Easyvictor

Hi zaboozer,

Well done on your recovery. It seems that you are really hanging in there. You are a complete stranger to me but I can honestly say I am proud of you. I am on day 3, myself. It is Memorial Day weekend here in the states so we have Monday off--a perfect time for me to lay low, do nothing, and quit this cycle of drinking I have had for 14 years. Your day to day logs are a great inspiration for me. Don't give up the fight.

ZaBoozer

Hey EV,

Ta a lot, much appreciated.

I wanted to use a long weekend as well, but it didn't work that way for me.

You hang in there mate. You really can do this. You just have to take baby steps and do it one day at a time. Remember, you will be fine as long as you don't take the first drink.

My pleasure with the posts. Have you thought of starting your own log?

Cheers,

ZAB

martina12

Wowzas wonderful fireplace Zab! you have set the benchmark I am going to have to see if I can get my Victorian fireplace anywhere near that now...

ZaBoozer

Ta martina, now you know why my temperature upstairs is ~30°C. It also give you an idea why the cats love it and why I am not too fond of leaving home.

Our houses here in SA don't cater for Victorian fireplaces. I do have an open fireplace (it replaced this one) that I don't know where to install. I am leaning towards the guest room at the moment. I am also considering installing another one like this downstairs in the lounge.

Cheers,

ZAB

martina12

The only reason I have a Victorian fire place is because I have a Victorian house!

I think I have the a boarded up Victorian fireplace in the dining room and also in the bedrooms upstairs...the chimney stacks are still there but I haven't investigated them...hmmm maybe I should?!

M

sva777

I like your fireplace, it's the summer here now so no need for one now but I would love to have one come winter.

ZaBoozer

Hey M,

It is not my fault you live in a Victorian house is it?

I believe that it is a major thing there in the UK to get everything certified etc. I also think you have to get it re-certified with existing installations? Sa is rather lax on the health and safety laws.

You should definitely. It really changes the atmosphere.

Cheers,

ZAB

ZaBoozer

Ta SVA,

We are in autumn going into winter. You should definitely look at a closed combustion type of fireplace/stove. Also make sure you can burn both wood and anthracite in it. Hardly any work at all. Mine runs 24/7 even when I am at work. I just put anthracite in in the morning and again in the evening. Other than that I just empty the ash pan every second day.

Cheers,

ZAB

martina12

I suspect you are playing with me Z

Therefore I shall play back ...I rather like my old Victorian house with its old Victorian fireplace and its old quaint Victorian windows and old decorative cornicing with antique candelabra...I kid you not!!

I really must get up to date!
m

ZaBoozer

Good evening all,

I have reached the end of day forty eight. It wasn't as bad as it might have been. Business first.

Physically I am great. My muscles are a little sore. Not used to hard menial labour. I have got soft in my old age. I am a little tired. There is no sign of fatigue. Mind you, that is only a problem when I am at work. I really wonder if the building I work in has something to do with it. My headache did fade during the day. It didn't go completely, but rather was just there to keep me aware of it. I didn't smoke too much today, just over a pack. I have been drinking a new NA beer. Not bad. I have also been drinking copious amounts of milo and Horlicks. Oh, and ice cream and chocolate. My day off I suppose.

Mentally I am fine. I did not get to do any work work. We had load shedding this side. So when my power was off - work was on and when work was on, my power was off. Our power utility is under huge strain this side. I did get to thinking a lot, so that was great. It is always great when you can reason with yourself.

Emotionally I am good. I only had a low point this afternoon. L is a female dog. I was lucky enough to keep myself busy, it was only during the breaks that L kicked in.

Well the builders did not pitch. So I started the tiling myself. I am about halfway. Not a train smash at all. I work a lot slower than them, but I work a helluva lot neater than them. So I think it is really going to turn out great. I am tiling the patio the same colour and tile type that I used inside. I am considering using a different colour to do the border tiles. I think that would be great. I will post a pic when I get to that stage. Then you can all give your input.

Tonight's movie seems to be ok. I am watching while I type this. The movie is "Divergent". Seems alright. Last night I watched "The Expendables 2". My type of mindless movie. It put me right in the mood for sleep.

Tomorrow is the start of another harrowing week. There is a cloud of despair about at work. With all the strike action and power woes etc. going on at the moment, a lot of projects are being shelved. Companies are just not building anything with all the uncertainty at the moment. I have spoken with friends who are in the same game but at different companies, and their outlook is just as grim as mine. They have already been through huge job cuts. It is only a matter of time before my company has to do the same. It is a bit depressing being in that environment, but there is not much I can do about it. The work outlook here in SA is just not good, and will not get better for at least the next five years.

I have given this a lot of thought, especially with the predicament I find myself in with my wife. It is not easy to make any decision regarding my future at the moment as I don't have a clue whether it is just me or us I am making a decision for. Hence the importance of the timeline I have spoken about.

One thing I can tell you though, this is the first time I am going through something like this sober. It is like seeing things from a totally different perspective. Am I worried about losing my job? Yes, but it would not be the end of the world. There is a lot of work out there. Not here in SA, but Africa is taking off. Am I worried about losing my wife? Yes, but there is nothing I can do to influence her at this point in time.

There is only one thing I can do, and that is to keep on at me. Day by day I learn more about myself. I gain more control over myself as well as more confidence. I am not so afraid of the future. All is not doom and gloom.

Well, the cats have climbed on the bed. They are in their spots. I am not sure if they know that they are cats. Or maybe they know that they're cats when it suits them. They follow me around like dogs. They even sat and kept me company today while I was tiling. It is a different form of company I suppose. I wonder where I can go to learn cat?

Well time for me to browse through the posts one last time and then to give my undivided attention to the TV.

Be safe and be strong.

Cheers,

ZAB

CaseyW

Congrats on day 48. Enjoyed reading your thoughts to yourself on your job and wife. All of the stuff you said is pretty universal and I got a lot out of it. Thank you for sharing your sobriety with me.

ZaBoozer

Haha M,

Victorian is cheap. You should move up in life.

Just kidding. We really do not have anything like that here in SA. The closest I have got to that is when I have visited the UK. I would love something that has so many rooms and fireplaces. I love fireplaces. Can you imagine having them all running at the same time?

Cheers

ZAB

ZaBoozer

Ta Casey, much appreciated.

It seems to be universal with job cuts. The EU and OZ have really slowed down. I did give consideration to them, but there is not enough security for me.

The states has more than enough engineers. Things are also not going to well there. I did look.

I have mates in all of these places and they keep asking me about work here. They all want to come back as there is nothing going where they are.

Certain parts of Africa however are booming. They have reached their rock bottom and are starting to rebuild. SA is just too corrupt. Unfortunately SA has to go the same way as the rest of Africa before sanity prevails. It is just one of those things.

It is my pleasure to share with you and I am glad you got something out of it.

Cheers,

ZAB

martina12

Cough cough splutter splutter....'Victorian is cheap' I beg to differ my dear SA friend! my house maybe antique but it is unique....and certainly not cheap...Hmmm I think I may have a sparring partner

CelticZebra

I was impressed to read your thoughts for the future, for it is not scary, quite exciting, I was impressed as I have only really just begun to understand how much nicer the future is, without drinking, over the past few months so I figure you are doing very well... Well done on your journey so far 😃

Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself

ZaBoozer

Haha M, you said Victorian, nit antique. Antique, well maybe you should get those blokes from antique roadshow to visit?

ZaBoozer

Ta CZ, much appreciated.

That say that the future is what we make of it, well something like that. Some things we may have control over, others not. Just because we stop drinking, does not mean we stop living.

I am glad that you are seeing a light without booze in yours.

Cheers,

ZAB

ZaBoozer

Good morning all,

It is the start of day forty nine for me. I cannot believe the time has flown like this. It is dark outside, mind you I have been at work since 05H30. Traffic is just getting worse by the day. Business first.

Physically I am great. I did not have a headache this morning. I will not jinx it and say anything more about it. I slept well last night. I woke before the alarm clock. It seems as if I sleep between four and five hours at a time at the moment. At least it is not interrupted. I don't have any problems falling asleep and I don't have any dreams that I can recall.

Mentally I am good. I am looking forward to the week. Not so much work, although that is part of it, but the tiling and stuff that I have to finish. It is keeping me motivated. Somehow my creative side is coming out.

Emotionally I am stable. It helped getting a load off my chest with last nights post. Unfortunately I am not one of those types to go lie down on a couch somewhere and talk. I may be a slow mover, but I like to think everything through. This is a new week and we shall see what it brings.

Well I will put down a few more tiles this evening. I will continue to do so until the patio is finished. Then comes the easy part - the grouting. Once this is done then I am pretty much done with the tiling. The only thing left to do then is to pain the inside of the house. Mind numbing stuff. I cant wait until it's done. I want my piano back out. I have the urge to start playing again.

The book is coming along. Not as quickly as I would like. I am giving some more thought to what I already have down. Here is a question for you international folk - Porridge or Gruel?

Well, it is time for a cup of coffee. It is freezing this morning. I think that it is colder inside than out. They must have the air conditioner on full blast. Then a smoke.

Be safe and be strong.

Cheers,

ZAB

Dee74

Porridge.

D

martina12

I'll second Dee on porridge!