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-   -   Tomorrow is my first AA meeting.... (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/365823-tomorrow-my-first-aa-meeting.html)

Mysusnshine1 04-27-2015 03:44 PM

Tomorrow is my first AA meeting....
 
I have avoided going to an AA meeting for over a year now. I have given my husband every excuse under the sun on why I don't need to go to AA. "AA is for alcoholic's, I just like wine." My eyes are clear now and I have come to realize that my love of wine has become a much bigger issue than I have ever allowed myself to see. My husband doesn't truest me and honestly I can't blame him. I wake up strong "No, wine today" then by the afternoon I'm a few glasses in and before he even gets home I'm to buzzed to have a conversation with him. He is so supportive and I couldn't ask for a better partner. He has agreed to go to the meeting with me tomorrow and I am so grateful. I am so very nervous about it, I don't know what to expect.
Has anyone been? Can you give me some idea about what my meeting will be like...I did find a meeting for beginners...

greens 04-27-2015 03:50 PM

That's great! I have never been to a newcomer meeting but in most meetings thy start out with readings , then dependING on the format they read from aa literature, or have a speaker talk about what it was like before aa, why they came, and what it's like after aa , or have a general topic to share on. The meeting is open for anyone who wants to share , then the meeting ends with a prayer. Lots of ppl focus on the newcomers since step 12 encourages working with newbies. Lots of woman may give u theor number for support, some meetings will give you free literature .
does that help?

greens 04-27-2015 03:51 PM

It's great that your husband is supporting you and will go to the meeting with you

Pete55 04-27-2015 03:57 PM


Can you give me some idea about what my meeting will be like...I did find a meeting for beginners...
Look for the beautiful 12 Steps.

Bmac 04-27-2015 03:59 PM

That's great. Enjoy! You will meet some great people there.

Soberwolf 04-27-2015 04:00 PM

Hello & Welcome MySunshine i think its really good going to an aa mtn esp a newcomers mtns the only thing i believe aa require is a desire to stop drinking

Nice to meet you mtns really helped me in the beginning

Ruby2 04-27-2015 07:31 PM

Hi and welcome to SR! I attend AA meetings for support. There are a lot of very supportive and welcoming people there. I did want to let you know that your husband may not be able to sit in at the meeting unless he too "has a desire to stop drinking." AA meetings are either open or closed. Open meetings are open to everyone. Closed meetings are limited to the people who wish to stop. However, don't let that stop you from going!!! Your husband can wait for you outside if he can't go in. I wish you well. Everyone is there for the same reason and everyone was new at one point.

Carlotta 04-27-2015 07:38 PM

Here is a link on what to expect at your first AA meeting. I hope it answers some of your questions
Your First AA Meeting. Understandably, You Want to Know What to Expect.
and this one addresses some concerns you might have
http://www.seattleaa.org/asked.html

:welcome to SR. You will find a lot of support on this forum too.

Mysusnshine1 04-27-2015 08:38 PM

Thank ya'll so very much. Your words and support mean a lot to me. This is a big step for me and like I said before I am nervous but I can't let that stop me from getting help and getting back to the old me.
Thank You All Again, Hope Ya'll Have A Good Night!
Sweet Dreams From Texas.

Mysusnshine1 04-27-2015 08:43 PM

Thank ya'll so very much. Your words and support mean a lot to me. This is a big step for me and like I said before I am nervous but I can't let that stop me from getting help and getting back to the old me.
Thank You All Again, Hope Ya'll Have A Good Night!
Sweet Dreams From Texas.

Iconoclastic 04-27-2015 09:55 PM


Originally Posted by Mysusnshine (Post 5341446)
I have avoided going to an AA meeting for over a year now. I have given my husband every excuse under the sun on why I don't need to go to AA. "AA is for alcoholic's, I just like wine." My eyes are clear now and I have come to realize that my love of wine has become a much bigger issue than I have ever allowed myself to see. My husband doesn't truest me and honestly I can't blame him. I wake up strong "No, wine today" then by the afternoon I'm a few glasses in and before he even gets home I'm to buzzed to have a conversation with him. He is so supportive and I couldn't ask for a better partner. He has agreed to go to the meeting with me tomorrow and I am so grateful. I am so very nervous about it, I don't know what to expect.
Has anyone been? Can you give me some idea about what my meeting will be like...I did find a meeting for beginners...

It was suggested when I was a newcomer at AA meetings / fellowship that I get the basic AA text titled “Alcoholics Anonymous” which I did. To my surprise, I discovered that the book Alcoholics Anonymous wasn’t written JUST for alcoholics, it was also written for non-alcoholics.

The AA suggested program of recovery is in the Alcoholics Anonymous textbook. It's based on one concept and that’s called the 12 Steps. The 12 Steps is a modality of self-examination and the tenets are 1000’s of years old. Anyone can benefit from the 12 Steps whether alcoholic or not. Many non-alcoholics use the 12 step model as a design for living, just as alcoholics and other drug addicts.

The suggestion to get the Alcoholics Anonymous textbook is one of many examples of information I received from AA meetings / fellowship members. I also met a fellowship member with a lot of experience in recovery and was helped with understanding the 12 Step model. Eventually we became close friends. I was told that if I took the 12 Steps, the odds were that I’d recover.

The Alcoholics Anonymous fellowship / meetings and the Alcoholics Anonymous suggested program of recovery are two different things. With AA meetings if you choose to share, sharing your story in a general way is suggested. What I began to realize early on is that when members shared their stories sometimes their experience was similar to mine and then I didn’t feel so alone. This helped me not isolate and it help in my recovery, when I was taking the 12 Steps which is the actual suggested program.

Carlotta 04-28-2015 01:00 PM

How did it go?

Mysusnshine1 04-28-2015 03:51 PM


Originally Posted by Carlotta (Post 5342993)
How did it go?

The meeting isn't until 8pm Texas time. So we haven't left yet. I'll update when we get back.
Thanks for checking in on me.

Dee74 04-28-2015 03:52 PM

best wishes mysusnshine :)

D

murrill 04-28-2015 04:11 PM

I don't remember many specifics of my first meetings since I was in treatment at the time, but by the time I was discharged I knew that I wanted to be a part of this fellowship. I met people who had done what did (and worse!), yet they were committed to sobriety. They were happy, joyous, and free. I wanted that. Their stories gave me hope, and I found comfort in discovering I was not alone. I learned to arrive a little early, get a cup of coffee, and introduce myself to someone. Many meetings ask if there are any newcomers who would like to introduce themselves. That's optional, but I found it helped me to become a part of something greater than I. Some meetings will discuss a topic (or two) than is brought by a member; sometimes they will read and discuss some AA literature. You can speak if you like, or you can pass. You might get telephone numbers from other people: Use them! I hope you find the warmth and unconditional love I found in AA. It has been the foundation of sobriety for me.

Mysusnshine1 04-28-2015 08:30 PM

First meeting is done and over with
 
After so many times of getting out of AA (from my husband) I have finally gone to my first meeting. It was not at all what I was expecting. I was the only female (other than the meeting host) and felt a little like an outsider. I was even more surprised to see that all but two other members where forced there by the court. I guess I had thought that people that go to these meetings where there on their own willingness to become better. I can say that a couple of them seem to have truly benefited from this program. I left feeling a little mad and disappointed and determined to find a women's group. However after a little more thought I think I'll give this misfit group another shot. My husband was allowed to come to the meeting and was told by other members about a family meeting that happens on Friday nights.
Thank you call for your support I will keep y'all posted on my steps forward. :a122:

greens 04-28-2015 08:38 PM

Yes a woman's meeting might be a good idEa. There is also another organization called woman for sobriety (not affiliated with aa) they have a few face to face meetings But not nearly as many as aa. Best of luck!

Carlotta 04-28-2015 08:44 PM

I really like your willlingness and open mindedness :)
Definitely look into other meetings. A women's group would be a good idea also Google your town AA meetings and see what other meetings there are.
I am not too fond of court slips meetings either but it makes sense that they would tend to go to a beginner meeting instead of a Steps or BB meeting. You want to find people with some recovery going who work the program of AA, not people dodging jail time and facing the consequences of their actions.
I hope your husband likes Al Anon :)
In the interim, I would suggest that you join the class of April on SR where you can give and get support from your peers who have quit at the same time as you did
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-3-a-12.html
and also check in daily with the 24 hours Recovery Connections where we commit not to drink or drug for the next 24 hours
It is a fun supportive way to hold ourselves accountable
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-54-a-8.html

Ruby2 04-28-2015 08:52 PM

Ditto what Carlotta says about different meetings and the court slips. You do want to find meetings with people with a little more time in. It can be a wonderful place to go but when people are there to get off the hook, well, they do the bare minimum unless they are truly done.

The family meeting sounds promising. And a woman's meeting. Great that you went!

Mysusnshine1 04-28-2015 09:01 PM

WOW.....Thanks Carlotta! Those are all great suggestions, I'll join both of those.
I'm hoping with SR and AA that I can find my inner strength and start enjoying life with out always wondering where my next buzz is coming from. I'm going to stay away from the women's group at the moment. I feel like there could be women there with stories much like mine. At the moment that would only be a trigger for me. I'm sure that may sound odd but I have a lot of pain surrounding my drinking (like many others I'm sure) and I want to know I have control over my drinking before being triggered by someone that might have a story like my own. Thank you again for all your continued support!


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