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After one year of sobriety...

Old 03-25-2015, 07:54 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Well it was funny when I was in college but not so much anymore. I'm supporting a lot of people in my family right now and if I mess up it affects A LOT of people. I'm not your typical 24 year old. I have a lot of people depending on me. I had to grow up quickly after college. I really feel alone right now. Everyone is disappointed in me and I can't talk about my problems everyone needs me to be perfect right now but I'm falling apart. I wish I could be like any other 24 year old going out and drinking and being selfish but I cant. I don't have that luxury. My boyfriend doesn't even know of he can be with me. Life is getting really heavy right now....
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Old 03-25-2015, 08:05 PM
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Originally Posted by ~Lia~ View Post
I can have fun in a bar with friends
I couldn't. My advice would to start moving away from what "normal people my age do" and start doing "what non-drinkers my age do". For years, bars meant "fun" to me. My first day out of rehab I went to a bar for lunch to prove to myself that I could still hang out in places like that. I didn't want my life to be devoid of FUN forever. Alas, the longer I sat on that barstool, the longer I suffered. It really wasn't that fun drinking seltzer in that bar..... in fact it was downright depressing.

Many of us have found that taking our lives down a different lifestyle path was the way to go. Taking bars out of the equation almost entirely made staying sober long-term easier in my experience. That doesn't mean living a boring life of a spinster or old maid. It just means transforming what "fun" means in your head and brain.

As for Colorado being the CRAFT BREW capital of XYZ, we sympathize. That said, alcoholics in Milwaukee, Dublin, Miami, Sydney, New York, Chicago, Belfast, Seattle, Boston, London and Los Angeles can also provide you stories on why THEIR town is the worst place to be an alcoholic and they all have pretty convincing cases too.

Now for the good part about being in Colorado. It's of the most heralded outdoor recreational spots in the world. People flock there from all corners of the earth to ski, hike, mountain bike, etc. There are huge communities of runners, health nuts, cyclists, and skiers. Not to mention all those earthy folk who grow their own alfalfa and enjoy the sunrise from their mountain homes with fresh coffee and whole-grain toast. There are careers for tour guides, explorers, mountaineers and ranchers. The options are endless! Do any of those activities appeal to you at all? Have you ever wanted to try something and said "nah, some other time"? Make NOW your time! Find a cause that really grabs your heart and soul and do it. If you want to get out of the region, what's wrong with traveling?

There's so much more to life than a barstool. Don't let yourself get distracted about feeling uncomfortable in a place that doesn't enhance your life and doesn't deserve your company. Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and start livin'.
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Old 03-25-2015, 08:18 PM
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Welcome back young lady! Just keep coming back and take it easy, one step at a time!
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Old 03-25-2015, 08:23 PM
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Glad your back!
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Old 03-25-2015, 09:35 PM
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Don't be so hard on yourself and throw what accomplishments you DO have...pick up and carry on and forgot about how many days you have!!! Get your move on!!
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Old 03-25-2015, 10:01 PM
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Hang in there! Just get right back on that horse! I relapsed after 5.5 years and only have a week now. I feel your pain but it is what it is. I know I will learn something from my relapse and so will you! There is always a silver lining.

Best of luck! Don't beat yourself up! It's pointless.
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Old 03-25-2015, 10:09 PM
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A relapse, if not an abused excuse, is what it is. It doesnt mean much of anything if you keep going so again keep going.....
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Old 03-25-2015, 11:43 PM
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I'm sorry you have to go through that but I'm glad you're back youngladysober.

Yeah, it never gets better - always the same ending, or worse.

D
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Old 03-26-2015, 12:05 AM
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I agree about the geographical location not meaning anything.

I lived in a small town in the middle of nowhere. It was the "capital of $5.99 fifths of vodka at the grocery store."

Now I live in an actual craft brew capital and it's annoying but I just avoid bars.
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Old 03-26-2015, 05:17 AM
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loads of young people are getting sober now. i see it everyday in aa. much younger than 24. 17 ,18, 20 year olds are coming into aa getting sober. I'm 34 and I'm ready to be sober, especially for me and my kids.
one needs to not think there missing out by not drinking but rather realise that we have lost our right to drink because its not working for us. And it never gets better it progresses. Thank god you were not taken advantage of being passed out in a bar. Welcome back
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