i have someone new in my corner
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Boston, MA.
Posts: 1,756
i have someone new in my corner
A very very very old friend; 25+ years has reached out to me. & I think she is willing to take me to the junkie clinic & hold my hand to keep me from totally losing it. I don't want this b\c I feel it's something I should be doing on my own; but also know I wouldn't do it own my own. I would attempt it, freak out on the bus & get off after 3 stops hyperventilating.
But she has been a friend of the family for 25yrs and has seen how I drank and my anxiety & all the ugly in me. But as she said tonight; which caught me off guard, has seen the beautiful "soul" I have. I fail to see it, but that just maybe the dark place I'm in.
I'm not apologizing for my recent rant, but I do want to apologize for making it public. White knuckling it is hard, especially when I let few in & trust even less.
The mental health worker whom directed me to this place did it b\c of my physical as well mental issues. But it's 1st come 1st serve, so the homeless have an edge on me there. Yes I'm petrified, yes I'm doing it. YES I am sober today.
Dennis
Sent from my Nexus 7 using Sober Recovery
But she has been a friend of the family for 25yrs and has seen how I drank and my anxiety & all the ugly in me. But as she said tonight; which caught me off guard, has seen the beautiful "soul" I have. I fail to see it, but that just maybe the dark place I'm in.
I'm not apologizing for my recent rant, but I do want to apologize for making it public. White knuckling it is hard, especially when I let few in & trust even less.
The mental health worker whom directed me to this place did it b\c of my physical as well mental issues. But it's 1st come 1st serve, so the homeless have an edge on me there. Yes I'm petrified, yes I'm doing it. YES I am sober today.
Dennis
Sent from my Nexus 7 using Sober Recovery
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Boston, MA.
Posts: 1,756
Originally Posted by MythOfSisyphus 
That's great, Dennis. I think one of the biggest mistakes we make- especially males- is that we think we can do everything alone. Sometimes we can't, and there's no shame it that. It means we're human.
It's been clouded for 30 years now & the physical pain has taken me to the edge. My younger brother has even noticed; that alone scares me cause I've never let him "see" into my life. But something has to be done; dad is being difficult & it is all him; not his stroke. I need to step up for mom & so I can get the hell out of this town lol
Dennis
Sent from my Nexus 7 using Sober Recovery
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