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Old 03-23-2015, 10:06 PM   #1 (permalink)
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came here to find support:)


Hey! well this is my first post and I know not many of you will care but I stumbled upon this site after realizing I finally needed to make a change. I'm trying hard to stay sober but it just doesn't seem to be working. I realized I needed to make a serious conscious decision to stay sober after receiving a call from my probation officer telling me I failed my last two UA's. she said its my last warning before I get sent off to jail so I guess this is my wake up call to finally stick to sobriety 100% and keep my nose clean. don't know what I'm looking for in this post other than to reach out and find some others who are in my position and can be my support and accountability partners. don't have many others in my life right now since I made the choice to quit. but I'm thinking strangers who are going through the same thing might be the best thing for me right now.

Anyways, my names Em and I'm looking to find myself again in this rocky road to recovery. I want to meet you!! tell me about yourself! and if you could help me in this difficult journey I would be forever grateful!
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Old 03-23-2015, 10:21 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi Em, I'm glad you found SR; I came across it by chance just after I'd become sober, and it's a life-line for me. I'm sure it's helped me stay sober in the long run.
I'd encourage you to do a lot of reading on the forums, especially around the topic of cravings and breaking old habits.
Where have you stumbled in the past? Is it because there's alcohol in the house? Old habits kicking in? Lack of support?
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Old 03-23-2015, 10:22 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Hello Em. Think you' find lots of support here. Lots of different methods and situations but all seeking the same goal.
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Old 03-23-2015, 10:51 PM   #4 (permalink)
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well I never really thought I had a problem until just recently. I always thought I could control it or get around it somehow. I really never drank until about a year ago when I met this guy who was (at one point) the most amazing thing in my life. he was an intense alcoholic and we would drink EVERY night. literally till the point we were both blacked out and wake up the next morning doing it all again. I ended up getting a DUI (inevitable I guess with the way we were drinking) and put on a year of probation, counseling etc. 4 UA's a month weren't even enough to stop me from chasing my problems away so we switched to other drugs that weren't as detectable for as long. worst mistake. it fueled my addiction 10 fold. instead of drinking I started using crystal meth for the last 6 months.

long story short, our relationship became rocky about a month ago and I moved back in with my mother (also a long time alcoholic) now without the access to other drugs I have unlimited daily access to alcohol so I found myself back in the throes of alcoholism. drinking daily before work. bottles every night. now I'm failing my drug tests for alcohol which stays in the system for at least 5 days and I have no other option but to quit EVERYTHING ALTOGETHER, or go back in front of the judge and face prison time. I choose to quit. its only been a few days bit I'm struggling especially having so much access to it. and being so lonely here without "him" (even though he was such a bad influence on me) has been horrendously hard.

sorry for the long rant just wanted to kinda get my story out there and find some support from others who might be struggling with the same type of addiction. I'll spend my time reading on the forum especially about coping mechanisms for when these horrible crystal cravings hit.
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Old 03-23-2015, 11:37 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Glad you are here NB - You will find much support & understanding here. Everyone here traveling the same road....you are not alone in this!
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Old 03-24-2015, 03:53 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Welcome Newbeginnings/Em its nice to meet you youl find so much support here
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Old 03-24-2015, 05:14 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Emma, good luck on your journey. You've come to the right place!
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Old 03-24-2015, 06:35 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Hi.
By now you probably realize that trying to control something usually means it’s out of control.
In my history I immersed myself in AA which has helped millions and has meetings world wide so we can be among people who understand us.
In all honesty I didn’t know what I didn’t know so I had a lot of learning to do by going to many meetings and getting active.
I learned that the first drink gets me drunk so I needed to stay away from many hangouts and people who drank/used. Alcohol is cunning, powerful, baffling and insidious often telling us “just one will be ok.” NO, NO.
I needed to get honest with myself about my drinking and accept the fact I cannot drink in safety one day at a time in a row.
Soon I/we need to work on the reasons we drink and make changes so we can enjoy life again.
It’s basically simple but not always easy. I won’t say this loud but I even got on my knees and asked MY Higher Power to help me stay away from the first drink. Things have worked out for a lot of years and I hope they do for you also.

BE WELL
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ALCOHOL-ISM= INCREDIBLE SHORT MEMORY.

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WHAT I USED TO CALL BOREDOM I NOW CALL SERENITY.
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Old 03-24-2015, 03:14 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Welcome to the Forum Em!!
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Old 03-24-2015, 05:09 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Welcome Em

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Old 03-24-2015, 08:28 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Welcome to the forum Em.
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Old 03-24-2015, 09:21 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Welcome Em! One of the aspects I have found really helpful are the SR chat meetings. They are tuesdays and fridays at 8p CST.
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