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What keeps you moving forward?

Old 05-01-2015, 09:21 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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There is so much beauty in this world. I just want to be present and pay attention. I want to be useful and learn as much as I can while I am on this planet.
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Old 05-01-2015, 09:28 PM
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Originally Posted by TroyW View Post
Something I've been thinking about lately. What keeps you moving forward in life? We all need something larger than ourselves to continue pushing ourselves in this life.

Nothing, and I think that's why I have a hard time staying sober for long periods of time.

I'm single with no children and am always alone if I'm not at work. Basically, I have no one to help me stay sober on a daily basis besides myself, and that doesn't pan out too well when you're feeling lonely and depressed b/c you tend to not care about much.

That said, tomorrow morning is a new day and I'm sure I'll feel a little better in the morning. I just think the loneliness really hits me at night (especially on the weekends!) when I avoid the bars like I'm doing tonight. Now that I'm not out, I realize how lonely I am and it's not a good feeling... Especially when you attempt to hang out with new people but most are too busy with their own lives, partners, children, etc.

It's almost 9:30 pm here... Maybe I should just go to sleep. Thanks for letting me vent!
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Old 05-01-2015, 10:18 PM
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Ultimately I still focus on my kids - probably a given,
But with Sobriety I'm focusing on character improvement to help me. Not complaining, looking for positives, thinking of nice things to say and not participating in negative conversations. I find it really helps in not allowing yourself to get work up, which reduces and negativity in me and gives me a better, positive stronger outlook.
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Old 05-01-2015, 10:27 PM
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Golly!!! So many things I'm looking forward to since quitting the drink... Concerts, gym, getting out & doing some shopping, a holiday!!!!! These things I could never do while drinking, especially a holiday. i could not imagine getting on a plane while I was on the booze, scared of having a major panic attack but since quitting I havnt had a panic attack in 7 months now... There is so much out there that we miss while drinking. We get so wrapped up in the drink & it takes over our lives & becomes the priority ... Crazy but that is the nature of the beast..
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Old 05-01-2015, 11:33 PM
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Originally Posted by SoberRunner View Post
Nothing, and I think that's why I have a hard time staying sober for long periods of time.

I'm single with no children and am always alone if I'm not at work. Basically, I have no one to help me stay sober on a daily basis besides myself, and that doesn't pan out too well when you're feeling lonely and depressed b/c you tend to not care about much.

That said, tomorrow morning is a new day and I'm sure I'll feel a little better in the morning. I just think the loneliness really hits me at night (especially on the weekends!) when I avoid the bars like I'm doing tonight. Now that I'm not out, I realize how lonely I am and it's not a good feeling... Especially when you attempt to hang out with new people but most are too busy with their own lives, partners, children, etc.

It's almost 9:30 pm here... Maybe I should just go to sleep. Thanks for letting me vent!
I didn't think much of myself when I quit either.

But I decided to make decisions as though I had a healthy self
esteem - or as if I was making decisions for someone I had guardianship for.

Eventually those decisions resulted in change and I realised I really was worthwhile and worthy of the good decisions I was making.

Don;t let your inner addict convince you you're no good and that nothing matters anyway - that's just not true SoberRunner

D
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Old 05-02-2015, 01:29 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by MelindaFlowers View Post
I find life is pretty darn tolerable, even great sometimes without drinking and debilitating, daily hangovers. I find that planning highlights like concerts every few months really helps to break up the daily grind. I get down sometimes but I'm really looking forward to seeing Bette Midler next month!!!!! Wahoo!!!!
Bette midler is coming to Scotland in June and I was lucky enough to get tickets! Never thought I'd ever see her. If I were still drunk I probably never would!

Yay x
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Old 05-02-2015, 02:32 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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To be honest, getting off the roller coaster and just living my daily routine makes me content. I work. I spend time with my family & friends. I'm going to AA. I get things done around the house. I'm finishing my degree. I'm planning my first sober camping trip for later this summer.

So, daily life with a sprinkle of self-improvement and future planning seems to be working for me thus far.
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Old 05-02-2015, 02:36 AM
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What i'm doing right now is the most important thing for me to be doing . If it were otherwise i'd be wasting my time .

My life is pretty insignificant , doesn't mean it's not worthwhile .

the less i think about my life, the more i live my life. The more i live my life, the more i live my life .

Thought is mostly an abstraction which is useful for getting the things i need to operate and maybe achieve some comfort in society . It's bought about an extreme technological progress but i don't think i'm hugely different from a human 10,000 years ago other than ideas i've been given by the society I've grown in .

In the past i used to strive for some deeper meaning, some greater understanding and it caused me misery , the nearest i got to my utopia was through the experience of booze or drugs , the null zone of no thought .

When i just got sick to death of it all and the desire for it ended. I found out it was my desire for things to be other than how they were right now that was causing me all the pain and misery.
The body doesn't care for my ideas and is already living in glory and is in it's perfect environment upon this planet .

Just like sobriety , it's very simple but people seem to find it incredibly difficult .

I learn, i grow , one day i will wither and die , accept that I cant drink ever , accept this is it, stop struggling to eff the ineffable and enjoy the time of your life happening right now

Take care , m
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Old 05-02-2015, 03:00 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Definitely for my kids and my wife. No more wasted hours upon hours in a drunk state or hung over fog. No more dreading going on a walk or bike ride with my kids.

Not every day or hour is perfect, but it's so much better today than the past 21 years I spent in a constant fog.

Took the kids to the pool last night. They argued the whole time. Overall it wasn't a fun outing, but when i got home I thought to myself how lucky I was to have just spent time with them. To have the opportunity to be a part of their lives, right then, and to have taken advantage of the situation even through the arguing. During my drinking days I would have spent 95% of the time in the garage drinking my beer and wine. The kids are no longer an after-thought.

Now I stay sober because I don't want to miss out on my life.

Great post Troy by the way. Helps to remember why we are on this sober path, not just to avoid the negatives of drinking but to enjoy the positive benefits too!!
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Old 05-02-2015, 03:45 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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My daughter, my friends from AA, the birds at the raptor center I volunteer at.

Jennifer
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Old 05-02-2015, 03:53 AM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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I think it's important to plan ahead and keep busy. As a taxi driver, it's easy to get bored. I have the quiet spells to think about things. Since I sobered up (Over 9 weeks) I have cleared a lot of debt, Had tiime for family, Gained and now losing weight. We have now planned a summer holiday. I try to keep it simple and realistic. I could do with going to more meetings and spending more time on SR.
I think I have had 2 days off since I went back to work., I could badly do with a few days off to relax. Hopefully next week.
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Old 05-02-2015, 04:41 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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I am easily motivated, but I think my spirituality is an important part of that. I am one of those spiritual, but not religious people. I do believe in God, but not in a Biblical sense. Anyway, my point is that I suffer no existential angst. I just do my best to love others ( in every sense of the word-- helping a stranger on the street find the right building, spending play time with an abandoned kitten at the shelter, keeping a clean and organized home, etc.) and learn as much as I can. I think being sober liberates me from drawing inward, allowing me to appreciate all the Earth has to offer.
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Old 05-02-2015, 05:08 AM
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Goals. I had a lot of wants while I was drinking but now I have goals. I am actively moving towards them. For me I think I will always have to be achieving to succeed in sobriety/life. Right now my biggies are going back to school(start in a couple weeks!), fitness and building healthy relationships.

I started with fear and stubbornness. I WILL NOT DRINK! and I am so thankful for that but I don't think I would have lasted much longer on those alone.

Getting sober was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and I don't want to do it ever again. I will if I relapse but it seems easier to not relapse(not saying easy, just easier). Now it's about figuring out what I want out of life.

I am fortunate to have the support of a family I would never want to disappoint.


How about you Troy? Whats keeping you moving forward?
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Old 05-02-2015, 05:57 AM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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I struggle with motivation all the time. When it gets really bad I just wait for it to return and it always does.
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Old 05-02-2015, 10:01 AM
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I think building a better life, something to be proud of and one day being able to look back and say to myself I did alright.

That keeps me going!!
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Old 05-02-2015, 11:52 AM
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The 12 steps are a blueprint for living and I try to apply them however imperfectly. The wonderful thing about them is they give me an ideal to shoot for and a lifetime to get there.
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Old 05-02-2015, 12:10 PM
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Originally Posted by ArtFriend View Post
I struggle with motivation all the time. When it gets really bad I just wait for it to return and it always does.
Exactly, nothing wrong with sitting around the house in your pajamas for a few days.
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Old 05-02-2015, 01:09 PM
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My motivation is purely selfish at the moment. I don't want to be a slobbering moron. And that's precisely what drink does to me (and then some, of course).

I would like to eventually start seeing more beauty in the world. Currently I'm letting my brain recover from nearly a decade of torture.
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