Something I have learned here
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Originally Posted by thomas11 
Great post haennie, interesting you joined in 2010 and plugged away for 4 years before finally getting it right. that's pretty awesome.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Originally Posted by thomas11
There is an old saying that is "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink". I am starting to learn what that means on a very serious level here at SR. People try and try to quit drugs and alcohol with the best of intentions. But it almost seems like it is not likely to happen until that person is ready. And everyone's "readiness" is different. I've learned some new terms here like a high bottom, which is rock bottom at a different level, correct? Anyway, reading another post, I kind of related to what people were saying, and that was that they were there to help 24/7 but if you aren't ready, we are wasting our time. "wasting our time" is probably not the right phrase, but I get it. It makes sense to me. I guess it depends on the the individuals involved.
This post is merely an observation, I have another post in which I will need input. Thank you.
This post is merely an observation, I have another post in which I will need input. Thank you.
"High Bottom " and readiness I believe are tied intimately and not only keep people away from sobriety but probably kill many. Not just the person who is a HB but the collateral damage to others.
As a person who did not lose many worldly possessions, it took me a very long time to comprehend I had lost / was losing many more important things in my life. One day I realized that my values and beliefs no longer mimicked by actions and behaviors. I had reached the point of sick and tired of being sick and tired and became "ready".
Readiness I believe has two components. One is acceptance that we have a deadly problem. I accepted this several years ago but still did nothing. The other is the willingness to change. THAT becomes the action verb. We not only accept the problem, we accept the solution.
I wonder sometimes if the "high bottom" is the saddest of all drunks. Having "everything" but lost all, loving nothing.
Glad grace showed up in my life!!
Happy Easter
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
I agree with a few about not being ready. I was certainly not at all ready to stop drinking.
Don't know what made me think of this cartoon, but it applies in my case. I dared to step over the line one too many times.
Don't know what made me think of this cartoon, but it applies in my case. I dared to step over the line one too many times.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
[QUOTE=LBrain;5298667]I agree with a few about not being ready. I was certainly not at all ready to stop drinking.
Don't know what made me think of this cartoon, but it applies in my case. I dared to step over the line one too many times.
perfect!
Don't know what made me think of this cartoon, but it applies in my case. I dared to step over the line one too many times.
perfect!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Midwest
Posts: 419
Originally Posted by GracieLou
There are so many factors that will make or break a person's program. Sometimes it takes years for them to figure out what that is. It can be as simple as surrender or acceptance.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
Perfect cartoon! Thanks...
I would not have gotten sober if I weren't pressed back against the wall with medical issues. My intent was to do this for six months, complete my medical treatment, make the doc happy...
I am high bottom (wow, look at that cute high bottom!) in the sense that I never had legal or financial losses, had a great career, etc. I soon discovered that I had "kept it together" by using a tremendous amount of energy & intention, & had taken other, quieter losses. For example, I mostly drank alone at home, partially because my professional reputation was important to me. Keeping my drinking a secret meant that I said "no" to people, to opportunities for friendship. I said "no" to yoga classes and challenging hikes. I stayed protected, and thus most of my losses were in possibilities.
In the end, I was heart achingly lonely.
So my "high bottom" was like those undies you can buy that have the fake butt pads in them to make your bottom look better!
I passed the six month point a couple of months ago. I considered having a drink to celebrate having moved through my medical odyssey. But, my life is better & I don't want to stop. Those invisible hurt places are healing. I'm taking risks & am growing.
So, I agree that sometimes an imposed sobriety can bring about the real thing! If I had not been "forced into this," I might not have walked through the door to my new life...
Some people call the magic of this journey - with all its coincidence & happenings - the touch of God, a grace. I feel like all the planets aligned to put me exactly where I was when "sobriety found me." I just have to keep up with the changes!!
I would not have gotten sober if I weren't pressed back against the wall with medical issues. My intent was to do this for six months, complete my medical treatment, make the doc happy...
I am high bottom (wow, look at that cute high bottom!) in the sense that I never had legal or financial losses, had a great career, etc. I soon discovered that I had "kept it together" by using a tremendous amount of energy & intention, & had taken other, quieter losses. For example, I mostly drank alone at home, partially because my professional reputation was important to me. Keeping my drinking a secret meant that I said "no" to people, to opportunities for friendship. I said "no" to yoga classes and challenging hikes. I stayed protected, and thus most of my losses were in possibilities.
In the end, I was heart achingly lonely.
So my "high bottom" was like those undies you can buy that have the fake butt pads in them to make your bottom look better!
I passed the six month point a couple of months ago. I considered having a drink to celebrate having moved through my medical odyssey. But, my life is better & I don't want to stop. Those invisible hurt places are healing. I'm taking risks & am growing.
So, I agree that sometimes an imposed sobriety can bring about the real thing! If I had not been "forced into this," I might not have walked through the door to my new life...
Some people call the magic of this journey - with all its coincidence & happenings - the touch of God, a grace. I feel like all the planets aligned to put me exactly where I was when "sobriety found me." I just have to keep up with the changes!!
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