GhostFace

Good Morning,

I few weeks back i endend up with my second DUI, the bad thing is that i was going to get some food and got pulled over three blocks from my house. This has caused me mayor depression, not wanting to live any more. I feel like i let myself and my family down.

The morning is a struggle to get up just thinking about the consiquenses from losing my job, not able to drive for 2 - 4 years, lawyer fees and fines. I feel like a broken record telling myself to quit but keep doing what i should not be doing. The start of this year ive been having bad anxiety and alot of stress at work. My co-workers even notice the change in my attitude not wanting to talk to anybody.

Today is back to day 1. I felt some relieve going through the forum and seeing others who had the same problem and able to overcome. Im having trouble facing my problem and dwelling on the negative. I think its time to seek help, be more supportive on this forum and face my problems like a man.

My lawyer told me the consiquences im facing but also reminded me that im 29 years old and have alot ahead of me. Im thankful for my family for being suporrtive and helping me through this tough time. But im also shameful for making the same mistake twice and even going on this forum with so many relapse.

Had to vent a little, hope everyone is having a sober and happy day.

andy8m

Like you said man up to the consequences. They will be relatively short-term in the scheme of things and one day be just a distant memory. The best thing to do is work on your recovery so when you can drive you have a long period of abstinence behind you (might impress judge a bit if you can demonstrate positive steps you are now taking). Good luck things will get better if you stop

ScottFromWI

Welcome back GhostFace. It never gets better when you keep drinking unfortunately.

Do you have a plan of any kind or any ideas about how you might go about making this your last Day1? Obviously whatever you have been doing is not working...maybe it's time to try somethign different? Meetings? Counseling? Rehab? Just throwing some ideas out there.

2muchpain

I remember when I got my DUI standing at this window in the lawyers office. After he explained to me all the consequences because of this, I came within a hair of jumping out of the window. I felt that my whole life was over. If my family wasn't there, I definitely would of done it. It felt so right at the time. Turns out all was not lost and I got a lot of support including long-term treatment. I'd be dead today if it wasn't for getting that DUI.
I'd like to say I never drank since then, but that would not be true. But it helped me turn a corner that helped me take my drinking seriously. Sometimes, it takes a while, and unfortunately more consequences before sobriety takes hold. I believe each consequence is a nudge from my HP to push me in the right direction. Lucky for me, my HP is more stubborn than I am. Your probably closer to getting and staying sober than you think. John

ClearMind

Hey man,

What's done is done. Dwelling on the past can't help you, only in that you learn from it and make sure it doesn't happen again. You can choose to make this be your "bottom" and move forward from here. Your lawyer is right, you're only young yet, and you have your whole life ahead of you.. this could be the turning point.. you could keep going downwards or you could learn from this and improve your life. You really need to set up a plan though, to recover.. because if you don't, things will be fine for a few days and then the mindset you're in right now will fade and you'll be thinking you can drink again. Good luck man! GhostFace rocks!

sva777

Think of it this way, if you stop drinking you will never have to worry about getting another DUI. I hope you figure out a plan to get through this, I will be rooting for you.

Fly N Buy

Glad you're posting - not judging for sure, I drank and drove on more than one occasion. Just never got caught........

We both made the same mistake. It was not the driving part but the drinking part.
Removing alcohol and other substances from daily life gives me a new outlook - and I am not young. Stop now, seek help and you'll have more opportunities in life than you can imagine.

Keep coming back!

Wastinglife

I got a DUI ten years ago this month. It was the first time my life had suffered a serious consequence from drinking. I should have taken it as a sign I had a problem, but the DUI actually marked the beginning of a long descent into full blown alcoholism. I never bothered to get my license back as I took the subway to work anywaycwhich, in hindsight, probably prevented a 2nd or 3rd DUI because my drinking got much worse in the ensuing years.

Address your drinking and make sobriety your number one focus. The rest will sort itself out with time and sobriety.

thomas11

Hi ghost, I understand being very bummed out about what happened. 2 DUI's at 29, that can be pretty daunting. At the same time, you are 29, on SR since 2013 and fully recognize there may be an issue. 2 DUI's is not the end of the world. First things first, do what you need to do to sober up and stay sober. Based on your post, it sounds as if that is what you really want to do, and we all know you can do it.

MIRecovery

DUIs are a symptom of the disease of alcoholism. While a 2nd offense is definitely a problem it is a short term problem. Alcoholism is progressive and only gets worse. The world record holder I know in AA is 9 DUIs and he has served multiple years in prison for his alcohol offenses.

I know likely 20 people with multiple DUIs and all are living a happy sober life today.

Start today and do what you need to do get and stay sober.

Soberwolf

Hi Ghostface good to see you friend, here are a couple links to help with building a sobriety plan http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html

Glad your back for me acceptance is key Ghostface spk soon friend

brynn

Hey ghost!

I've been exactly where you are and it sucks BUT I promise you can get through it and yes....there is life after 2 DWIs! I'm living proof that you can turn this around and you can have the life you so desperately want! Yeah...the consequences suck, but you can and will get through it all.
It all starts with changing your thoughts and , of course, putting down the bottle once and for all. I had to let go of all the negative self talk and begin believing that I was WORTH saving!
I love my life now! I am empowered and free of the bonds of alcohol and I know that if I have the strength to overcome addiction, then I can do anything!
I wish you all the best on your journey!

FreeOwl

it's a crappy situation - of your own making.

So now you have a choice; what will you make of it from here?

Will you sulk and slide further into a place of darkness and despair - or will you take it one step at a time, deal with it, accept it, find peace with it and turn it into the best damn turning point you possibly can?

I got a second DUI a few years ago myself. It sucked.... but I'm past it, I'm sober, my life is good and always getting better.

It wasn't easy - but choosing to make it the best I could and choosing to take it one step at a time and remain positive about it made all the difference. Also - finally deciding to embrace sobriety was essential to really completing the turnaround story.

Hang in there, find goodness... it's all around, even in the bad times.

totfit

I assure you from experience it is far from the end of the world. As a matter of fact the time I spent unchained from an automobile turned out to be one of the better periods of my life (the sober time anyway). That experience is part of what made me who I am today and I would not go back and change it. I am not going to tell my story, but I had consequences that were much greater than just a second DUI. You can and will get through it AND you can even thrive, not only on the other side but during the process. It is up to you.

Anna

I hope you decide to come up with a plan to stop drinking. I'm sure you are very depressed and discouraged right now, but you can move forward if you stay sober.

GhostFace

Thank you all. I feel much better knowing that people been thru this and we're able to get by. I am my worst enemy at times and I always focus on the future and what life would be without drinking.

My situation is bad but will resolve with time. Now it all depends on me.

Will I keep drinking?

Absolutely not, but it's easier said than done. Sobriety would be a whole new beginning and alot of change, of course for the better but it will definitely take me out my comfort zone. I'm still dwelling about that night as my sense told me to stay home and not drink since I was still recovering from the night before of heavy drinking. I can't change the past so I need to move forward.

I live in a state were having a car is crucial to get around. If my license is suspended, my commute will go from 15 minutes in
Car to one hour and 30 minute's on bus. This is my biggest fustration

ScottFromWI

I can understand your frustration, but quite frankly your biggest problem seems to be your drinking. You just mentioned that you got this DUI on a day when you didn't even plan on drinking anyway, yet you got drunk and got in your car. Think of how "frustrating" it will be if you get a 3rd DUI and end up in jail. Or get in an accident and injure/kill someone while driving drunk.

You mention that living sober woudl take you out of your "comfort" zone. Is getting a second DUI and facing the consequences of it really all that comfortable?

GhostFace

You are absolutely right! I always think about the happy moment and numbness from pain when I drink. But, I fail to realize the money wasted, hangover and stress I cause my family.

Me being anti social has caused me to drink to excesses but for the past few months I find that I'm drinking in a room by myself. I recall shameful times of me doing stupid things being drunk and also blackouts and other things I don't want to mention.

This is definitely not a comfortable state

ccam1973

GF, you have the power to quit. You never have to go through that again, but you have to want to be sober.

I wish I had decided to quit at 29 instead of a decade later. Nothing good will come from drinking even one more day.

You've got this. You'll hear it many times here, over and over... "If I can do it then anyone can". It's the truth. Those of us with any sober time under our belts got there by gritting out teeth during the hard times and doing what ever it took to not drink today. It does get easier with time, but you've got to get through today first.

Be tough, make a plan, make an alternate plan for when your plan veers off path, and DON'T DRINK TODAY.

We are in your corner!

sg1970

What you are facing right now is nothing compared to if you would have killed someone with your drinking and driving.