Paying the price.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 369
Paying the price.
So as some of you may know I had 73 days sober the drank on Friday then again on Sunday. Was ok yesterday and thought I'd gotten off lucky and could jump right back on the wagon. But today I need a drink so bad. My heart is racing I'm shaky again like I'm already having withdrawl. Doesn't seem like I would already but here I am. I almost feel like I have to drink today. I was over this part sucks to be back here. If you are sober and think you can have a few don't do it. I played with fire. I only drank twice and it's right back to how it was when I quit.
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
"I almost feel like I have to drink today."
Yes, but that is only a FEELING, as you well know. Don't bend over for your AV just yet! Put up a fight!
It may FEEL like you're right back where you started, but physiologically you're not. If you keep going though, you're going to cross that line, and then all bets are off.
You can handle some withdrawal.
You can handle some discomfort.
Think how cool it would be to have St. Patricks day as your new sobriety date! (Not the day after St. Patricks Day, but the day itself).
The "I need a drink so bad" is absolute ********. You need sobriety so bad. Your body needs and wants to be sober. Your soul needs and wants to be sober. Take your power back!
Yes, but that is only a FEELING, as you well know. Don't bend over for your AV just yet! Put up a fight!
It may FEEL like you're right back where you started, but physiologically you're not. If you keep going though, you're going to cross that line, and then all bets are off.
You can handle some withdrawal.
You can handle some discomfort.
Think how cool it would be to have St. Patricks day as your new sobriety date! (Not the day after St. Patricks Day, but the day itself).
The "I need a drink so bad" is absolute ********. You need sobriety so bad. Your body needs and wants to be sober. Your soul needs and wants to be sober. Take your power back!
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Hi Dave, it sounds like this isn't your first rodeo, so you know about withdrawal, and you know there is no way around it, you have go through it eventually. drinking would just reset the withdrawal clock. The sooner you get through it, the sooner you'll feel better and get on with life. I'm sure you know all this, just trying to encourage you not to put off the inevitable. Good luck man.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 369
I don't know if it's already withdrawl or just anxiety which I never had until the last few years of my drinking career. But when I get withdrawl I get huge anxiety. It's all mixed up and smashed together to make me feel crazy. Drinking helps but makes it worse in the long run. I was hoping it would go away once I stopped but it didn't I know it can take months or years to completely heal. I suspect I had PAWS and that's why I drank again. I know it's an excuse but it's just been a constant marathon just getting through the day sober. I just don't feel right. Just foggy and anxious and outside my self. The most unpleasant feeling of depersonalization imaginable for hours and days on end. I know it'll only get better by going through it. People say alcohol is insidious and powerful. That's why it is for me because it changed my brain so much that it doesn't function properly without it. Even months later. But it's so very easy to feel better. I know that's unsustainable but it's been hard for me to think long term lately. I'll just start again Monday I think. Just finish out the week try again Monday
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 5,785
Originally Posted by Dave36 
. I'll just start again Monday I think. Just finish out the week try again Monday
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