Really struggling
 

Hey guys,

Just checking in, been back to work for 3 weeks or so now however already I'm starting to struggle with the general day. I'm dragging myself through at the minute but it seems to be getting harder to get out of bed- exactly where I was at the start of the depression in September.

I feel angry and I don't know why maybe it's all the demands of the work and the people, I feel angry towards even my girlfriend.

I really need to get a grip but feel pretty miserable about things right now

What's going on at work? Can you try and notice when you start to become angry at work and maybe identify the source of your anger? It can help to notice body sensations, thoughts, emotions, etc.

The tape that plays in our heads can be interesting to follow, and enlightening. So much of that can become automatic that we often don't realize just how much is due to habit, and how much can actually be changed.

I'd suggest maybe paying attention to your breathing, muscle tension, and all the thoughts that run through your head.

Here for you Stewy

I'm sorry you are having a horrid time at the moment.

Are you doing anything outside work for yourself? I have had a habit previously of becoming caught up with work, all the tensions and stressors and forgetting to have fun and do something engaging in the evenings. It might also help you figure out what it is that's stressing you out at work.

Sorry to hear that stewy - are you still seeing a counselor? Might be a good time to take inventory of where you are at and see if there is anything to change up in your routine. Or perhaps look at your meds and see if a change is necessary?

I'm getting angry at so many different things though, I feel upset with the job and the company, I have a huge headache tonight down to the amount of info I've had to take in

Thanks sober wolf

Yes I play football and guitar, I find the enjoyment is not there for these things due to the amount of strain I put myself under at work.

So many things are , it's a very intense work place and I manage staff and have a manager on my case too

Yes , every Tuesday and also CBT. Been doing plenty of exercise too.

I don't like the way these venlafaxine ones are making me feel but I'm stuck with them and I decided I was going to try and push forward and not worry about meds because even that was making me worry!

Stewy84
Is there a way for you to get out of work for your lunch. Maybe find a close park and take a walk? Maybe getting out of the situation even for a little bit would help easy your anger and tension?

When I do this, I'm so plugged in to what's happening at work, I'm unable to shut off properly and I don't enjoy the break for what it is.

I'm also getting some paranoia, though if I see it as that perhaps a good thing?

I remember you saying you wernt happy at this job around a month ago

If you changed job do you think it would help

If you need to talk at any time keep reaching out & you can send a pm 24h a day
bud

I genuinely have no idea what to do

I'm worried about the relationship between me and my daughter, she is growing up too fast, she spends all time seeing her friends and we don't spend as much time together as a result

Lots on your plate Stewie. Kids do grow and get interested in their friends over parents. It's natural. Maybe make a date night or afternoon with your daughter, just the two of you, to do some activities she enjoys.

You could look for a local circus or go ice skating

if shes older maybe cinema ?

I'm sorry you're still struggling with this Stewy.

Make sure you let all this out with your Dr/Counsellor - and know the SR community is always here :)

Thank you

There must be something wrong with me, something serious. I feel bad all the time. Why is that ?

I've just left the office at work to go to another meeting and just want the ground to swallow me up

Fallen out with girlfriend again

It sounds like you're depressed. Have you talked to someone about that? Hang in there friend.

Depression can be overwhelming Stewy.
It's not your fault and it's no reflection on you as a person.

I hope you'll continue to look for the right treatment mate.

Don't lose hope :)

D