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Thatdeliveryguy 04-11-2015 10:48 AM

sobering up and I start again
 
Well, seems as thought I've got myself into a bit of trouble again. Got a few bucks to my name and decided to drink. Read my post from the other day ( and don't remember writing any of it) I am glad it got closed becasuse I was descending into nothingness.

I thank all that replied, I am sorry, I do read all the replies and am forever grateful for the responses and advice. I am often locked in a horrible mentality, so I don't always reply and I am sorry.

Today isn't actually day one, I can't lie, I have 5 beers left, I am slowly drinking them, probably not the best idea, but I don't know what to do.

I am going to start again, Monday I am going to have to repair what damage I can. I actually gave rehab this website address, and told them I use here for help. Anything I type here well be read. Maybe its best, at least I was honest.

I don't know why I can't stay stopped, this truly troubles me. I am at a loss, sober felt great. I loved being sober, things were on the way up, and then I blew, got a little beer then went off the deep end.

Bmac 04-11-2015 10:51 AM


Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy (Post 5312746)

Today isn't actually day one, I can't lie, I have 5 beers left, I am slowly drinking them, probably not the best idea, but I don't know what to do.

Yes, you do know what to do.

Anna 04-11-2015 10:56 AM

Please come back when you are not drinking, Jeremy, thanks.

Thatdeliveryguy 04-11-2015 11:02 AM

Sorry Anna, I will sober up and then comeback

RobbyRobot 04-11-2015 11:04 AM


Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy (Post 5312746)
I don't know why I can't stay stopped, this truly troubles me. I am at a loss, sober felt great. I loved being sober, things were on the way up, and then I blew, got a little beer then went off the deep end.

I think when we are also required to deal with mental illness, it becomes important to not have one feed the other. What I mean is this: alcoholism was itself the result of my chronic drinking, not my mental illness. As well, my alcoholism did not itself create my mental illness. Both of these stood on their own causes and effects. Certainly together things can go south quickly. Nonetheless, the more I blamed myself, or my alcoholism, or my mental illness, the more I weakened my resolve and resources to keep sober.

Jeremy, from what I have been able to glean from your threads, you seem to play one against the other, yes?

As for those beers....

Dump them. There is no better time to quit than now, yeah?

EDIT: I agree of course, posting while drunk doesn't always have upsides.

Venecia 04-11-2015 11:31 AM

I hope this was the last wake-up call. Please work with your counselors to get into inpatient immediately. You know it's time, Jeremy.

ScottFromWI 04-11-2015 11:40 AM

1. Quit drinking

2. Take your meds

3. Schedule inpatient detox...today.

Those are the only 3 things you should be considering now.

Lenina 04-11-2015 11:43 AM

Agree with Scott. those are the three best options for you today, First things first.

This doesn't have to get any worse, dear TDG.

Love from Lenina

PurpleKnight 04-11-2015 12:06 PM

Welcome back Jeremy!! :)

2muchpain 04-11-2015 01:57 PM

You know what you need to do. You just don't want to do it. John

CelticZebra 04-11-2015 02:02 PM


Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy (Post 5312764)
Sorry Anna, I will sober up and then comeback

I choose not to drink.
You too have that choice.
Choose LIFE
Or choose not

I hope you make the right choice for you x

Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself

Della1968 04-11-2015 06:15 PM


Originally Posted by Lenina (Post 5312844)
Agree with Scott. those are the three best options for you today, First things first.

This doesn't have to get any worse, dear TDG.

Love from Lenina

Actually at this point Jeremy these are your only options. You can't keep doing this.

Marcher13 04-11-2015 06:21 PM


Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy (Post 5312746)
I don't know why I can't stay stopped

I think you can't stay stopped Jeremy because you view this as a bit of a game. You refer to "being good", "playing by the rules" and so on.

This isn't a game, this is your life.

neferkamichael 04-11-2015 06:31 PM

Jeremy, rootin for ya. :egypt:
http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs27/f/20...by_Frankii.jpg

Longpasttime 04-11-2015 11:03 PM

When you wake up and check in on the thread, do no explaining, apologizing, pontificating, analyzing, defending... do what scott said below immediately. Nothing else. Please bro, okay?



Originally Posted by ScottFromWI (Post 5312834)
1. Quit drinking

2. Take your meds

3. Schedule inpatient detox...today.

Those are the only 3 things you should be considering now.


Soberween 04-11-2015 11:16 PM


Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy (Post 5312746)

I don't know why I can't stay stopped, this truly troubles me. I am at a loss, sober felt great. I loved being sober, things were on the way up, and then I blew, got a little beer then went off the deep end.

This is where those three words come into play: cunning, baffling, powerful.

At least you are going to give it another shot, TDG. Never give up. It will eventually stick. You seem like a really nice person and I'm rooting for you.

DrunkenDonuts 04-11-2015 11:22 PM

Hope you're getting all the help you want TDG. All the best!

Jeni26 04-11-2015 11:33 PM

Am I the only one who thinks that we are unwittingly becoming part of the problem with Jeremy? I really feel that some people become hooked on the drama that writing desperate posts cause.

I am in no doubt that you have some serious problems Jeremy and my heart hurts for you. But you have been helped time and time again by people, some of whom are in the same dire situations. If you took the time to re-read some of the excellent posts when you are clear headed and sober, you will read about people who have overcome exactly the same problems you have.

I'm not sure that any of us are helping you at all by answering you when you are drunk. We just become players in your games.

It is all very sad.

Thepatman 04-12-2015 12:03 AM


Originally Posted by Jeni26 (Post 5313598)
Am I the only one who thinks that we are unwittingly becoming part of the problem with Jeremy? I really feel that some people become hooked on the drama that writing desperate posts cause. I am in no doubt that you have some serious problems Jeremy and my heart hurts for you. But you have been helped time and time again by people, some of whom are in the same dire situations. If you took the time to re-read some of the excellent posts when you are clear headed and sober, you will read about people who have overcome exactly the same problems you have. I'm not sure that any of us are helping you at all by answering you when you are drunk. We just become players in your games. It is all very sad.

Sadly I agree with you Jeni. I have followed your situation Jeremy, tried to help like so many others. I saw your post this week, thought "ho crap here we go again".
We love you man, please get help. It's been a year on this merry go round. I know it's hard, and understand I am one of those that seem to have a hard time staying quit. But I am trying options, last one being to get myself diagnosed for mental health issues, or depression, or whatever the hell is wrong with me. I go 3 months, then fall, rinse repeat. So piggy back on me if you want. But man, try to chip away at this with some serious moves. There is a way out, for some it just takes more tweaking. Tweak away Jeremy ;-)

TroyW 04-12-2015 12:06 AM

Here, if no one else wants to say it, I will:

Quit seeking attention, and get yourself the help you know you need. We're not your pawns, and what you're doing is disrespectful.


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