Still drinkng like an addict...
Still drinkng like an addict...
Coffee.
Every day.
I'm drinking coffee alcoholicly - every single day I say to myself tomorrow I'll cut back. Every day I don't. Always tomorrow.
Several days a week when I've already had too much I say to myself 'you've already had too much' ... Then; 'hell with it, I'll cut back tomorrow'.
I'm sure that it underpins my stress and my exhaustion and my sleep problems and my general fatigue in detrimental ways.
How very frustrating....
Every day.
I'm drinking coffee alcoholicly - every single day I say to myself tomorrow I'll cut back. Every day I don't. Always tomorrow.
Several days a week when I've already had too much I say to myself 'you've already had too much' ... Then; 'hell with it, I'll cut back tomorrow'.
I'm sure that it underpins my stress and my exhaustion and my sleep problems and my general fatigue in detrimental ways.
How very frustrating....
I love coffee too. When I was drinking, I would wake up in the morning and drink 2-3 bottles of water due to dehydration and maybe a half cup of coffee. Since quitting, I have been drinking coffee like a mad man. I got a really nice "Thank You" card from Folgers in the mail yesterday. (i kid)
Have you tried switching to decaf or even half regular/half decaf? For me I love the taste so decaf in the afternoon or evening works for me.
Have you tried switching to decaf or even half regular/half decaf? For me I love the taste so decaf in the afternoon or evening works for me.
I can relate. When I quit drinking, my coffee and cigarette consumption went way up. I kicked the cigarettes after 13 months of sobriety. I'm down to about 4-6 cups of coffee a day. I don't really have any suggestions other than try and ween yourself down. I know the headaches and fatigue from just not drinking any coffee were too much for me. Good luck!
What else Are you guys doing for recovery? reading? Writing? Meditation? I al,oat always have a bottled water in my hand or nearby. In the beginning it was a caffiene free diet Pepsi will lots of ice. So, the bottled water is an improvement!
But you're all smart to recognize the behavior.
Love from Lenina
But you're all smart to recognize the behavior.
Love from Lenina
I've tried all kinds of weaning approaches... They seem to help for a while.... Until they don't and then I'm bingeing harder than ever....
So familiar....
Moderate.... Fail... Moderate..... Fail....
'Moderate!!??'
I may have to 12 step my coffee
So familiar....
Moderate.... Fail... Moderate..... Fail....
'Moderate!!??'
I may have to 12 step my coffee
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Hi Owl,
I started doing the same thing during the summer before my relapse. It started in June 2013 with a Pepsi every day, then 2, then 3, then 10! I hadn't had an alcoholic drink for over 5 years but was drinking caffeine like it was water! I used to go to the convenience store and get those huge 60 oz cups!
I even went to AA meetings to try to quit caffeine! Weird, I know! Haha. Anyway, I eventually drank again on October 24, 2013 after 5.5 years of sobriety and I feel that the caffeine was a huge reason I relapsed. It was like a "gateway" drug. I quit caffeine cold turkey on October 24, 2013 but replaced it with alcohol! Ugh! I have since read studies pointing caffeine to increase cravings for alcohol & higher relapse rates. :-(
I think I was drinking caffeine to change the way I felt. I think I actually got some kind of weird "high" from it because I was drinking SO much of it every day. I felt like **** and like you, I kept saying "I'll quit tomorrow". I did...but switched to booze. Don't do what I did! :-(
Sooo....I totally relate to your post and am so glad you are posting about it and addressing it! Maybe you could take a few days to sleep, drink lots of water, etc..kind of "detox" off the caffeine?
PM me if you need anything...
I started doing the same thing during the summer before my relapse. It started in June 2013 with a Pepsi every day, then 2, then 3, then 10! I hadn't had an alcoholic drink for over 5 years but was drinking caffeine like it was water! I used to go to the convenience store and get those huge 60 oz cups!
I even went to AA meetings to try to quit caffeine! Weird, I know! Haha. Anyway, I eventually drank again on October 24, 2013 after 5.5 years of sobriety and I feel that the caffeine was a huge reason I relapsed. It was like a "gateway" drug. I quit caffeine cold turkey on October 24, 2013 but replaced it with alcohol! Ugh! I have since read studies pointing caffeine to increase cravings for alcohol & higher relapse rates. :-(
I think I was drinking caffeine to change the way I felt. I think I actually got some kind of weird "high" from it because I was drinking SO much of it every day. I felt like **** and like you, I kept saying "I'll quit tomorrow". I did...but switched to booze. Don't do what I did! :-(
Sooo....I totally relate to your post and am so glad you are posting about it and addressing it! Maybe you could take a few days to sleep, drink lots of water, etc..kind of "detox" off the caffeine?
PM me if you need anything...
Interesting. I love coffee too. But I find that I am not drinking it every day. If it's there I'll have a cup or sometimes make it. But I'm finding myself just drinking water when I get up. Coffee is an afterthought now.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Washington, MO
Posts: 2,306
Yup, 3 cups today (a binge for me), 2 tomorrow and 1 Tuesday as it will be my last day for nicotine. I tend to get up between 4 and 5am so long nights have never been me but I've found drinking 2 cups or even just 1, I can make it through a movie with the wife and even some nice convo+ later. Not possible if I do 3 or more. Kind of the turtle/hare thing going on. I'd rather be the turtle and finish this race (my nic taper depends on it so I WILL). Best wishes FO--I know you've been struggling with this since the Ginormous caffeine thread some months back--me too.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
I used to be a very heavy coffee drinker. My coffee consumption lowered significantly as I started drinking alcohol more and more -- I guess trading one drug/behavior with another one, in some aspects at least. When I got sober, I recognized a clear desire for more coffee again, and I did start to drink more. What helped was that I had a lot of anxiety in early sobriety that was made worse by too much coffee, so I cut down on the coffee again because I often could not think straight and focus under the influence of more than 2 cups of coffee in the morning. I've been able to stick with that on most days, but occasionally I do binge on it especially when I'm in some place where it's being offered constantly (eg. conferences and some work meetings). Some days, I don't have coffee at all and it's not a noticeable issue. I also have other behaviors I still tend to binge on, that can sometimes be disruptive. What often helps is to observe what mental states trigger these desires... just like getting familiar with alcoholic triggers and urges. Then try to work on dealing with the triggering mindsets or events differently -- I find this to be easier and more effective than trying to control and limit my reactions only. I also tried replacing caffeinated coffee with decaf, tea, or other drinks like juices, smoothies -- that just does not seem to work for me as I don't desire those the same way. So there is definitely a lot about the actual effect of coffee for me. What I do seem to like to sip on all day, strangely, is water. So there is always a water bottle with me... but I sometimes limit myself due to too many evacuation needs
I would say, if moderating coffee is difficult, and you worry about this, cut it out completely. Maybe do it cold turkey -- a few days of discomfort but might be more efficient?
I would say, if moderating coffee is difficult, and you worry about this, cut it out completely. Maybe do it cold turkey -- a few days of discomfort but might be more efficient?
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