. My last black out was just before this thread and liquor consuption has been far less.
Plan as of now is to never purchase any ever again. I will keep everyone up to date. For sure will be checking in tomorrow on that dreaded day 3!
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Old 05-26-2015, 09:28 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Hope you can let go of some of the self-hate right now, BD. It won't serve you well.

One thing that helped me accept what was going on and got me out of myself a bit was to read up on addiction and educate myself a little about things.

It might not help everyone though. But it sure did get me past the rough part and helped me focus on learning the tips and tricks to recognize the signs of and avoid relapse.
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Old 05-26-2015, 09:43 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Log in here and read/post as much as you can... I'm on day 9 and not sure I could have done it without this site. It has certainly been a lifesaver for me.
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Old 05-26-2015, 09:49 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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BD84, yes definitely, you are wasting time and energy hating yourself, you can figure this out, we are all rootin for ya.
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