First week down!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 132
First week down!
Well, it's been a solid week since the last drink. I still find myself thinking that this is just another passing phase (one of my bad days? 
) and that I will go back to drinking one day. When those thoughts cross my mind I try to immediately remind myself of just how many reasons I have for permanently quitting drinking. And there are many!
I'm also slowly working out of the mini-depression I was experiencing from the drinking. Honestly, my life is so good in most ways and I feel like I almost use drinking as a crutch for getting my anxiety out. If I'm drinking it gives me a reason to feel bad about myself, to feel lazy, to eat like crap, to skip the gym, to hide away in my house. I know these sound like bad things, but sometimes I feel so pressured to always be ON and I don't give myself a break unless I'm drunk or hungover.
So I'm practicing giving myself down time when I'm sober. It's ok to be lazy sometimes, it's ok to eat the cheeseburger, it's ok to hermit when I don't feel like hanging out. This makes me sound total type A, and I'm not even a little, but after screwing up so many things in my past and getting so many things right in my present, it's scary to have the responsibility of being a real adult! But I'm going to try. And I'm going to not be so hard on myself about everything in my life EXCEPT drinking. THAT I am working hard to eradicate.
My gift to myself for my first week sober? Two new books that I'm excited to read. Friday night dates at the book store are some of my favorite And a lot cheaper than the bar!
) and that I will go back to drinking one day. When those thoughts cross my mind I try to immediately remind myself of just how many reasons I have for permanently quitting drinking. And there are many!I'm also slowly working out of the mini-depression I was experiencing from the drinking. Honestly, my life is so good in most ways and I feel like I almost use drinking as a crutch for getting my anxiety out. If I'm drinking it gives me a reason to feel bad about myself, to feel lazy, to eat like crap, to skip the gym, to hide away in my house. I know these sound like bad things, but sometimes I feel so pressured to always be ON and I don't give myself a break unless I'm drunk or hungover.
So I'm practicing giving myself down time when I'm sober. It's ok to be lazy sometimes, it's ok to eat the cheeseburger, it's ok to hermit when I don't feel like hanging out. This makes me sound total type A, and I'm not even a little, but after screwing up so many things in my past and getting so many things right in my present, it's scary to have the responsibility of being a real adult! But I'm going to try. And I'm going to not be so hard on myself about everything in my life EXCEPT drinking. THAT I am working hard to eradicate.
My gift to myself for my first week sober? Two new books that I'm excited to read. Friday night dates at the book store are some of my favorite
And a lot cheaper than the bar!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 351
Well done. I've started experimenting with hanging out in Starbucks the odd evening. And it's usually decaf these days too. But all good and peaceful and nice to get a good nights sleep and wake up hangover free.
The drinking me would have cackled with laughter at the thought…
The drinking me would have cackled with laughter at the thought…
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 21
Well done! Sounds like you're doing great. I really relate to your comments about relying upon booze to allow yourself some down time, or often in my case, to enjoy anything. I feel guilty when I'm sober if I'm not being productive enough. I'll be working on that! Again, congratulations!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 132
Thank you all! I appreciate all the support
A friend on Facebook just posted an article about learning to moderate drinking, and I totally took the bait and read it. I suppose what some people refer to as my AV was goading me on, telling me I might learn something new to try in that article, something to help me keep alcohol in my life without risking anything. Same thing it's said before.
Before I even finished reading I knew I was just teasing myself and I remembered all the times I've tried to "moderate" before. It never worked. And like someone in the article said, it's too much WORK trying to moderate, it isn't even fun. Which I guess goes to show how easy it is to obsess over alcohol. In a way I'm still obsessing, but maybe as I adjust to life without it I won't have to think so hard or so much about it in the future?
Anyway, I wasn't feeling very good after I read that article. I felt like I was tempting myself and I was letting myself have a small pity party, but I came straight here after that. I felt good about that choice but I felt AWESOME when I saw all the kind words from everyone!
So thanks a bunch, guys. It's really nice to get the positive vibes and its giving me motivation to stay strong and to make sure I'm posting here often for myself AND replying to other posts. If like to help make someone feel as good as I do right now
A friend on Facebook just posted an article about learning to moderate drinking, and I totally took the bait and read it. I suppose what some people refer to as my AV was goading me on, telling me I might learn something new to try in that article, something to help me keep alcohol in my life without risking anything. Same thing it's said before.
Before I even finished reading I knew I was just teasing myself and I remembered all the times I've tried to "moderate" before. It never worked. And like someone in the article said, it's too much WORK trying to moderate, it isn't even fun. Which I guess goes to show how easy it is to obsess over alcohol. In a way I'm still obsessing, but maybe as I adjust to life without it I won't have to think so hard or so much about it in the future?
Anyway, I wasn't feeling very good after I read that article. I felt like I was tempting myself and I was letting myself have a small pity party, but I came straight here after that. I felt good about that choice but I felt AWESOME when I saw all the kind words from everyone!
So thanks a bunch, guys. It's really nice to get the positive vibes and its giving me motivation to stay strong and to make sure I'm posting here often for myself AND replying to other posts. If like to help make someone feel as good as I do right now
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Originally Posted by KeepTruckin 
maybe as I adjust to life without it I won't have to think so hard or so much about it in the future?
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
I know KT - those moderation articles seem to be making the rounds again. One that I read recently said it probably wouldn't work for certain people. Yup, that would be me.
I obsessed about not drinking in the early days, but now it rarely crosses my mind. It will get easier - promise.
I obsessed about not drinking in the early days, but now it rarely crosses my mind. It will get easier - promise.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 154
My first week also just gone by . 9 days today. Saturday night I was a caged animal in house but Sunday felt great. Like my senses had awoken. Sun was out. birds were singing. Sundays haven't been the clearest of days for me for past ten years. I asked a friend how was the night out in the pub was and they said "same old". I didn't miss anything. Well done on your first week.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 105
well done, great stuff!
I hear what you say about moderation. I have known many, previously heavy drinkers successfully moderate as they got older - but it was something that came naturally to them. Their appetites changed and they cut down without any 'work', without any battle, without any plan. Just part of their maturation. When it started to hurt a bit, they made changes. Some have now lost interest completely in alcohol; others have the odd drink.
I have moderated a great deal since my peak but it has involved a lot of work, a lot of planning and a lot of energy. It creates a permanent tension in me around alcohol and I think I have had enough; besides - too many bad memories linked to alcohol to really enjoy it in any carefree way.
I cannot yet conceive of myself as someone who will never drink again but I am taking the advice of far more experienced people here and living it one day at a time. For the record, today is day 10! :-)
Well done Keep Truckin; I think the first week, and especially the first weekend, are important milestones.
Best wishes
CC
I hear what you say about moderation. I have known many, previously heavy drinkers successfully moderate as they got older - but it was something that came naturally to them. Their appetites changed and they cut down without any 'work', without any battle, without any plan. Just part of their maturation. When it started to hurt a bit, they made changes. Some have now lost interest completely in alcohol; others have the odd drink.
I have moderated a great deal since my peak but it has involved a lot of work, a lot of planning and a lot of energy. It creates a permanent tension in me around alcohol and I think I have had enough; besides - too many bad memories linked to alcohol to really enjoy it in any carefree way.
I cannot yet conceive of myself as someone who will never drink again but I am taking the advice of far more experienced people here and living it one day at a time. For the record, today is day 10! :-)
Well done Keep Truckin; I think the first week, and especially the first weekend, are important milestones.
Best wishes
CC
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