lonely on Easter and random musings on drinking as a reward

Old 04-05-2015, 11:17 AM
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lonely on Easter and random musings on drinking as a reward

I know this is a forum on being sober but feeling very lonely today, out of town for work, since Tuesday, was supposed to be only for 3 days and looking like it will be 10 ... my mind has thrown every excuse in the book at me why I should drink and normally times like this I would comfort myself with the fact that I was going to party hard when I got home ... I know it's sad to comfort yourself with the consumption of rotten vegetable matter but that's what I did and now I'm having a hard time figuring out what to look forward to, I know there are plenty of healthy things I could focus on but nothing is a substitute for knowing how hard I would party and celebrate being home
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Old 04-05-2015, 11:49 AM
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It took giving away everything for me to understand that drinking and using were not rewards. They turned everything to he** on earth for me. Play this one through..Tomorrow you will wake up with a hangover and regret drinking. Who wants to regret one more thing? I sure the heck don't.
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Old 04-05-2015, 12:27 PM
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I found there were times that drinking motivated me. I would whiz through the work day because i knew i'd drink at the end of the day. Or I'd wake up in the mornings, and feel a lack of motivation and nothing to look forward to, so i'd take a drink or two to give me energy and get that rush of excitement for the day. This doesn't work. Like latte said, it gives you hangovers and regret.
We need to find true and meaningful motivation in life. Be it a walk in nature. A yoga class. A book to read. Friends to call or meet. So many fun sober things to do in life.
I do know what you mean - the excitement and rush from the first few drinks is amazing. But those really short moments of excitement and fun only result in regret and hangovers and embarrassment and a loss of money for me!
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Old 04-05-2015, 12:48 PM
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Drinking is not the answer its the problem
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Old 04-05-2015, 01:02 PM
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I liked to use drinking as a cure for loneliness. It took me a while to realize that drinking was the cause of my loneliness. The majority of my friends are non drinkers. People who don't drink get tired of hanging out with someone who is drunk.

When I'm not drinking, I'm more fun, creative, calm, and caring.

I understand the looking forward to drinking part. I really do. But it really helps to look at the overall impact drinking has on your life and judge if its worth it.

For me, it's not. I've lost too much and I am not willing to lose anymore for a buzz.
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Old 04-05-2015, 01:09 PM
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A hotel in a strange town on Easter in early sobriety...that sounds pretty darn awful. Yuck!

Originally Posted by bluhend View Post
... my mind has thrown every excuse in the book at me why I should drink ... I'm having a hard time figuring out what to look forward to...
I feel you, Buddy. Been there, done that. The obsessing can lead to suffering. What can you do to break the status quo? Go for a walk? Go see a movie? I had to get out of my space and out of my head at times like you're describing.

That obsessing is also slavery. My addiction was enslaving me, and I never knew it until I was free.

The voice in my head trying to convince me to drink seemed relentless...until I starved that sunnavabeach long enough. Then one night I was getting into bed and the thought hit me - I didn't think about drinking all day today. The freedom settled over me like a down comforter and that night I slept the sleep of the newly liberated.

You can do this.
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Old 04-05-2015, 02:25 PM
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Try to make a gift of those three to ten days, bluhend. Instead of focusing on being alone, look into what you might do with the time. Is there anything cool to do in the town that doesn't involve drinking? Maybe hit a book store? Take in a movie?
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Old 04-05-2015, 04:35 PM
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I agree with Myth - look around at what the town offers for you to do, sober.

Drinking on loneliness was kinda like adding gasoline ro the fire for me - I was still lonely, but now drunk as well and full of self pity.

Think past the immediate bluhend. You can get through these days away from home sober.

Imagine that achievement?

nothing is a substitute for knowing how hard I would party and celebrate being home
because you haven't tried another way yet?
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