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Do you have a longing? A quiet grief? An unanswered call?

Old 04-19-2015, 05:33 AM
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Do you have a longing? A quiet grief? An unanswered call?

One aspect of addiction not covered much in the rooms, the recovery literature or even here in personal experiences - is the call of the soul.

Depth psychology - and many poets and nature-based cultures - suggest that a major cause of addiction is the unanswered call.

In this modern world, so much time and attention is given to ego-based pursuits of the game of life.... That some say it is a sickness of society itself which drives addiction.

I powerfully relate to this and have felt for a very long time some fundamental misalignment, loneliness, grief - which I increasingly associate with my own unanswered call. My soul wound.

I wonder if there are others whose experience of addiction and recovery includes this theme?
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Old 04-19-2015, 05:41 AM
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Great insight FreeOwl. I do feel this way. Just this weekend in fact I have been struggling internally with my life and lack of it.

Someone asked me how I express myself. That was last week. I got stymied by the fact I could not answer. I got angrier and angrier. How can I be this old and not know how to express myself.

My inner calling has always been to be around people and help if I can yet I hide in myself and not many around me know how I feel.

I have never been an ego based person. But I need to heal my wounded soul.

Thanks and am interested in others perspective.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:01 AM
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Check out a book called 'Soulcraft' - by Bill Plotkin.

It may open something for you.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:04 AM
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:15 AM
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For myself the hole could only be filled by a higher power who I choose to call God. I have found spirituality is so much more than a belief in an all powerful force. It is incorporating the teachings of the great enlightened ones into the daily fabric of my life. Prayer, love, enlightenment, being the best I can be, helping others, and turning my will and life over to the care of God are some these of the things I do that fill the hole that I tried unsuccessfully to fill with alcohol
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:22 AM
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Honestly? I've lived in too many countries, and met too many people. I think I've pretty much given up on humanity at this point.

As for a higher calling? Sure, I believe in it. This universe is so vast, it'd be somewhat ignorant not to, in my mind. It's what keeps me wondering whether or not I want to continue being alive.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:29 AM
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I have a lot of unanswered calls... need to get voicemail.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:29 AM
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Originally Posted by TroyW View Post
Honestly? I've lived in too many countries, and met too many people. I think I've pretty much given up on humanity at this point.

As for a higher calling? Sure, I believe in it. This universe is so vast, it'd be somewhat ignorant not to, in my mind. It's what keeps me wondering whether or not I want to continue being alive.
When we have given up on humanity we have given up on ourselves. I absolutely refuse to do that. I make the world a better place by helping those I can.

Just a few minutes ago a neighbor wants me to talk to her sister in law about her son drinking himself to death. If I can bring some healing to this woman then I have made the world a better place
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:29 AM
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MI... I agree that the power greater than ourselves is important....

I just believe that the power greater than ourselves isn't the whole shooting match.

The power deep within ourselves is equally important and too often overlooked by many spiritual' paths.

I believe our soul's wisdom is of and part of spirit's - and to deny or ignore our inner selves, placing all our importance on 'our higher power' leaves us wounded and grieving.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:34 AM
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Hello:

Thanks for this post. It's very interesting.

I am going to sound dismissive but I believe that a lot of it has to do with "first world problems", that void.

Nowadays we have so much free time and that is the root of problems in my opinion. Thousands of years ago we were so preocupied with living, finding subsistence, water, that we really didn't have time for our AV's to show.

I am a very strange person. On the one hand I hate humans, I think that we are a pest, I see no hope in the future. On the other hand I feel so happy and positive with the life I have. I am by no means rich, but I do have everything I need and then some.

I feel we all need to find that meaning that we long for and for me is to live in the now. I don't take anything for granted and I enjoy every second I get.

Now, "FWP" are real, however when I have one I try to get perspective but I realize that I make them bigger than we they really are...

I do believe in a higher power that resides in me.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:42 AM
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I think you're onto something... The largest 'first world problem' is the death of our 'old world selves'.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:44 AM
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Yes! I long for my primitive self!!!
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:47 AM
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Then why not move to Somalia? You can be as primitive as you want there.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:49 AM
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Not primitive enough for me. 1st world problems there too.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:50 AM
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How about the Brazilian rain forest? There's still a few tribes there who haven't seen modern civilization yet. heh, this conversation reminds me of this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEY58fiSK8E
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:52 AM
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It's not so much about place as it is about how fully we inhabit OUR place.

Though I do feel that a solid connection to the wildness of the earth and the universe is a key part of what's been lost in much of contemporary society
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:56 AM
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Dear Troy:

Those tribes are dealing with the REALEST FWP, losing their territories, dealing with poachers, logging companies, scrutiny from outside world, the governments of the country that happened to end up with etc., etc...

I see what you mean but I think that you are missing my point.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:58 AM
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Nice thread FreeOwl.

I don't know that my 'soul wound' is completely fixable. The scars are undeniable. Drowning it in alcohol postponed addressing what will always be there in a more productive way. That's how we got to this age with it Imo Weasel. The hole in me requires something outside of me to fill it. That 'something' seems hesitant to reveal itself to me despite my longing. Makes me feel like I must not be worth the effort....and that makes me want to drink. My hope is that my perspective is still off. So I persevere.
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Old 04-19-2015, 07:02 AM
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Originally Posted by Nowsthetime View Post
Dear Troy:

Those tribes are dealing with the REALEST FWP, losing their territories, dealing with poachers, logging companies, scrutiny from outside world, the governments of the country that happened to end up with etc., etc...

I see what you mean but I think that you are missing my point.
No, I don't think I am. If you're an anarchist and want a primitive lifestyle, it's definitely available to you in this world. If you want to complain because of the life of unbelievable convenience you were born into due to modern technology, not much I can do to help. If you think there's a better societal option out there, not once has it been proven. There was one Ancap society back in the day that formed in Iceland, but it didn't last long, and is the best example anarchists have, which isn't a very good one.

Here's another vid:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAOrT0OcHh0

I might be a depressed drunk, but at least I'm appreciative of the conveniences the modern world brings.
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Old 04-19-2015, 07:14 AM
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I'm afraid i just dumped the whole stinking bunch of ideas .

One day i'm not going to have a tomorrow, how much of the time between now and then am i willing to spend in misery looking to eff the ineffable .

I wanted life to be never ending bliss and beatitude without one moment of pain , alcohol was the nearest thing to that for me for a while .

Even then the pain invaded my bubble .

For me it was the desire which bought about my misery . Accepting everything the good , the bad and ugly means i have no questions about life , no hole to fill as anguish is caused when you don't have what you want .
It was my want of need that caused pain , the desire to escape the pain is the very thing which causes it .
Just drop the whole mess , time is flying by and there is a whole glorious world out there and we only live 80 odd years if we are lucky , how much time are you going to spend asking yourself unanswerable questions ? trying to fill this hole that doesn't physically exist .

I hear you saying oh thats easy for mex to say , yupp it is .. and like not drinking, it is very simple , it's just that we believe we'll loose something of ourselves in the dropping of it .
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